How to help my partner with his dirty nappy aversion?

[Cleaneatingisawesome]

My partner is a wonderful father to our 6 month old son.

The only thing he's got a big, big problem with is changing dirty nappies. He's okay with urine, but if our son does a poo my partner always starts to gag, like he's about to throw up. The smell and look just makes him feel very sick.

He always calls me for help then, even if I have a lie in.

I'm just worried how he will cope on a day when I'm out of the house and he needs to look after our son himself.

Does anyone have tips how he can overcome this?

He's had an aversion against dirty nappies his whole life and we hoped it would change with his own child, but it didn't.

Breathe through his mouth like the rest of us? The poor lamb.

Good God you must have the patience of a saint. I couldn't tolerate that sort of nonsense.

Give him a mask and tell him he just needs desensitisation through frequent exposure.

It's going to get worse when your child is older and fully weaned. Changing a 6 month old's nappy is nothing compared to a pissed off toddler

At the risk of sounding harsh, nobody loves it and they can be gag inducing even after several years. But his aversion hasn’t changed because there has always been a get out clause: calling you to do it.

Vick under his nose to disguise the smell, practise by doing more of them.

If I’m ignoring the obvious preciousness (part and parcel of being a parent!), then I would advise a dab of vicks vapour rub under each nostril and practicing to remove the dirty nappy ASAP. He needs to make sure he cleans his hands well after using the vicks though because that would be unpleasant for the baby getting that on his bits.

How does he cope with his own poo?

Tell him to get on with it and wear ear plugs FFS

As in you wear ear plugs so you can’t hear him complaining

Put him on full-time nappy duty, no exceptions, no calling for help. He'll soon get used to it.

My DH tried this nonsense, and he got ignored.
My friends partner did and she was concerned, took over to help him, and he never had to do it.
It's utterly utterly pathetic behaviour. Does he think you like it?!

Does anyone have tips how he can overcome this?

Tell him to get a grip! How have you tolerated this for six months?

Jeeez. I bet there's never been a mother calling someone to help change a nappy because it stinks. Pathetic.

What would happen if you threw a tantrum and started gagging as soon as you opened the nappy ? Stop pandering to it tell him to grow the hell up!

What a pathetic childish way to behave. Go out and leave your child with their father. Then he'll just have to cope like the rest of us do.

Does anyone have tips how he can overcome this?

Yes, tell him to grow the fuck up and get over it. Pathetic!!

I used to gag a lot changing my DS’s nappy. Have to confess DH probably did more than his fair share when we were both available as he has very little sense of smell and coped better than next. But I had to do them when DH wasn’t around which was most of the time when I was on maternity leave and then worked part-time.

I felt awful that I was gagging whilst doing them and DS used to look at me as if wondering what I was doing, but had no choice.

I remember my dh trying this nonsense 🙄

Claim to also have developed an aversion to it.

Yes, tell him breathe through his mouth.

I bet he doesn’t clean toilets either does he?

@Cornettoninja

If I’m ignoring the obvious preciousness (part and parcel of being a parent!), then I would advise a dab of vicks vapour rub under each nostril and practicing to remove the dirty nappy ASAP. He needs to make sure he cleans his hands well after using the vicks though because that would be unpleasant for the baby getting that on his bits.

Agree with this suggestion - Vicks really works.

Or tell him to suck it up like the rest of us have to. I've gagged at plenty of shitty nappies but you just push through it.

@DartmoorDoughnut

Tell him to get on with it and wear ear plugs FFS

I know you clarified this in your next post but I definitely blinked at this a few times "earplugs? Up his nose maybe? Or in his ears? Maybe it's like the trick of putting a wooden spoon in your mouth to stop crying when cutting onions?"

I need another coffee!

Claim to also have developed an aversion to it.
This. Call him to help. Every time.

Stop stepping in to help him with nappies.

If he can deal with his own poo, he can deal with his son's.

His son's comfort and welfare should come above his own discomfort. I find his attitude to nappies rather immature sorry.
If he wants to be a great dad, then his son should come first. Part of being a parent is being vomited on, cleaning up poo or diarrhoea, getting up in the night to deal with a bed covered in sick, all manner of bodily fluids.

A baby is a dependent, and your dh is not capable of caring for him if he can't roll his sleeves up and muck in.

Doesn't everyone have an aversion to dirty nappies?