The Locksley-Oakenshield Academy of Hairdressing and Beauty Therapy

[ComeIntoTheSinisterGardenMaud]

All specialisms catered for. We offer courses in

Hairdressing, whether for long hair or a more conventional short back and sides

Manicures

Skincare: facepacks and other beauty treatments

Body art

Advice on styling and personal grooming, ranging from
formal evening attire to casual wear, with specialist sessions on military uniform.

Oh my oh my oh my indeed Maud!

It was stupid of me to go and look. I concluded a while back that the Confessions site had been taken over by Kevin and Perry, two 14 year old boys from Runcorn, who needed something new to do after they'd stopped 'being' Lucas on twitter. But, in retrospect, they were funnier on twitter.

Let's cleanse our minds with something entirely wholesome.

Wibblesomeness and wholesomeness in one winsome package, Maud.

::squirms uncomfortably::

I do wish they wouldn't publish the really horrible confessions. It seems a bit, erm, disrespectful almost. This is a real man they're writing about, after all.

How about something a little less wholesome but just as wibblesome?

Well said LadyD - I dread to think what he thinks of it, but then I suppose if you're in the public eye you learn not to take any notice of anything written about you!

And on that note, I'm off to bed - my eyes are shattered after staring at a computer screen all day doing my website.

Sleep well all.

That's exactly what I find so creepy, LadyD. If some anonymous person sent them a message saying they'd like to watch them ::drops large Rorschach ink blot on screen:: they'd probably report it to the police. What with that and people feeling entitled to pounce on him in the street to demand a photo or autograph, it's hardly surprising that he doesn't court publicity.

Isn't there a better equestrian photo, Massive? That one seems a bit distant and out of focus. Heavens knows show it looks on ultra-mega-zoom and I imagine you do too.

Ah yes, there's something very rakish there, LadyD.

I think Spiro has a confession of her own to make.

Heavens knows how it looks on ultra-mega-zoom

Dang! Busted!

It is a bit out of focus I suppose but I thought it was just my eyes, you see.

Night night, Vampy, meanwhile.

Good night, Vampy!

Or are your eyes too glazed over with lust?

Night night Vampy!

That is definitely nothing to do with me, Lady D. Hello Kitty makes me want to puke. I'm eternally grateful that apart from a couple of DVD's that came as part of a mixed box of retro cartoons, that monstrosity has passed Miss S by altogether.

Dust, did you say, LadyD?

Sure can feel that old horse envy stealing up on me

It is dusty in here, isn't it?

And just look at the state of the Aubusson

::sends cleaners their P45s::

Oh, that's just the bald patches from Maud's Plato sessions.

::reinstates cleaners::

Kitty Lucas!! I nearly spat my tea out!!

Oh, that's just the bald patches from Maud's Plato sessions.

ROFL! (grin)

Let's replace the Hello Kitty image with a more visually pleasing picture.

And for those who prefer their gifts wrapped...

Amazon charges extra for gift wrapping though, LadyD.

I'd rather have a game of pass the parcel!

And on that note, bitey knight!

What a good idea, Spiro. Now i won't be getting any sleep, either

A bargainous saving of £3.99, Massive.

Oh crumbs, LadyD. I think i'd pay extra for that.

Alas, I have no time these days for discussing Plato, as Mr Thornton and I have to devote our evening tête-à- tête to the application of warming poultices. Speaking of which, I must away.

Bonne nuit!

Time I was orf to count some sheep, too.

Sweet dReAms, all.