I’m a romany gypsy married to a non traveller AMA

[overstimulatedhermit]

For clarification I was married to a traveller and had 3 children. So I did go down the traditional route but he was very abusive and a narcissist and I’m now dealing with the aftermath of trauma and years of abuse. But that’s another matter, I wanted to start a thread because I know people would be curious about a gypsy marrying outside her culture.

Isn’t domestic abuse in every community?

Okay, so say that then, instead of pretending it's not a disadvantage for children to not get an education.

I’m not even going to reply to this comment. Ignorant is what you are.

I did. But you clearly didn’t read the whole thread. Just saw an AMA about travellers and jumped on.

Again though, if people aren't settled, which councils should be providing this housing? How would it be funded and how would it be allocated?
It's hard enough for councils to house people who are actually resident so I'm not sure how it would work with transient communities.

You build them and people would come and settle. It’s not rocket science.

I've read every single post.

Do you know much about your ancestors? Is your cultural history taught to the little ones, etc? Either day to day or when they start asking questions.

Who builds them? Where? And who will come? Paid for by what money?
It's really not that simple.

I do, my grandparents told me alot before they died which I always found fascinating. Kids aren’t taught it but we do tell them about their ancestors and where they came from.

In the same way anything else is built by the council, you build it we rent it easy.

If you were to live in a permanent traveller site, which parts of your 'traveller' cultures would change?

Would you still travel alot?

Do you think your life would change massively if you lived on a permanent traveller site?

That's not how it works though. Plus you already described a site that people don't want to use. It's really not that simple. For any housing.

I live in a house. But if I didn’t why would my culture change if I lived on a site?

Because part of the traveller culture is to travel alot... Or no?

No they don’t want to use it but do they have a choice no! Would you want to smell slaughtered animals all day? Or let your kids out to play next to a train track? But it’s ok for us to live there considering we’re at the bottom of the barrel. Take your ignorant self out of here.

No that’s not what makes you a gypsy/traveller. Why not educate yourself before spouting rubbish. Further down someone linked some books and website go have some fun.

I think you're a little delusional about where any new council housing (of which there is staggeringly little) is located these days. It's all out of town with no infrastructure. I don't know about next to a slaughterhouse, but it's next to the sewage treatment plant where i live. Councils just can't afford to allocate prime land to caravan rents for people who don't even live in the boroughs yet unfortunately (or anything else really). I'm not sure how you think this would be achievable.

Would all travellers and gypsies want to settle down in one place if offered houses OP? Or would the draw of a nomadic lifestyle remain important for some, if indeed it is important? Would it depend on the life stage too, eg having young children needing schooling would make it more likely to settle down?

Regarding housing, if people have money from their businesses do they ever rent or buy privately, or is their income level always too low for that to be feasible? Or is there a cultural expectation for the government to provide. (I don’t mean that in a negative way, sorry, just curious about the differences.)

Thanks for this OP, very interesting discussion.

If the results when you google are to be believed, then the rates in traveller communities are dramatically higher.

The reality is that while domestic violence can happen to anyone of any background, we know it impacts different groups in different ways. If nothing else, due to finances or cultural mores, some people have an easier time leaving when domestic violence first appears.

You’re the delusional one. Don’t live in the borough? They don’t live there because they are moved on and on. They would live in the borough if there was somewhere to settle. My god the ignorance on this thread is laughable.

If the travellers all wanted to settle then why haven’t they contacted the council to be put on the waiting list for a council house like everyone else?

Is that not the point of this thread? Ask me anything? So you can educate people?

What is the point in this if your going to get defensive and passive aggressive. It really defeats the object.

I'm asking you because I'm curious. Again, is that not the point?

Look, you admitted that you can’t talk for most travellers as you have no idea about them but you’re just being rude now to people who have a fair point.

I am going in to my exercise class now (and I’ll be there with a few women from the traveller community). They aren’t moved on, they live on one of the many sites available here for gypsies.

We did have a conversation recently about a group of travellers who pitched up on a school field. Some of their husbands went down to tell them there was room on several of the sites here and were unceremoniously told to get fucked. As usually happens, yet still they offer.

That is not a group of people desperate to be welcomed and to settle. I’d say you’re also a bit ignorant to the problems faced by communities (both traveller and otherwise) and local councils.

Ill show them this thread when we have a coffee afterwards

A lot don’t want to live in houses. A lot buy houses, a lot buy land to build a home. Believe it or not people want to send their children to school, the worlds changing and they are moving on with the times, but the culture will never change. For instance some will travel in the summer and come home for the winter months. Non travellers have this notion that you can’t be a gypsy/traveller if you are settled and that isn’t the case, it’s in our blood, culture, traditions. You cant tie a dog up thats lived its whole life being free to run, because it will become withdrawn, depressed and die. And that’s the same for us. It’s in us it’s part of our personality, morals etc we are free people. The government and councils have failed us and they need to do more.