I'm a virgin and celibate by choice - ask me anything

[Vampirette]

As the title says, I'm a (very much adult) virgin who has chosen celibacy as a way of life for various reasons. If that's something anyone might be curious about, feel free to ask questions.

Some info about me that might be relevant to keep in mind (because I know there are a lot of negative stigma and stereotypes about adult virgins):

• I'm heterosexual (woman attracted to only men)
• Yes, I'm religious - but no, my religion is not the reason why I have chosen celibacy (as it actually very much discourages it!)
• I live in a European country I'm not native to. I originate from a Slavic country
• I'm not asexual, or lack sexual drive in any way. On the contrary, I have an extremely high sex drive
• I don't suffer from any mental or physical illnesses or disabilities that prevent me from physical intimacy. I'm in fact a very tactile person who loves to be close to people
• I'm not neurodivergent, shy, autistic, or anything else similar
• I don't have low self-esteem. Quite the opposite...
• I lead a very normal life. I have a family, friends, I went to Uni, have a great job, get on great with everyone I come across, I have lots of hobbies, and I spend a lot of my time travelling
• I don't have any issue with attracting men. Men do show a lot of interest in me, so my celibacy also does not come down to not having options

The obvious question is why?

Are you planning to change this with relationship/marriage?

Do you enjoy your own company/living alone? Many women are remaining child free now without stigma and I think that’s fantastic, have you always known you would want to be child free?

As a way of life - so I'm assuming that even if you marry/ have a partner you won't have sex?

Have you ever been in love?

Do you think that not having sex makes you better or more superior to those that do?

Do nice girls enjoy sex?

Do you masturbate or have sexual fantasies?

There are more than one reason why. But the main ones being

1. I have a really good life, so don't feel the need for a partner unless he ADDS positively to my already good life. Which all men I have come across don't

2. I find the quality of men to be extremely bad and low. I can't help but, but I find low quality men extremely unattractive and...they basically give me the massive ick. Like any normal woman, there's no way I can be intimate with anyone who gives me the ick

3. I'm a quite demanding person, because I am, myself, very giving. But I value myself, and think I deserve that people I make an effort with make as much of an effort with me. If they don't (all men I have come across don't), I'm not interested

And yes, if I, by any chance, find someone suitable I will not remain celibate - after marriage. I don't believe in pre-marital sex.

Yes, I do enjoy my own company a lot. However, I don't live alone. I tried that once, and it wasn't really for me. I live with my amazing parents.

I have never had strong feelings about having children. I have never been desperate for them, but I have also never been totally against the idea of having kids. I'm very much "go with the flow" as far as kids are concerned.

Do intend to have a sexual relationship in the future?

Sounds like a peaceful and wonderful life to me.

If I find someone suitable I will not remain celibate AFTER marriage. I don't believe in pre-marital sex, so will not be having sex until I'm married.

No, I have never been in love.

Do I think not having sex makes me better / superior to those who do? Yes and no.
No, because I do believe we are all more than our sexlife.
Yes, because I think people's sexual choices and behaviour says a lot about their character, and a lot about how much they care about themselves. But in the end of the day, I actually don't care what people do! And they shouldn't care what I think of them.

Absolutely!

If I find a suitable partner, of course. But only after marriage, as I don't believe in pre-marital sex.

Thank you but you missed my last question:

Do nice girls enjoy sex?

Thank you, it REALLY is!

You sound young, although say you’re an adult, and live with your parents, so Muslim? Jewish? Are you in your early twenties? Early thirties? There’s a big difference there. Aren’t most Slavic countries within the continent of Europe??

You sound happy so why do you want people to question it?

So you aren't choosing to remain celibate or a virgin then - the title is misleading. You want to have a healthy sexual and romantic relationship, but you are just waiting for the right man.

That's a very different thing.

Sorry about that.

I hate that term, "nice girls". I prefer to be referred to as a virgin. So, do virgins enjoy sex? I can't speak for all virgins, but I definitely do. As mentioned, I have a very high sex drive, and I'm actually very open-minded sexually. Provided the sex happens within the comfounds of marriage, as I'm not into in pre-marital sex.

How old are you?

Are you worried it might be a let down if and when you finally get round to it?

I don’t have any questions op but you sound great. It’s refreshing to see such a strong minded woman on here who has such high standards. Well done.

How old are you ?

What do you consider to be sex? Is it just PIV sex that you avoid?

Thank you

When have I said I want people to question my happiness? Like anyone else in the AMA section, I shared a-not-so-common position I'm in and offered people to ask me questions about it IF they are curious, and because I enjoy talking about celibacy. If someone is not curious or interested in the same thing, that's absolutely fine.

I'm 38 and a Muslim from Russia. In Russia we typically differentiate between ourselves and Europe, but yes, I guess we technically are European as well.

How old are you?

No, the title is very accurate, actually. I'm absolutely not waiting for anybody. I'm living my life and wholly expect to never meet someone suitable. I'm just saying that I'm not going to reject someone suitable IF I so happen to come across a suitable person. But I'm not looking nor waiting.