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House porn! Ring the bell this one is a corker!

159 replies

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 12/07/2019 18:41

www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-63574254.html?utm_source=twitter&utm_medium=sharing&utm_campaign=property-details&utm_content=buying

Wowzers! I love the woodwork.

OP posts:
PrincessIsAUnicorn · 12/07/2019 21:02

OMFG!!!! I didn't see the camouflaged sink in the bathroom, also, what's with all the mirrors in said bathroom, do we really want/need to know why there are so many and in such a position?! My eyes! Wanders back to the white room 🥺

TanselleTooTall · 12/07/2019 21:06

The kitchen looks like it houses HUGE spiders. Skittle scuttle.

JoJoSM2 · 12/07/2019 21:28

I also thought it looked like a brothel (not that I've ever been to one).

If this is house porn, it's a very cringey variety...

BustedDreams · 12/07/2019 22:06

Oh my giddy aunt ...

GinkPin · 12/07/2019 22:11

Holy Mary Mother of God.

I LOVE it when the really pedestrian looking houses (on the outside) are absolutely fucking bonkers inside. I especially love the really dry estate agents description - not even a suggestion that you would be buying someone's Tudor Fantasy Acid Trip - just, 'requires modernisation' .

costacoffeecup · 12/07/2019 22:12

Wowser.

Actually I genuinely think that's quite a good buy and could be fabulous once it's been gutted and re done. I think I'd keep the four poster and the stained glass!

Bloodybridget · 12/07/2019 22:17

Good grief! I go past Roding Road quite often, not without shuddering henceforth!

Tartyflette · 12/07/2019 22:21

Well, the bathroom is actually fucking huge very spacious and, uh, umm.....
Nope, got nothing else.

Clawdy · 12/07/2019 22:21

Well, the outside is really nice......

LenoVentura · 12/07/2019 22:22

Quite a lot of mirrors in odd places brothel.

JoJoSM2 · 12/07/2019 22:23

Actually I genuinely think that's quite a good buy and could be fabulous once it's been gutted and re done

You could have the patrons knocking at the door a year or two later...

ineedaknittedhat · 12/07/2019 22:24

£800,000 for that monstrosity.

autopilotmomma · 12/07/2019 22:27

Christ on a bike...I loved it.

Then came the bar 🥴

Followed by what I can only assume is solitary confinement?????

midsomermurderess · 12/07/2019 22:40

That is one of the most depressing things I've seen in a while.

Mumsymumphy · 12/07/2019 22:44

"It’s like one of those mystery games where you have pick up certain items."
🤣🤣
The best thing about the whole house is the "will hold a full bottle of wine" wine glass next to the cooker!

Prometheus · 12/07/2019 22:46

Am I the only one thinking £800,000?????? ShockShockShockShock

Craftycorvid · 12/07/2019 22:52

Another vote for a brothel! One not updated since about 1985. 😂

Boom25 · 12/07/2019 22:54

800000 is cheap for London, would go for over a mill.once done up.

Marv1nGay3 · 12/07/2019 23:00

Is that a harmonium in picture 10?
Who on earth has one of those at home?!!

Jasharps · 12/07/2019 23:09

"Viewings can be booked 24 hours a day and an internal viewing is highly recommended"

I'll book in for the 3am slot, just to check out what's happening

JoJoSM2 · 12/07/2019 23:17

800000 is cheap for London

According to Land Registry, the average terraced house in London stands at 496k.

AppleKatie · 12/07/2019 23:20

I reckon the owner's gone into care or died as there's no chain (Sherlock eat yr heart out). It's creepy

I agree it’s creepy. I wonder if there’s no chain because it’s been confiscated as a proceed of crime?

Izzwizzo · 12/07/2019 23:27

How did I not know until now that you can buy a floral patterned bathroom sink? Can you buy a patterned bath, toilet? I am in awe of their bold choices

TheHeathenOfSuburbia · 12/07/2019 23:32

What's going on with the mantlepiece opposite the four poster bed? I can't see properly on my phone, was it nicked from a stately home or is it a trompe l'oeil thing?

missnevermind · 12/07/2019 23:36

So looking at it properly, the monks bedroom is actually attached to the bar but has no door 😳😳😳