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Original poster

What secrets do you have from your DH?

143 replies

DirtyDennis · 28/03/2019 10:13

I have a couple of really dull secrets that I keep from DH

First, DH doesn't know I'm on MN (been here for 6 years). I had a dream last night that my DH caught me on MN. I woke up in a cold sweat like I'd been caught out in an affair Blush
He wouldn't care, I think he'd just think it's a bit weird because we don't have children and he'd assume MN is for parents.

Second, I have a secret email account that I use for complaining to companies about shoddy products or service. DH is a really relaxed person and never lets anything get to him or phase him but I'm kind of up-tight and actually find it quite cathartic to voice my complaints about really mundane things. Grin

A friend was recently telling me that for the last few years she's told her DH that she goes to yoga on a Wednesday evening but she doesn't - she goes to an art gallery for a wander around then has a coffee and cake before jogging home (to look sweaty). Again, he wouldn't care but it's been too long now to tell him the truth Grin

Tell me what weird and completely inane secrets you've got from your DH...

OP posts:
Ihateworking · 28/03/2019 18:38

My big secret.. Is that I had genital herpes a few years before we got together. I still have very occasional flare ups of it but when I do I tell him on on my period, have never given it to him. I suppose really it's not that big of a deal but after 11 years together I feel if I said anything that he would think I'd caught it recently!!!

EastMidsGPs · 28/03/2019 18:44

Discussing this thread with friend today and she reminded me of when she started going to the gym at the local leisure centre. New kit, new trainers, lots of enthusiasm. However, after a couple of weeks she got into the habit of only getting as far as the centre's café. Having a coffee and cake and then going home.
Her DH worked for the local council. There had been an audit and during this it had been discovered that customers were not being given receipts - so the CCTV was checked. Checked by her DH's team 😉 .... and so her saw her on tape buying cake and coffee, eating it and then leaving the building.
Bypassing the gym on the way!Grin

CakeNinja · 28/03/2019 18:56

Quite a few people with secret sex toys Shock
What do you think your dps/dhs would say if they knew? Mine knows about mine, they’re not a secret! Just seems like a strange thing to keep a secret when it’s (as far as I thought!!) quite normal!

KateGrey · 28/03/2019 19:15

My dh was rooting in the wardrobe the other day and I’m sure he’d have seen it. I think for him it would be a bit of an ego blow. He’d assume it was a choice between a sex toy and him (he lacks confidence in some areas). And it’s just not something we’ve ever really talked about.

Blackandpurple · 28/03/2019 19:18

I don’t have secrets from him.

I just don't tell him stuff.

Huge difference.

FrangipaniBlue · 28/03/2019 19:19

That I'm a wierdo who eats oxo cubes and Nutella from the jar with a spoon.

That's about it !

SecretMoi · 28/03/2019 19:25

That I had two terminations when I was in my teens; he's completely anti-abortion so wouldn't understand.
How many sexual partners I've had, he knows roughly but not exactly (it's very low - single digits, but I'm his only one).
How much I have in savings - he'd have it spent if he knew.

CakeNinja · 28/03/2019 19:27

Thanks for explaining Kate, obviously none of my business and hope I didn’t come across as being rude! Didn’t really consider that about the ego, it does kind of make sense now.

teyem · 28/03/2019 19:28

Nothing. It's not that I'm very principled, I'm just shit at keeping my mouth shut.

Bananasarenottheonlyfruit · 28/03/2019 19:42

Loads! But the ones that come to mind from reading the thread:

That the first person I slept with was nearly 20 years older than me, and a former teacher of mine. Nothing happened until I left school, but it was still a bit dodgy!

That sometimes when I am meant to be doing housework type activities, I sit and play on my son's Xbox.

He does know I have genital herpes, but he thinks I first had an outbreak when pregnant, but it was actually about a year earlier, when we had been together for 2-3 years. So, either way, we don't know who gave it to who, because he has only ever knowingly had one outbreak about 8 years later, when under huge stress.

Absolutepowercorrupts · 28/03/2019 19:45

blackandpurple
I agree with you, I don't have secrets from my DH, there is nothing in my life or my past I would be unhappy with him knowing about.
I don't tell him things because he's the biggest gossip I know. If I'm told something and asked to keep it a secret I'll never tell anyone especially not him

nombrecambio · 28/03/2019 19:54

That I bought 4 jumpers and a dress this morning... he'll find out eventually... one item of clothing at a time.

He's not financially controlling. I have two double wardrobes and a massive chest of drawers of clothes ... he thinks I should have a clear out but I think "what if I need to dress up as BeWitched at a fancy dress party"!

SimonJT · 28/03/2019 20:01

The holiday we were going on together to disney paris was organised and paid for by my ex boyfriend, so I could see his band play.

Our flat doesn’t have a no pet clause (he is desperate for a dog).

How many people I’ve had sex with.

I dislike the only meal he cooks.

Our lease doesn’t come up for renewal in April (dumped him, so it has pushed him to find a new place to live in four days, bingo).

CakeNinja · 28/03/2019 20:10

Oh, and dp doesn’t know how many people I’ve had sex with. It’s not something I’ve kept back as a ‘secret’ as such, more that it’s not something he’d want to know about and I’m the same, no inclination to know how many people he’s slept with before he met me either.
I don’t tell him lots of stuff, partly because I don’t see him much (despite living with him!) and partly because he actually can’t keep a bloody secret!! Also, he’s not massively into small talk, I tell my girl friends way more stuff than I tell him (chit chat wise).

Chocolateisfab · 28/03/2019 20:30

Oh hell no way does dh know how many men I have slept with!!
Or how much I paid for our ddog!

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 28/03/2019 20:31

I don't like surprises. Sometimes, when DH is proposing watching a new film, I will secretly read the plot in advance on Wikipedia so I know what to expect. I would never tell him this because he would be genuinely gutted and appalled.

emilybrontescorsett · 28/03/2019 20:40

Dp doesn't know that my friend's husband was already married when she met him.
He also doesn't know how much carp I tolerated from my ex h, I'm too embarrassed to admit I put up with it.

TurquoiseLagoon · 28/03/2019 20:40

I have a secret twix habit. If I'm heading anywhere at all by myself, getting petrol, I'll buy a twix. They're not even that nice but it's a habit 🤷‍♀️ I used to buy chocolate hobnobs but I'd genuinely eat a pack in a day and they're harder to hide Grin
I'm trying now to put the money I would have spent on a twix and pay it off my cred card. That makes it sound like I could buy ten grands worth of twixes, I probably couldn't. But every little helps.

EllebellyBeeblebrox · 28/03/2019 20:55

I secretly watched the last in series 3 of Line of Duty without him. I couldn't help it!

I have a crush on one of the school dads.

On a less lighthearted note I've got debts he doesn't know about. Totally ashamed but we've had so many rows about money I can't bare the thought of bringing it all up again :(

bsc · 29/03/2019 10:49

How many people I've slept with. (He's never asked in 25 years, btw, so I don't think he's too bothered one way or another!)

bsc · 29/03/2019 10:54

He doesn't know my colleague is in love with me...

bsc · 29/03/2019 10:59

He doesn't know I voted remain, when he voted leave... Grin

WFTisgoingoninmyhead · 29/03/2019 11:05

We own our own business and I do the finances and for 15 years I have earned more money than him. He would not care if he found out as all our money is pooled together in the end, but I started it when he pissed me off years ago and got used to that extra £100 a monthGrin

BlueMerchant · 29/03/2019 13:20

Money thread has just reminded me..
I inherited a lot of money from a family member. I told OH I had inherited half the amount I actually did.
I haven't told him as I know what he's like and he would start expecting me to pay for everything.

TimeIhadaNameChange · 29/03/2019 15:51

I know that one of his colleagues has a much larger take-home pay than he does, despite DP being the more senior. But the colleague does a lot of overtime which DP refuses to do (within his rights) and it all adds up. I think DP would be marginally pissed off if he knew.