Hilarious FB stealth boasts

[lovelyjubilly]

'I feel so guilty! I have taken my children out doing fun activities every day of the summer holidays so far for the past 3 weeks and today we are having a day at home. I feel so bad that they're going to be bored! Anyone else feeling guilty about having a day at home?'

Any other gems?

A new one today. Someone on my facebook who is definitely a narcissist. She has been to a wedding and got a selfie with the bride. She is slightly in front of the bride and she has touched up HER OWN face... got the abnormally large eyes like a cartoon bambi and her nose is almost invisible from filter... bride looks lovely and normal but a bit weird in contrast. #fairytales #beautifulbride #makingmemories #keepingitnatural

🤢🤢🤢

I have a neighbour who constantly posts about her ‘gorg hubs’ #lovethatman #bestboy constantly . Two nights ago we had “champagne at midnight in the hot tub with my gorgeous man after getting back from Antigua “. #jetlag #bestlife etc etc .

Unfortunately she forgets she’s got a voice like a corncrake , and his carries when he shouts too . So if you’re going to have an alcohol fuelled screaming match at each other at midnight in a tiny village , EVERYONE is going to hear every single invective . Much eye rolling in the village went on at that .

I've had one today on my feed; person has just had a baby some days ago today they posted about how it should have been their wedding day but the cancelled just incase baby went overdue

Fair enough you think...then the post continues to explain how they also wanted their daughter at their wedding and fit in to a size 10 dress.

Umm ok so far I'm on board , I get it. But then this corker was added on the end;

But we could have had our cake and eaten it because she is here and I fit back in to a size 10 easily..

Well done love, well done, congrats on that "snap back" lol

"Petrol tank chicken" got to get your kicks somehow 😂

Mlm on mine
Can anyone recommend private schools
Mortgage brokers etc etc
Even live streamed coming home and finding her house broken into and all her designer shoes Rolex watches etc taken. Questions since whether they have been returned are ignored.

Where’s best to buy diamond tennis necklaces / bracelets for babies.

Today she posts a video of her child playing in its room except it was 2 seconds of the child and the rest panning the camera round the room to show what stuff they have the bed perfectly made and so on

Oh! I've just sssn one! Kids playing in tiny corner of pic, and very beautiful, massive garden complete with treehouse/climbing frame- "hey everyone, check out our amazing garden!"

Though obviously it doesn't say that! It is apparently a pic of the kids playing!

This might need a whole new thread but what’s with the inspirational memes? Especially the ones about getting over issues and heartache and getting fifty “u ok hun?” comments....

Oh so THIS. I bile in my mouth every time I read that expression.

Not a stealth boaster but I have one who frequently posts photos of days out with DC with captions about 'making another healthy deposit into the most important account in the world...the memory bank'. It's cringe-worthy.

No stealth boasters on my fb, just open boasters

I'm sure I read that people find stealth boasting more annoying than plain old boasting 🤔.

I don't get this, why are some people even on FB if they don't like what they see or their friends updates?
I like seeing what everyone's up to, it's for sharing what's going on in your life. It doesn't mean it's boasting if you therefore do.

"Ooo I'm so nervous, this is the first time I'm taking the kids to our apartment in Spain for the ENTIIIRE holidays! Poor (husband's name) stuck at home working (sad face). Wish me LUUUUUUCK everyone!"And some people actually did wish her luck. Because, you know, having the kids running around an apartment in Spain, and the communal pool, instead of in the 5 bed detached, is such a hardship.

Sometimes it's not always about money and holidays. I can understand this post - you see "oh yeah, poor her, going on holiday, what's she moaning for?" - maybe she's nervous taking her kids on holiday abroad by herself? Anxiety's a real thing, could be be that but it's not something you can physically see for the gossip mongers and critics to pick up on.

I came off FB because of all this crap. The worse was the 'proud mamma' who photographed everything her daughter did with long explanantions. It really was toe curlingly cringe.

Need to place mark to have a read later..good thread op

same person as pp-will put i cant take it anymore then cue alll the huns oh no whats wrong

nothing i dont want to say on here

then stfu!

This made me look through my fb feed and I think everyone is genuine. Lots of posts of holidays, a level results but never anything stealthy, just openly happy or proud. Mind you my feed is mostly made up of animal rescue posts and cats being dickheads

Not FB but a woman swimming today...
"Oh my son is going to be a safety inspector when he is older" the reason? He apparently read out a safety notice regarding footwear in full then corrected the man on reception as it SHOULD SAY "OUTERSHOES as we Still have to wear trainers in the gym!!!"..... "and he is only three!!!!" .....

I posted that my husband was the best husband when he'd brought me home a Nutella Krispy Kreme. I totally stand by it

I am forced to admit #yourhusbandisbetterthanmine

Where are the ‘I just enjoy FB and positivity makes me so happy for my wonderful friends who have succeeded’ replies. MN has changed 😂

An article I read on The Pool yesterday felt like a bit of a stealth boast, along the lines of - Thank goodness I've found something im only average at, as I've been so good at all but one of the hobbies I've tried and now make money from doing them.
It made me think of this thread instantly.

I can only think of one in 10 years of facebooking. I posted a video of my baby age about 15 months singing the ABC song - you could just about make out the tune but not the actual letters. An old friend from college with a baby a couple of months younger posted “amazing isn’t it? I remember when I first realised my baby was singing her ABCs, I couldn’t believe it!”

Oh fuck off and let me have my moment!

Not sure if one of my FB friends stealth boasts but she does post advice videos about how you can be a mummy and still love the business dream and lots of top tips on how to do it!

Live *