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Original poster

What secrets do you have from your DH?

143 replies

DirtyDennis · 28/03/2019 10:13

I have a couple of really dull secrets that I keep from DH

First, DH doesn't know I'm on MN (been here for 6 years). I had a dream last night that my DH caught me on MN. I woke up in a cold sweat like I'd been caught out in an affair
He wouldn't care, I think he'd just think it's a bit weird because we don't have children and he'd assume MN is for parents.

Second, I have a secret email account that I use for complaining to companies about shoddy products or service. DH is a really relaxed person and never lets anything get to him or phase him but I'm kind of up-tight and actually find it quite cathartic to voice my complaints about really mundane things.

A friend was recently telling me that for the last few years she's told her DH that she goes to yoga on a Wednesday evening but she doesn't - she goes to an art gallery for a wander around then has a coffee and cake before jogging home (to look sweaty). Again, he wouldn't care but it's been too long now to tell him the truth

Tell me what weird and completely inane secrets you've got from your DH...

OP posts:

ooooohbetty · 30/03/2019 14:34

Your 'secrets' are strange. They aren't anything that he particularly needs to know about. Also so what if he knew you were on here? Why would it matter if he thought it was weird? Same with the email complaining. Very odd imo.

Keener · 30/03/2019 14:46

I don't get a lot of these, either -- apart from the ones where people are miserably married to abusive men and saving to escape, why on earth would you conceal your savings or spending on clothes or whatever? It's your money, assuming the household in general isn't teetering on the verge of bankruptcy while you go mad on shoes/books/Botox/pick'n'mix...

Gibble, why are you concealing from your DH that you're saving to pay his mother back?

RomanyQueen1 · 30/03/2019 15:10

I don't understand the secret porn and wanks tbh, why can't you be up front about it?

SwimmingKaren · 30/03/2019 15:11

Oof several affairs, huge debt, the usual stuff.

notacooldad · 30/03/2019 15:16

I cant think of any.
Nothing has been deliberately witheld. We discuss things as they come up.
No affairs, no debt, no gambling etc.
Everything has ticked over ok on the whole for the last 30 years.

Pinkruler · 30/03/2019 15:25

Keener and Oohbetty I think the idea of the thread from the OPs point of view was that it should be lighthearted! That there are things you keep secret just because.

lms2017 · 30/03/2019 15:28

That each week we need more washing powder on the food shopping at £10 a pop .... really this buys my horse is nice comfy bale of bedding a week !!! he refuses to pay towards my horses which is fine ... but I have to buy his luxuries out the food shop each week , I don't have treats so this is mine hehehe ... ( I am sure he must know) x

daphine2004 · 30/03/2019 16:17

That I reversed his car into a wall (slowly) but there doesn’t appear to be any damage. This comes after scrapping the underside on a high kerb - I didn’t tell him that either.

I don’t drive it anymore as I hate it!

tinkywinkyshandbag · 30/03/2019 16:24

I love the fact that it's a Saturday wank.

ooooohbetty · 30/03/2019 17:25

Ok @pinkruler. I keep secret from my OH that I often flick the v's at him behind his back because he's v annoying. He has no idea.

Chocolate1984 · 30/03/2019 18:00

He doesn't know I got £40,000 inheritance when my great aunt died. It's in my secret bank account.

Chocolateisfab · 30/03/2019 18:06

Wilberforce my exh never knew I slept with his db. Twice.

mollyblack · 30/03/2019 18:29

Seriously gutted that I shared the inheritances I have come in to. If i get any further money I will be hiding it.

Similar to some here-
I have one day off a week- 6 hours child free, i always say "housework and errands" when asked what i have done- that is true but usually only for an hour or so. I also lie in bed and read, get coffee, sometimes a cheeky mcdonalds. In the past when i have been straight up dh has felt he should also get a "free" day. But he sits on his arse doing bugger all every weekend and evening as it is.

MulticolourMophead · 30/03/2019 19:13

Also keeping from him that I'm actually leaving him next week he'll get a shock when he comes home from work and no ones home

I did this, with the DCs. My anxiety was sky high waiting for texts from him around the time he'd be home. It was the only way I'd ever get to leave.

I inherited a lot of money from a family member. I told OH I had inherited half the amount I actually did.
I haven't told him as I know what he's like and he would start expecting me to pay for everything.

I kept money hidden from my ex. It was my escape fund, but if he knew I had money, he'd find ways to use it on the house while making sure I was never on the deeds.

MulticolourMophead · 30/03/2019 19:20

captainkangaroo If you're married you won't be leaving with nothing, you'd be entitled to a share of the assets, it'll just be a while before you get it, though.

Nearer the time you plan to leave, ppost on the Relationships Board, the ladies there will be able to give you advice and pointers on getting out safely, and how to organise getting your ducks in a row.

Best of luck x

EggysMom · 30/03/2019 19:38

Secret wanker here! Perhaps we should form a club ....

DH doesn't know that I occasionally exchange emails with my first ever serious boyfriend. It's nothing sordid, just a need to keep in touch with my past (I have schoolfriends publicly on FB for the same reason).

Mrslouislou · 30/03/2019 19:43

My DH doesn’t know that when we go to his DM’s house, when neither of them are looking, I clean little bits of the house because it’s utterly despicably revolting!!

Di11y · 30/03/2019 21:32

my dh doesn't know that I massively regret marrying because i resent picking up the slack of his poor mental health and he's not the man I fell in love with.

I love him though, it's not his fault and we have 2 girls so 🤷‍♀️

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