Advice Clinic - Slatterns welcome

[pineapplebryanbrown]

Do you have problems? Is your life truly ridiculous, are you ridiculous? Please step inside our fully staffed advice clinic and we will cure all your ills. We have a clap nurse standing by for more intimate problems, don't be shy.

No! I've nearly eaten the whole bag!

Do you have beer? It says they should be eaten with beer.

project well its a rule in academia...I do have a slight inkling that its not the way the rest of the world works...but thats one of the main reasons I am keen to remain in academia.

Lone we need either a picture of your foodstuff or a description!

Hmm, do you reckon beer would cure my stinged taste buds?

Dangly can you still not see it? I sent it again. Hell.. I'm eating hell.

Ah i'm with you now! Yes i've had that experience! Was hot! It nearly put me off my wine but didn't.

Pity I have no self control

‘I’m eating Hell’

I’m so using that at work.

I no longer eat anything above a mild korma in case I accidentally lose weight and miss out on the possibility of a flick knife fight.

Proj I so wanted to mention T4 and the lorries but I've been banned before.

Why do you all get lost? Just AS me and click your red shoes.

I'm eating marzipan but my fingers taste of garlic....

Naked congratz on promotion

Are you a fifth columnist?

Have you really??

I have hung around here for 10+ years but am so inoffensive no one has ever noticed. You are the only people who know about my rage.

lol

Leftover cherry pie and cold custard, out of a jug.

I got banned for trolling a trans thread once....I mean that implies I was actively trying to wind people up...which I wasn't...but hey.

Yes I was banned for complaining about dog rehoming policies - never tussle with the dog people

Plus was pissed and probz threw a few cunts around.

It’s so important to detract the ‘cunts’ from the sentiment

Wolf self control and self improvement are not in Thighland lexicon.

I was going to suggest that theatregoers be squeezed through a cut-out shape, like checking bag size at the airport, and any that didn't fit would drop through a hatch and be burned as an energy supply for the theatre. But I feared the holocaust comparisons.

Detach? I should probably stop drinking wine now

Is it really though? I think it adds gravitas.

I liked the blow up seat fight suggestion

I'm just boring the fuck out of the thread with facts from the scientific literature....

Its kinda my MO.

Mengele could stand at the theatre entrance directing people to fat, non fat seats. They'll have to dig him up for the second time though.

The dog people are as mad as the cat people. I look at the dog threads sometimes and marvel.

Also the childrens book threads. So many parents censoring their children's reading in case a book makes them sad. I read a whole thread once about whether Goodnight Mr Tom could do lasting damage. WTAF?