I’m a romany gypsy married to a non traveller AMA

[overstimulatedhermit]

For clarification I was married to a traveller and had 3 children. So I did go down the traditional route but he was very abusive and a narcissist and I’m now dealing with the aftermath of trauma and years of abuse. But that’s another matter, I wanted to start a thread because I know people would be curious about a gypsy marrying outside her culture.

Yes They do, because locals call the police and have them moved. Maybe read the thread and you’d learn something.

If you know them why don’t you ask them?

I thought this thread was an AMA? Where we ask you questions.

How am I meant to know the answers of 1000s of travellers and gypsy’s that I don’t know? The ama is about me. Why would I know the answers for questions your asking me about people I don’t know?

I just presumed that you'd know other travellers and would have some insight into why homeschooling and online learning aren't utilized.

I know travellers obviously but I don’t know every single one and what their motives are for not homeschooling their children. A lot are and have tutors but that’s the only ones I know. I can’t speak for a whole community in the same way you can’t speak for yours.

Of course not. I was just questioning the assertion that moving around and not having internet makes education impossible.

It does though. How can you not see that people moving around everyday have the time for that when they are trying to survive. Remember they are not just moving for the fun of it, it’s their life and in the mean time trying to work and provide for their family. To some people education isn’t important because we don’t need an education to earn money. We know how to make money and we can turn our hands to anything. Thousands of T&G women work and have their own business and they come from very little education so they don’t value it because they know you don’t need it to make money. And at the end of the day that’s the end goal isn’t it..to make money. Whether you get that by being a doctor or owning a clothing business it’s the same result you just didn’t get grades.

How are travellers supposed to sign up for internet, gas, electric, water bills etc if they don't have a fixed abode?

They don’t.

How do people who are always moving around and therefore have no fixed address have stable internet access? People are determined to make this an issue of their own making instead of systemic failures to ensure sufficient access to services.

Do you have to use the pay as you go key card things you can get in a shop for gas and electric?

I don't know how the water would work.

Or internet.

Thank you.

That does make question your previous post saying that there wasn't anything to stop traveller/gypsy girls becoming doctors though. They do have far fewer options and opportunities with only a primary school education.

Mobile data. It's not exactly difficult these days.

But wouldn't you need a fixed abode to sign up for a mobile data plan? Or am I being stupid?

No, you don't. You can just get PAYG sim cards.

“We know how to make money and we can turn our hands to anything.”

@overstimulatedhermit well, not quite anything! Medicine, dentistry, teaching, are just some of the things that spring to mind that cannot be done without further education.

Thank you

I have heard multiple stories of domestic abuse in the traveller community, that's why I asked the question.

Oh I thought you meant with the ones who move around. Those on sites have metres to pay gas and electricity. Also pay council tax and water.

Hmm, not sure about the men not talking rudely in front of the women. That’s certainly not the case with a few Romany families I know. Do you actually know many other gypsies OP or just mainly your own family?

And of course it’s misogynistic to have women doing all the domestic tasks. Sounds like you haven’t embraced your husbands culture at all, more forced him into yours with all the things he “had to” get used to. Not that I’d marry a man who I knew spoke badly of women when I was out of earshot and struggled to suppress that when he first entered my family!

I also have never heard of travellers moving the distances in one week that the OP describes. That would be a very extreme example.

Well these things wouldn’t be a problem if t&g were not classed as 3rd class citizens in their own country. The councils and government do not help them, they are not building them permanent places to live. They want children to have an education but have forgotten about travellers.

You don't need a fixed abode nor do you need to sign up to a plan.

You’re being stupid. Every traveller round here is glued to their phone, just like everyone else. How do you think they upload their TikTok’s 🤣

Like I said making money is the key. You don’t need a degree to make money.