Live parking thread - cheeky fucking builders!

[TinselAndKnickers]

So my neighbours are getting work done again, and as usual they haven't told us (yesterday the work started at 6:30am but that's another story) and today I have gone out ready for my day to see a big fuck off lorry blocking my drive. Knocked on next door. No answer. Fence between us so not like I can even just use their drive to get out!

Crappy diagram attached.

FUMING

Lean on the horn

is there a cafe nearby? they are probably having a fry up lunch...

Grabs popcorn.....

Is the lorry sign writed?

phone number on the van?
do you have your neighbours phone no?

Does it have a company name on it?

is the lorry unlocked? Get in and lean on it's horn

What kind of knock? You need to beat that door like a heavy metal drum!

Take photos, is the company on FB?

Lean over back fence in case they are working in the kitchen?

This is where my old Volvo used to come in handy.

A Bentley ran into it whilst it was parked.

Volvo not a scratch or dent

Bentley written off.

I would have used it as a bartering ram

I've just noticed the tiny writing on your diagram on side of offending vehicle
BIG FUCK OFF LORRY

settling in. Love the diagram BTW.

No number on the van - generic one. Have not got the neighbours number but I have even gone as far as to shout through the letterbox "helloooo?!"

@greenelephantscarf there is a McDonalds, KFC, Pizza Hut, and Burger King at the retail park 10 minute walk away. If I wasn't so lazy I might investigate

Log the reg on iparklikeatwat. ...

Wish I had a Volvo battering ram. I have a bruised little fiesta

Omg cheeky fuckery of the highest level I’d be ducking fuming

Any chance the van is unlocked and you could release the handbrake and push it forward? Then hide it on them

Fucking

If they are blocking your dropped curb, call the police. It's a road traffic offence. If the police refuse to come out, tell them there may be a breach of the peace if the lorry isn't moved.

Call the police over an abandoned vehicle or call KFC, Mc Donald’s etc saying if the owner doesn’t come to move their vehicle immediately you will smash the window to gain entry and let off the handbrake.

They are not to know you aren’t going to do that. Although people take one look at me and think I would.

Climb on the bonnet of the van, grab a book and chill. Careful not to do any damage though.

call the greasy spoons and tell them a lorry is on fire

can you call the neighbours? get them on facebook? go around and hammer on their door? ( not a polite British knock but a huge ass fucken bailiffs hammering thud thud thud)

Call the police.