I am swinger AMA

[AMA097155]

As the title says really. I think there's a lot of misconceptions about my/our choices so I'd thought I'd post.

I am what some term a 'hotwife', although that word gives me the ick.

(A hotwife in the swinging and consensual non-monogamy community is a married or committed woman who has sex with other men with the full knowledge, consent, and active encouragement of her husband)

I have sex with people other than my husband, a a friend with benefits whom I'd seen for a over a year, and friends all within the swinging world.

My husband joins socially and for things like a party but isn't so keen on meeting women solo. We've also jointly attended a club, but the dynamic wasn't for us.

If you have any questions, ask away.

@EmpressStorm Yes, you’re right. Let’s hope so anyway. It’s all a bit grim.

Linda, 63, big woman who is happy to blow 10 men at a ‘party’ and thank them all while her ‘husband’ sits there playing with his flacid cock and half heartedly fingers Jo, 52, who goes by the name ‘Dirty Cum Slut’

That description 😂👏 That is exactly the calibre of people I imagine when I hear the word swinging. I can’t imagine any beautiful, soft, refined or sensual women doing this. Because I imagine anyone like that would know they’re too good for it. I’ve encountered a couple of swingers before and they were rough.

Is it awkward afterwards?

I mean she was onky 25 when she started this and she’s been clear it was within a year of meeting her husband, not many swingers of this age or younger,

She's not said she has kids as far as I'm aware

Jesus fucking Christ! The hate is off the charts! If all parties are upfront, no one is cheating, and everyone gets tested, what does it matter what other people do? THEY clearly enjoy it! And what's wrong with being called Linda or Jo or being 63 or 52 or big??

If you are attracted to the people you swing with, I imagine it could be TREMENDOUS fun. I find it very hard to be attracted to someone enough to sleep with them, but if you don't have that problem, it must be great! At least these people don't have the issue in their marriage that many do, which is feeling incredibly bored or frustrated sexually. Maybe such rageful reactions are all about jealousy?

To be fair this is how I see swingers too but the op was 25 when she started rhis and has been doing it 9 of the 10 years she’s known him

i wonder if he’s got a cuckold fetish, you see stories where men coerce women into shagging other men whilst they watch or shag them and then tell them about it,

her age is deeply concerning.

That doesn’t really make sense, why on earth would people be jealous. It’s hardly an exclusive club. Anyone can do it,

OP seems to have gone away, but I did want to ask about the homophobia among swingers.

Swingers have a reputation for being pretty biphobic. They are happy for women to have sex with other women, but men having sex with other men is a no go, which suggests some deeply problematic attitudes.

Is this an accurate depiction? That they are basically homophobic polys?

Oh yawn, the jealous line when anyone objects to unsavoury or distasteful lifestyles.

I’m not jealous I’m too good for swinging.

But that's my point, not everyone can do it. You have to be attracted to a wide range of people (I am not), you have to be appealing enough to a wide range of people (I am not) and you have to have a partner who enthusiastically consents. Sounds like a lot of stars have to line up.

I don't know, but I suspect that swingers have a small number of couples who they know and trust and have a good time with, and stick with them rather than going out and gaily getting naked with strangers.

Wait though, maybe that would be a polycule...🤔

Again that’s illogical, if you’re jealous it means you want to do it and wish it was you?

Some beautiful, refined women are called Linda. Like Linda Evangelista, Linda Evans, Linda Carter (in their day). I'm sure there are many called Jo, too!

I’m pretty sure Linda Evangelista and Linda Evans wouldn’t be caught dead getting spit roasted by Collin and Ian from Skegness

For masturbation, absolutely it’s unsatisfying without an orgasm.

For sex, no, not bothered. It’s a very different experience. Plus It would be dragging on too long for me, personally, if I was aiming for it every time.

You obviously know nothing about it. If you think it’s based on attraction you are naive. Attraction very quickly counts for very little. It can become an addiction leaving the participants very fragile emotionally and mentally. But hey it’s TREMENDOUS fun.

You can deny it all you like and explain it away but there is 100%, been some damage done to you for you to be ok with this. I imagine you’ll look back in time and be embarrassed at the very least. It’s not normal, it’s not empowering. It’s just grim and sad.

I wouldn’t. I’m not into swinging.

My kids are aware about my sex life (ie lack of ha ha) and Im aware whether or not they have bf or gf atm. Not a big deal.

So presumably at some point when the ops kids are old enough a similar (but very different to mine!) conversation will be had. Why not?

Wait can you explain more on this, what does this mean? Im interested to know

I think the hubby is less into it than she is. That comes across very strongly. I don't see much hate tbh.

What faux innocence?
I discuss my life with my adult kids They discuss theirs with mine. As do most people with their family surely. It would be weird not too. Not the details obviously but with a broader brush certainly.

Would you rather have fingers for toes or toes for fingers?