If mumsnet was a diagram (lighthearted)

[BobbyGentry]

Sooooo... in my ‘if Mumsnet was a diagram’ (taking only a few minutes to draw and even less time to think about.)

There’d be a parking war between Morison’s, Ocado & Sainsbury’s delivery vans on LTB Street.

There’d be a quiet, warm and inviting 24hrs bookshop, 24hrs Costa Coffee for a lively chat and a really elaborate wedding shop.

The radical exclusionary feminists, across the road at number 10, wouldn’t be willing to share the toilet with EricA yet again so they’d all be kicking off.

A prep school for children aged 3 + (put you name down at birth or attend the local comp with better results.)

How about you?

Lots I’ve probably forgotten but first things that sprang to mind.

((((Hope to make you smile))))

Are there P&C spaces?

I hope the prep school only accepts children with suitably middle-class names like Charlotte, Isabella, Sebastian and Rufus.

@Gobblersknob The P&C spaces are located road the corner on the Sponsored thread road round the corner but were full so that’s why the delivery vans got into such a scuffle.

@LuckyLou7 I am happy to report, by Year Two, Charlotte, Isabella, Sebastian and Rufus all made the netball tryouts; their nannies seemed really pleased.

You're after diagram praise, aren't you OP

Where is Excessive Cleaning Dressed Up As Normal Hygiene Street?

And Why Would You Take the Chance Street?

Op can you add directions to the exclusive shop full of gin ,Pom bears,cutted up pears & naice ham please?

@halfwitpicker always 🤣😅😇

Oh and an old fashioned telephone box that only dials direct to 111 or 101

Also you need a street with a huge wall. On one side of the wall are all the children who are 17 years and 364 days old. They are Still Children and must be supervised at all times and never asked to take responsibility. On the other side of the wall is everyone who is 18 and over. They should be living independently and if you so much as throw a couple of pairs of jeans in the washing machine for them or make them a cup of tea, you are enabling them into being life long layabouts.

There should be an A&E with an equal amount of people being shoved in against their will, as people being soundly beaten for daring to waste NHS time.

Also, a shop selling extraordinarily expensive handbags, with boycotting protesters outside.

And a Boden.

There would be a lovely community centre full of comfy sofas covered with woolly hugs. There would be tea and coffee and lemon drizzle cake.

What about a street of houses with no front door bells or letterboxes? And phones that don't accept incoming calls. That would solve all the angst over inappropriate times to knock on the door, and associated non-opening.

@treaclesoda The Cleaning Dressed Up As Normal Hygiene Street goods are being delivered by the Sainsbury’s van but due to the Ocado van unable to move ‘cause of the standoff with the Morison’s van there’ll be an unforeseen delay. They’re offering a free coupon as recompense for inconveniences caused which is something.

@WatcherOfTheNight - could gin, pom bears, cutted up pears, & naive ham be by mail order perhaps? (eBay & PayPal accepted)

Where's the Shit Hot Lawyer and his office advertising 30 minutes free advice?

At the far end of the street is a little stream with a bridge over it.
The Trolls live under this bridge.

I assume there's more dropped kerbs than raised ones?

end that is my version of MN as well.
Woolly hugs, with a few friendly vipers peeping out :)

Got to be one house where they leave the Christmas decs up all year

Ooh and another where someone is frothing because I wrote decs instead of decorations...

A shop selling loo brushes?

Got to be one house where they leave the Christmas decs up all year
and the lights are flashing blue ones, to add insult to injury.

@endofthelinefinally lemon drizzle cake & wooly hugs sounds infinitely better than Costa.

@treaclesoda please notice (to your relief) that no doorbells, phones that accept incoming calls or door knobs were represented in this diagram.

@Gobblersknob perhaps that why the Sponsored thread road P&C parking spaces are so full? Boycotts, handbags, gladrags & A.E - what a night to remember or not remember hiccup sigh

Is the woman that owns the wedding shop the one who used sex lube and a fish slice?????

@Luckylou7 Where's the Shit Hot Lawyer and his office advertising 30 minutes free advice? Are you referring to EricA, think she’s busy waiting for the loo but @NorksAreMessy, she’ll be sure to check for the brush when she’s done ☺️

Where are the penguin bollards?

@Thingywhatsit that’s what I heard blush

OP I think you have a bright future ahead of you in urban planning.