Just been contacted by friend abroad in dire straits

[WhatdoIdo2020]

Have name changed.

Several years ago I went on a tour of a country I've always wanted to visit. A very beautiful yet poor country with amazing wildlife. I had an amazing time and the guide was very friendly and knowledgeable. We stayed friends on Facebook and have spoken a few times since then.

Anyway he's just contacted me on Messenger and said that all the tours have been cancelled because of Covid and he's starving. He had a child who he'd saved up for to study abroad and the child recently died in an accident over there and now he's got no money and wasn't able to bring him home for the funeral.

I'm not sure what to do. Just giving? There's another one of the people on the tour who I'm still friends with on FB so I might ask if she's heard from him too.

I feel awful 😥

Be careful; it might be a scam? Sorry

Did he ask you for money straight away?
I felt sorry for him before he mentioned his child. I mean absolutely hope it's not really happened but my suspicions are a bit peaked here.

That’s sad
Do you believe him?
And why did you name change for this post?

Sounds like a scam.

Is there any way you can verify this?

First thought is scam.

I would see if it's genuine first.

Does sound like classic scam details. Contact the tour company.. Or the other person you know. Tread carefully op.

Can you get in direct contact with him, not through Messenger? It sounds like he’s been hacked and it’s a scam.

Is the msg definitely from him? I’ve had scam emails through Facebook asking for money to help with emergencies, and one of them was very believable - the scammers had gotten access to the persons earlier messages and Facebook posts and included details only known to friends.

This happened to a friend of mine, it was a scam, sorry. Be very wary of sending money..

Proceed with caution OP - definitely check with your other friend to see if they have hear and if you choose to help, please set a limit as to the support you can provide. I am not saying that your FB friend isn’t genuine, but there are so many people who have lost a great deal by being kind hearted and generous.

It's a scam. Absolute rubbish. Please ignore it.

Did you know about the child before? Is the child on Facebook? I’d look for pictures etc to verify that he has a child of the right age. Surely the child has their own profile too.

Sounds like a scam to me. It’s gutting when it’s someone you trusted. Likely all the tours have been cancelled and he is struggling and has added the rest to pull your heart strings. I would have been tempted to help until the child lie broke the trust, and I would tell him that personally.

Sounds like a scam. My elderly mum (ha - she’d hate me to use the term elderly but she is in her seventies) received an email from her friend saying she was stuck abroad and had lost her money and passport or something and could my mum urgently send money . Which my mum did - and then discovered her friend’s email had been hacked and it was all a scam. She took ages to tell me as she was very embarrassed.

If it's not scam you might want to let him know that no one's going to help him as he's adopted a classic scam technique to ask for help.

The “friend” in trouble overseas is a well known scam.

He didn't ask for money as such he just said that he's starving to death. I asked if he's got any family and he said his wife died years ago and he lost his child a couple of months back. Then he told me what happened to his child and that he couldn't bring the body back for burial. And that all the tours have been cancelled this year.

Name changed because I don't want anyone linking posts or anyone posting on "news" sites like I've seen before (dunno if that would happen).

He did seem like a good genuine person when I was there. Educated, great English, telling us interesting and funny stories. He keeps saying he's too hungry. There must be a lot of people in these situations it's awful.

Yeah, I get DMs from 'friends' saying they are in dire straits abroad - thing is it's usually people I don't know IRL (I have over 1,000 friends on Facebook, mostly for work) and who would have literally hundreds of people they could ask before they got to me!

It's generally a scam. Ask yourself why someone you haven't seen in years would need to ask YOU for money.

They're starving and asks for the money for a funeral?
It's not even a friend, but a long term acquaintance.
Sounds like a scam.

For what is worth, though, he might be desperate enough to ask people he knows for money, but with an excuse that seems less like begging.

But I'm very wary of such requests in general.

I got scam messages that appeared to be from an elderly relative in dire straits. They were hacked.

I have also had scam messages from people supposedly in dire straits abroad. I would do everything to try and check that it really is a message from him.

If he'd saved up for the child to study abroad and the child recently died, then he surely still has the money?

OP - this has scam written all over it. Just ignore.

If you feel you can't ignore, contact the holiday company and find out more.

There's one where a scammer get into someone's email and then emails everyone in that person's contact list saying that they are stuck in Manilla with no money or something. I've received quite a few of those.

If he's been hacked it must be someone who lives there because he's talking about where he is in the country, so has the knowledge. He said he was there for starting a tour in March and now it's locked down so he's stuck there.

He didn't have money for the funeral, his child has been buried in the country he was studying in. He said he wanted to bring him home but couldn't.

I'm going to send the messages to the other woman who was on the tour and see what she thinks. I'm quite upset about this.

This is pure scam.