UPDATED diagram
Sooooo... in my ‘if Mumsnet was a diagram’ (taking only around 26 minutes, this time, to draw and incorporate all the wonderful mumsnet ideas.)
There’d be a parking war between Morrisons, Ocado & Sainsbury’s delivery vans on LTB Street.
There’d be a quiet, warm and inviting 24hrs bookshop, 24hrs Costa Coffee for a lively chat and a really elaborate wedding shop.
The rad exclusionary feminists, across the road at number 10, wouldn’t be willing to share the toilet with EricA yet again so they’d all be kicking off.
A prep school for children aged 3 + (put you name down at birth or attend the local comp with better results.)
@GobblersKnob P&C spaces are located road the corner on the Sponsoredthreadroad round the corner but were full so that’s why the delivery vans got into such a scuffle. ✔
@LuckyLou7 The suitably middle-class named Charlotte, Isabella, Sebastian and Rufus all made the netball tryouts; their nannies seemed really pleased, at the local prep school ✔
@treaclesoda Excessive Cleaning Dressed Up As Normal Hygiene Street ✔
@WatcherOfTheNight an old fashioned telephone box that only dials direct to 111 or 101 √
@treaclesoda Also you need a street with a huge wall. On one side of the wall are all the children who are 17 years and 364 days old. They are Still Children and must be supervised at all times and never asked to take responsibility. On the other side of the wall is everyone who is 18 and over. They should be living independently and if you so much as throw a couple of pairs of jeans in the washing machine for them or make them a cup of tea, you are enabling them into being life long layabouts.✔
@GobblersKnob There should be an A&E with an equal amount of people being shoved in against their will, as people being soundly beaten for daring to waste NHS time. Also, a shop selling extraordinarily expensive handbags, with boycotting protesters outside. And a Boden. ✔
@endofthelinefinally & @NorksAreMessy There would be a lovely community centre full of comfy sofas covered with woolly hugs. There would be tea and coffee and lemon drizzle cake. ✔
@LuckyLou7 the Shit Hot Lawyer and his office advertising 30 minutes free advice ✔
@BreakfastAtSquiffanys At the far end of the street is a little stream with a bridge over it.The Trolls live under this bridge.I assume there's more dropped kerbs than raised ones? ✔
@Corneliusmurphy Got to be one house where they leave the Christmas decs up all year. Ooh and another where someone is frothing because I wrote decs instead of decorations... @LuckyLou7Got to be one house where they leave the Christmas decs up all yearand the lights are flashing blue ones, to add insult to injury. ✔
@NorksAreMessy A shop selling loo brushes ✔
@Thingywhatsit The woman that owns the wedding shop is one who used sex lube and a fish slice ✔
@LadyMonicaBaddingham penguin bollards outside A&E to stop road rammers ✔
@treaclesoda A bright future ahead of you in urban planning
@CottonTailRabbit The bakery has a problem with cake punching ✔
@SheWoreBlueVelvet There’s definitely a massive University that everyone is required to attend. They will shag future famous people and learn the value of critical thing and free speech.Interestingly it will be right next to “ Leavers Getto” the rough bit. With it’s albeit smaller than reported number of uneducated racist and just plain stupid tenants. @treaclesoda I sincerely hope that's Russell Group university. Or at the very least a red brick university. ✔
@CottonTailRabbit There’s an underground preppers bunker filled with canned goods and UHT milk.✔
@LuckyLou7 The Rad Fem, the builder has done a massive shit but not sure the poo troll knows yet.✔
@TSSDNCOP A pond with a row of ducks.✔
@MrsMoastyToasty bins get put out every second Wednesday. There a CF NDN who polices bins/parking/boundary disputes.✔
@GobblersKnob The childminder with the massive dog lives at number 12. ✔
@Patroclus Have I ever experienced this>No--> It cant have happened.✔
@NoTeaNoShadeNoPinkLemonade ocado and morrisons are the same van in different wrapping, meaning they're in on it together lol ✔
@GobblersKnob The delivery vans are stuck because all the drivers need a poo and no mnetter will let them sully their pristine loo.✔
@LuckyLou7 There’s a sofa in someone's front garden with a CF sitting on it smoking weed and drinking Tennant's Extra. The phone box to log it with 101 is down the street so not logged yet. ✔
@steppemum well, I read the title asIf mn was a diaphragm, which says it all really! There’s a well dodge diaphragm street which should be avoided at night at all costs. ✔
@Smurfybubbles There’s a corner for all the naughty MIL's ✔
@JanuarySnowdrops There’s Zoflora shop? ✔
@CriticalConditionThere are plenty of hedges for people to have sex in. ✔
@NorksAreMessy A big EXIT gate for flouncers...with seating and spotlighting so that we can all applaud them as they go ✔
@waywardfruit There’s a HR department, scaffolding and a large tree that needs to be cut down and have a TPO put on it at the same time.And a branch ofGreggsLush.✔
@knockknockknock a spa for everyone to have a spa day when they're having a shit time in life as it cures everything.✔
*@CottonTailRabbit*The butchers sells those magical chickens that feed a family of 4 for a week.✔
@DeathyMcDeathStarFace There has a be a second school, slightly further away, where the only subject taught is grammar pedantry for 12 hours a day.✔
@DeathyMcDeathStarFace Asda delivers regularly to diaphragm alley ✔
reeeeallly need to work now thank you for making me smile!