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Original poster

DD 14 drink spiked

204 replies

Holdingtherope · 01/01/2020 01:08

I am at work tonight. Unbeknown to me, daughter and friends snuck out to a party. Looks like my daughter was either spiked or drunk too much.

She is fine, going in the ambulance to hospital. What will they do? I feel so helpless. Husband in bed and can’t wake him.

Suitable punishment? Only child who has hot teenager age yet and it’s so unknown. I just don’t know what to do

OP posts:
Original poster
Holdingtherope · 01/01/2020 05:42

By some stroke of magic, I got someone to come in and I got there at 5. They haven’t mentioned safeguarding just told me to ring if any concerns or confusion. I asked and they said that it may warrant a notification to the school but not social services? I advised I want support from social services.

I know I can refer directly to social services and I have but we haven’t got anywhere.

All these ‘perfect nurses’ I have never been like that but you did remind me of the student on my course who was a week or two into training and stopped at a RTA and offered assistance! 🙈

OP posts:
Mummyoflittledragon · 01/01/2020 06:14

I’m really pleased to see your with your dd op.

Original poster
Holdingtherope · 01/01/2020 06:26

Just heading home, what a night.

Feel tearful about it all and worried for the future.

Thanks vipers!

OP posts:

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Families
TamingToddler · 01/01/2020 06:39

This happened to a friend at the same age, wasn't spiked just drank way too much. Had her stomach pumped.
Our parents all handled it by letting us off the reins slightly but we absolutely had to tell them where we were at all times, who with and what we were doing. The parents would check in with one another.
We were told if something went wrong to call a parent, don't hesitate, they'd rather we were safe than worrying we would be in trouble.
Get on board with the other parents.

Pickpick101 · 01/01/2020 06:48

I hope you get the help you need for your family OP. Flowers

Toddlerteaplease · 01/01/2020 06:49

It would be classed as a safeguarding issue if a responsible adult doesn't come in. They won't be able to discharged her.

Ragwort · 01/01/2020 07:01

So many ‘experts’ here on Social Services. They are so over stretched that getting support is very difficult and it’s highly unlikely that SS would be involved for a youngster having a few too many drinks on NYE. Have any of you ever tried to actually report a concern to SS? I have & it was a nightmare being passed from one dept to another with no one wanting responsibility, the idea that there is a team of caring people wanting to get involved is just not true.

TwistinMyMelon · 01/01/2020 07:16

Social services will get involved with a child that young being drunk, just to prepare you.

TwistinMyMelon · 01/01/2020 07:18

They will I'm afraid. Happened with my brother at a similar age and I am a doctor who has worked in A&e and we would definitely do a mash firm for this.

TwistinMyMelon · 01/01/2020 07:18

Form

Jaichangecentfoisdenom · 01/01/2020 07:21

Please, @Holdingtherope, take note of what TamingToddler and some others have said - please don't come down so hard on your daughter that she is afraid to come to you or another adult when she or one of her friends next gets into trouble. The hangover from hell should be enough punishment.
I am so sorry about your husband and your circumstances. Flowers

hopefulhalf · 01/01/2020 07:24

It wouldn't be a safeguarding issue, the hospital contacted OP who explained why no one could come and came as soon as she could.

I once cared for a 15yo who had got drunk while her DM (single parent) was away for the weekend. She collected her at midday on sunday. SS were not interested.

QOD · 01/01/2020 07:29

Oh what a night for you!
Hope she’s ok and you get some support this year 💐

Original poster
Holdingtherope · 01/01/2020 07:30

I guess safeguarding policies differ in different areas as well but I am not that hopeful that they will help

OP posts:
AlaskaElfForGin · 01/01/2020 07:31

@CareOfPunts. I'm deaf. If I'm asleep in the middle of the night, like most people are, my phone could be playing a fanfare and I wouldn't hear it. I'm not irresponsible, I have a disability.

You owe the OP an apology for your hysterical post about her 'idiot husband'.

OP I'm glad your DD is ok and you're home. Hopefully a lesson learned fur her.

IceColdCocaCola · 01/01/2020 07:34

I don't understand why OP's husband is getting so much hate here?? All the poor bloke has done is fall into a deep sleep during the night. It was a 14 year old in his care, not a 14 week old, surely he's not the first parent to have a deep sleep while there is a teenager at home??

IgnoranceIsStrength · 01/01/2020 07:38

If you do want help you can do a referral yourself. Or you can speak to the safeguarding officer at school and complete an early help referral. These vary according to the county but are then sent off to be reviewed and to identify the help needed. If the school is not an option you can complete one of these yourself. Just google safeguarding and your county and it will have documentation there. Hope you are ok today

Original poster
Holdingtherope · 01/01/2020 07:39

Ignorance - I have done twice but nothing came off it

OP posts:
SnorkMaiden81 · 01/01/2020 07:39

I'm not medically trained in any way but I'm struggling to believe all the posters saying the hospital will refuse to treat her without a guardian present.

Isn't the first remit of medical professionals to preserve and protect life or something like that?
If she'd been hit by a car on her own, would they leave her dying in admissions until mum or dad could be reached? Would they fuck.

Her friends were equally as irresponsible for drinking but I think credit needs to go to whoever sobered up enough to call an ambulance and make sure she was safe and being looked after, even though 'being spiked' as a young'un more often than not means one too many Apple Sourz.

CanIHaveADrink · 01/01/2020 07:39

Can I ask people who have issue with hearing and couldnt hear a telephone ringing at night?

Are there not some system available that will allow you to be woken up? How do you wake up in the am if an alarm can’t wake you up?
I’m surprised that, as a parent, you dint have (or there isn’t) ANOTHER system in place so you can be contactable at night.

Original poster
Holdingtherope · 01/01/2020 07:53

In 14 years, we haven’t had to have another method but we need to learn from this. A lot of my friends and her friends were pissed as well and do like a weekend drink so god knows what Weekend cover would be like

OP posts:
Soffy · 01/01/2020 07:56

I'm glad your daughter is OK. It sounds like you all have alot to deal with and you did your best to get to her as soon as ypu could.

Just ignore the MN smug brigade. There's an awful lot of 'raging and fuming ' people on here who are so busy raging and fuming they cant seem to process the facts and see that sometimes these things happen.

hopefulhalf · 01/01/2020 08:01

Speaking as someone who has been part of the treating team. Mum on a night shift, Dad seriously ill - perfectly acceptable. No one sober enough to pick up intoxicated teen - not OK at all. Dd (13) was out at a friend's house last night. I made sure I was sober so I could get her if needed.

GlendaSugarbeanIsJudgingYou · 01/01/2020 08:19

Fucking hell.

It sounds like you have enough to deal with without your DD pulling a stunt like this - which has no bearing on your ability as a parent btw - I cannot believe some of the responses you have received.

MollyButton · 01/01/2020 08:20

Lots of things get "reported" to SS, but they don't necessarily even act on those reports until they reach a certain threshold. Because they are overwhelmed.
Last time they got in contact with me (due to DC's mental health) - they chatted on the phone and then sent me details of respite care. Not really helpful.

OP are you in Scotland? That might explain why they reported to school and not SS directly.