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Original poster

Just been contacted by friend abroad in dire straits

465 replies

WhatdoIdo2020 · 12/09/2020 09:47

Have name changed.

Several years ago I went on a tour of a country I've always wanted to visit. A very beautiful yet poor country with amazing wildlife. I had an amazing time and the guide was very friendly and knowledgeable. We stayed friends on Facebook and have spoken a few times since then.

Anyway he's just contacted me on Messenger and said that all the tours have been cancelled because of Covid and he's starving. He had a child who he'd saved up for to study abroad and the child recently died in an accident over there and now he's got no money and wasn't able to bring him home for the funeral.

I'm not sure what to do. Just giving? There's another one of the people on the tour who I'm still friends with on FB so I might ask if she's heard from him too.

I feel awful 😥

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
PhilCornwall1 · 12/09/2020 11:02

@vdbfamily

Hi Op, I don't think this is necessarily a scam. If you can afford to send something then personally I would. It is good for us to give to those less fortunate and if you say you are returning soon you can find out the whole situation when you get there. If you are yourself in financial difficulty then do not give more than you can afford.
This isn't good advice at all.
CodenameVillanelle · 12/09/2020 11:02

@PremierInn

It doesn't sound like he has been hacked. I don't know why everyone is in denial about what it must be like to work in a third world country in the tourist industry during covid. Not everywhere does comfy furlough schemes you know. That doesn't mean you need to send money. The part about his child might or might not be true. I wouldn't feel bad if you sent money and it turned out he was just poor, not literally starving. What's the big deal? Equally, if you don't want/can't afford to send money, don't.
Exactly
AttilaTheMeerkat · 12/09/2020 11:03

Why now and why you anyway?.

Delete and ignore this as this is a scam designed to tug at your emotions.

GoodbyeRosie · 12/09/2020 11:05

OP, I can see you aren't listening to anything you don't want to hear, and will probably end up sending money, however..

I take it he was your classic younger man tour guide..friendly , interested in your life etc etc..took your contact details and those of other adventure seeking women ? It's a tale as old as time.

You are going to be scammed, absolutely no doubt about it but being harsh it seems like you are up that, if it means you might be helping your exotic tour guide.

AttilaTheMeerkat · 12/09/2020 11:05

Such scams are known as distress scams.

awesomeaircraft · 12/09/2020 11:05

My first instinct is scam.

My second after a google search is that it costs almost £4K to get a body back to another African country (could not find Madagascar on the price list) and that's without un-burying someone first. So we are talking a lot of money here. This has no end.

I would be tempted to contact a charity working in Madagascar and make a donation for food parcels there.

fruitbrewhaha · 12/09/2020 11:05

I'm also intrigued by your friendship on facebook, why did you feel the need to remain in touch?

CodenameVillanelle · 12/09/2020 11:05

@AttilaTheMeerkat

Why now and why you anyway?.

Delete and ignore this as this is a scam designed to tug at your emotions.

He's probably trying everyone he can think of who lives in the west
CodenameVillanelle · 12/09/2020 11:07

@AttilaTheMeerkat

Such scams are known as distress scams.
It's not a scam though if they genuinely are destitute I get that having an internet enabled device isn't entirely destitute but that doesn't mean they aren't living in poverty. Covid has destroyed many areas of the world which rely on tourism.
WearyandBleary · 12/09/2020 11:07

I’ve fallen for this after travelling. You could send a certain amount and no more. But if he comes back again in two weeks... stop.

CodenameVillanelle · 12/09/2020 11:08

@fruitbrewhaha

I'm also intrigued by your friendship on facebook, why did you feel the need to remain in touch?
Why not? I've got people on my Facebook that I met travelling. It's nice and friendly. It means I can recommend their projects to people travelling to the same area and reminds me of pleasant memories.
oakleaffy · 12/09/2020 11:09

@WhatdoIdo2020
This has vast scam written all over it.

Westerners in 'Poorer' countries are seen as ripe for the picking.
Please don't fall for it.
Definitely don't give money or set up a 'Just Giving' page.

HowFastIsTooFast · 12/09/2020 11:10

It doesn't sound like he has been hacked. I don't know why everyone is in denial about what it must be like to work in a third world country in the tourist industry during covid

No denial at all from me. I was in a tourism reliant third world country last year and during the pandemic I've spoken to my guide (a conversation initiated by me) to see how they are, what their situation is, what the future looks like for the industry in their country. I do a similar job here so we had lots in common and spoke often and in depth about the industry during my trip. It's bad for them, no denying it.

At no stage did this guide ask me for money nor drop in a sorrowful back story though 🤔 If the OPs guide ever wants to work professionally in travel again he should/would know better.

BlueThistles · 12/09/2020 11:11

Fools and their money OP.

SummerHouse · 12/09/2020 11:12

I would rather give money to a scammer than not give money to someone who is destitute.

WhoWouldHaveThoughtThat · 12/09/2020 11:13

I think if you set up a Just Giving page you will be part of the scamming process.

Who would you be encouraging to 'give' via your page?

wildcherries · 12/09/2020 11:14

I'd be very cautious. No one will ask for money straight away. I'm probably being cynical, but I'd rather be careful than end up being ripped off.

CokeyCola · 12/09/2020 11:14

I think I'd throw in a red herring and say you'll contact the tour company and ask them to organise something you'll contribute to (or another more plausible story) - he won't like that if it's a scam and if it's true then you won't have turned your back.

FOKKYFC · 12/09/2020 11:14

I think we've passed the point where occasional internet use is evidence of having a few quid salted away . . .

SockYarn · 12/09/2020 11:19

@SummerHouse

I would rather give money to a scammer than not give money to someone who is destitute.
And this is why scammers carry on scamming. Because people are stupid, gullible and want that warm fuzzy feeling that they're doing a good thing, even though they've been scammed.

A fool and their money are easily parted.

endofthelinefinally · 12/09/2020 11:20

This is a well known scam and is done by hacking. It has been around for years.

zafferana · 12/09/2020 11:21

Be careful OP. My aunt has often had these kind of begging emails from tour guides she's used in India or Africa. She goes on a lot of wildlife holidays and they use local guides and she loves to be friendly with them and keep in touch via FB afterwards. She has often sent money, clothes for DC, books and pens, all kinds of stuff. She can afford it and it's her money, but I do think that a lot of these guides, who have access to wealthy westerners, milk those relationships for what they can. Only give what you can afford and honestly, I would try to verify the situation in that place if you can.

SpookyNoise · 12/09/2020 11:21

I think you can ring using FB messenger, without actually having his number.

StayCool · 12/09/2020 11:21

I work overseas at a UK Embassy. We get queries like this all the time.
Scam.

Zaphodsotherhead · 12/09/2020 11:24

And people are starving in this country too. If you need to feel you are helping someone, donate to a foodbank.

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