Answer the question above you. Wrong answers only. PART 3

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Previous question: Why is the swimming pool viewing gallery so hot?

Answer: Because the temperature controller is broken. It will get progressively hotter, then colder, then hotter... much like my shower at the moment!!

My question: How long will it take for THIS thread to fill up?

It is for tommorow night
What exactly is double sided sticky tape ?

It's a type of badger that's eaten too much honey.

Would you sleep in a double loft bed?

Only if the pet badger was with me
Why have most of my bulbs in the house blown at the same time?

Squirrels chewing them.
What does Boris Johnson want for Christmas?

A pet Badger who can sort Covid, Brexit & Boris's maintenance payments out.

Why are Badgers so popular on our thread?

Because we are scared of them.

Will anything interesting happen today

Boris and Andy will have fisticuffs over Greater Manchester
Sweet chilli baby beetroots ,thoughts ?

Poor little baby beetroots, how can you be so cruel & send them out to play without a winter coat & lashings of that glowy Ready Brek (chocolate flavour) inside of them.
You need reporting to the RSPCFruit & Veg.

How murderous is Andy feeling right now & is his badger growling?
And should Boris feel a bit scared?

Complete sweetie pie.

What food should I send to DD in Uni lockdown?

Vodka, run, a 2l bottle of cider and a box of wine. A slab of large if feeling generous. Plus pot noodles.

Why won't the chicken climb out the fridge go and cook itself?

Because it's a Mumsnet chicken and therefore ginormous and to fat to climb out of the fridge
I'm in Greater Manchester am I in tier three restrictions or not?

Ive just seen on Facebook we ate at war with Greater Manchester. If that helps.

Do i have to feed the children?

No Badgers don't like the taste of children. They like Mumsnet Chicken instead.

Will there be a big fight in Manchester tonight?

Yes Boris and Andy will have a wrestling match in Albert Square dressed up as Big Daddy and Giant Haystacks , Chris Whitty will be refereeing and whoever wins gets to be king of Corona
Will a Badger be a better president than Donald Trump?

@x2boys

Yes Boris and Andy will have a wrestling match in Albert Square dressed up as Big Daddy and Giant Haystacks , Chris Whitty will be refereeing and whoever wins gets to be king of Corona Will a Badger be a better president than Donald Trump?

Do bears shit in the woods? (Answering a question with a question.) Is the Pope a Catholic?

No he's a Druid in disguise

Why do I feel terribly guilty about faux mocking The Pope? (Does a Hail Mary even though I'm not Catholic)

Its. Catholic guilt , terrible guilt wether your Catholic or not
Has Boris had a haircut?

Yes, but he did it himself, blindfolded.

How have I let DCat stop me from working? (She was staring at me, wanting me to move to the sofa so that she could sit on me. I did it.)

DCat hypnotised you & she wants to use the computer herself in 5mins time.

Why does my teenage DD listen to Grime/Drill & Abba at the same time? (Well a bit of Abba then a bit of Grime & Drill rinse & repeat)

Because she's confused about which decade she was born in - 2000s (grime) or 1970s (ABBA).

Where is my money, money, money?

With the Flying Lizards, Lizards, Lizards

Sweeties, ice cream or cheese for pudding; and why?

Ice cream cheese cake with sweeties on top covers all options
Why is my remote control being an arse and only working when it feels like it ?

It’s been hacked by the Russians who disapprove of your viewing choices!

What is a woodchuck anyway?

Someone who chucks wood.

Why did the fairies not tidy up while I was out?

It's when you vomit after nibbling twigs

Who wins: Giant Haystacks v The Rock?