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Original poster

What secrets do you have from your DH?

143 replies

DirtyDennis · 28/03/2019 10:13

I have a couple of really dull secrets that I keep from DH

First, DH doesn't know I'm on MN (been here for 6 years). I had a dream last night that my DH caught me on MN. I woke up in a cold sweat like I'd been caught out in an affair Blush
He wouldn't care, I think he'd just think it's a bit weird because we don't have children and he'd assume MN is for parents.

Second, I have a secret email account that I use for complaining to companies about shoddy products or service. DH is a really relaxed person and never lets anything get to him or phase him but I'm kind of up-tight and actually find it quite cathartic to voice my complaints about really mundane things. Grin

A friend was recently telling me that for the last few years she's told her DH that she goes to yoga on a Wednesday evening but she doesn't - she goes to an art gallery for a wander around then has a coffee and cake before jogging home (to look sweaty). Again, he wouldn't care but it's been too long now to tell him the truth Grin

Tell me what weird and completely inane secrets you've got from your DH...

OP posts:
WhatNowRandy · 28/03/2019 10:23

I ate the chocolate from the cupboard yesterday? I'm not sure it counts as a secret, as I'm not sure he even knew it was there...

I'm sure there's all kinds of random stuff that he doesn't know about, just because it's never come up. Mostly no secrets that are secrets on purpose.

He doesn't know my closest friend's (who he also kind of knows) MH struggles and horrific abuse past, because that's not my secret to share with anyone, so I guess I'm keeping that from him?

He also doesn't know how obsessively I'm following my sort-of-ex's court case and any news articles about him crimes. He knows the broad strokes, but it feels like "talking about my ex", and I'm quite embarrassed about how involved I feel in it. I wouldn't lie about it though, if he asked.

WhatNowRandy · 28/03/2019 10:24

Sorry, I just realised not all of that was inane and maybe not in the spirit you intended! Blush I came to write about the chocolate, and got carried away...

MrsPerfect12 · 28/03/2019 10:27

I don't deliberately keep any secrets from my husband but might probably don't share everything but I wouldn't count that as a secret.

Where your friend is concerned that is lying and I would be extremely hurt if that was my DH. I wouldn't be able to believe there wasn't more to it as it's a pointless lie.

icanhearapindrop · 28/03/2019 10:30

I drove somewhere an hour away to buy a present for my DD, because it wasn’t in stock locally. It’s something she really wants, and he might think I was being a bit silly, but wouldn’t actually mind me doing it, but I just told him I’d been shopping locally and stopped for a coffee. I’m not really sure why! But if he looks at our bank statement he’ll see where I went anyway, so I didn’t plan it very well Smile

mellongoose · 28/03/2019 10:36

That I have a secret habit for McDonald's breakfasts. Probably 2 or 3 a week Blush

I do intend to kick it at some point soon!

Malibucyprus · 28/03/2019 10:38

He sent me out for rabbit food on Sunday, and I couldn't be bothered to drive into town for the fancy nuggets that the fine mouthed little buggers sweethearts prefer. So I drove to the corner shop, got bog standard rabbit food, and a coffee, sat in the car for 40 mins, then drove home announcing that I couldn't find their usual food, so this would have to do.

Bluntness100 · 28/03/2019 10:39

I really don't have any.

MachineBee · 28/03/2019 10:42

I have a secret MaccyD habit too. Especially the McMuffins but without a yucky egg. He hates McDonalds so I just go along with his opinion when out together and looking for breakfast when out.

But when I’m with my DDs or driving to an early meeting I schedule a McMuffin stop into my travel plans if possible.

Whichhouseisbest · 28/03/2019 10:42

None really apart from I can be a bit evasive when it comes to how much I have spent on the children at birthdays and Christmas. Also I don't tell him how much junk food I eat or how much I weigh 🙈

LittleScottish · 28/03/2019 10:49

I drunkenly shagged his best mate, shortly before we got married. We still see a lot of him, and nearly 15 years on, it's still hard to look the mate in the eye.

I also do a lot of secret eating.

And I watch porn.

cheezy · 28/03/2019 10:53

That I’ve had Botox in the past Blush

BlueMerchant · 28/03/2019 10:55

On my day off after the school run I go into town, buy a nice sandwich for lunch and a mag or new book and come home and chill on the bed. OH thinks I go on a walk round the local forest with our dog when in reality the furthest pup's been is round the block- or in the gardenBlush.

Chocolateisfab · 28/03/2019 10:59

That I had a massive crush on a dj in a club I regularly went to.
Mid 40's ffs!!

Malibucyprus · 28/03/2019 11:01

Cheezy just reminded me of another, he knows I have botox but doesn't realise how much I spend on other face treatments. I tend to half everything if he asks Wink he can't really be that bothered though, he'd only need to google it to realise I'm lying!

And besides, it's just the same as when he comes home from the pub and halves how many pints he's had Grin

livefornaps · 28/03/2019 11:05

That he doesn't exist

Pengrin · 28/03/2019 11:09

I really don't have any.

Great contribution Grin

I have a secret savings account.

I had a job he didn’t know about whilst we were dating, still doesn’t.

His best friend tried to kiss me.

I’ll watch really trashy tv whilst he’s away and he’ll think I’m working.

I once had a night out in a different city with a friend. We got drunk and ended up on a coach to Cardiff (a long way away).

DerelictWreck · 28/03/2019 11:12

drunkenly shagged his best mate, shortly before we got married. We still see a lot of him, and nearly 15 years on, it's still hard to look the mate in the eye.

Woah. I'm not sure that cheating on your fiance with their best mate counts as inane!

TheFlis12345 · 28/03/2019 11:15

Two of our mutual friends had an affair and DH has no idea. I know he would be very disappointed in them, so have never told him.

AmIBU123 · 28/03/2019 11:23

Another secret McMuffin lover here and accompanied by a sweet latte.

That I masturbate... Like, we've never said it's something couples shouldn't do but when he asked I said no because, well I don't know actually. I do it in private of course so I guess it makes sense to me to keep it private...

I keep quiet how much some things cost.

There's probably more...

Stuckandsad · 28/03/2019 11:23

That I used to work as a foot fetish model 🙈

December2018 · 28/03/2019 11:26

How much I really spend on eBay, usually on shite... It's a race for the postman most mornings 😂
And how much I actually paid for our tv... if he found out he would probably shrivel up, we had a perfectly good tv but I just had a mad moment online and before I could think about what I was doing it was ordered 😂

MrsKipling1980 · 28/03/2019 11:32

I bought us both a small box of mini eggs each a few weeks ago but got peckish & ate them both. Got busted though when he saw the empty boxes in the recycling bin lol.

I don't keep secrets as DH gives me no reason to do so. Growing up my mum kept lots of secrets from my step dad & I always told myself I wouldn't have a relationship like that.

EastMidsGPs · 28/03/2019 11:32

30+ years in he still doesn't know I cannot stand The Beatles.

LittleScottish · 28/03/2019 11:35

I missed the inane bit! It just felt good to tell my secret anonymously...

KeptTheBeachesShipwreckFree · 28/03/2019 11:36

That I have a fisheye lens! He bought me a wide-angle attachment thing for the front of an ordinary lens but the image quality and the green/purple fringing around the edges are awful so I secretly bought the real thing 2nd hand for £125. I've had it 2 years now. I only use it when he's not there.

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