In a 'huge' age gap relationship- AMA

[renieve]

NC'd for this.

In a 'huge' age gap relationship for three years. Age gap is 28 years. Partner is male, I'm female. I appreciate this won't be interesting to many people, in which case please ignore AMA!

How did you meet?

What's the attraction? How old are you? What do you see happening invthe future?

Who is the older partner?

Who is older? Does the older one of you worry about being alone when they are elderly? Have you taken account of it for pension/retirement planning? Does the younger worry about missing out on anything - eg the older might be unable to travel while the younger still wants to.

(ten year age gap here and these are some of the things that play on my mind)

@Liveoppositeastream online

what did those around you think/react?
fwiw I also have a much older dh, not quite the difference, so always love to hear others experiences x

I had a friend who was 18 years younger than partner. She'll be a young 42 when he's 60 etc
She'll just be 52 when he is well retired. She'll be widow with two kids in time

Do you have, or are you planning to have children?

@Highlyflavouredgravy I guess the honest answer to that is I've always been attracted to older men. My first TV crush when I was 14 was a man 38 years older than me. I'm mid 20's.

Not reading these in order but will try to reply to as many as possible. @LadyGardenersQuestionTime we have two each but not together. Neither want any more.

Are his children older than you?

What's your relationship like with your dad?

@mexicanandafewdrinks well.... my children adore him but haven't yet realised the huge age gap. They are young though, so they will in time. His family have been very gracious and kind to me. Not sure what total strangers think.

@updin don't have one. I knew who he was but he was never present (his choice) when I was growing up. Saw him less than 10 times to my memory. I did get to speak to him before he passed away after 15 years of no contact (again his choice). Why do you ask?

Is this a he’s rich and you’re skint scenario or is he a regular salaried guy

@Zone2NorthLondon he is reasonably paid but not rich. Earns more than me but again, neither earn 'heaps'.

@tadpolecity I keep having my head in the sand about this.

Do you wonder how your sex life might be in the future, when you're mid 40s and he's 70s? My relationship age gap is only 8 years (M 64, F56) and tbh am really struggling with his lack of interest

Ahh, this explains it all then.

@AlexandraMarch explain?

how rude and judgemental.

Why do you ask?

I often wonder if those who have relationships with people old enough to be their parents are doing so influenced by poor relationships with a parent. I've seen it a fair bit.

jealousy I imagine, tend to get that a lot with mums net and age gaps

Rude.

Good to see the tired old cliches being trotted out. Daddy figures or sugar daddies.

There is 20 years between me and DH and i have heard them all. Along with the gold digger assumptions.

I would just ask posters to be respectful. Love does not come packaged neatly and according to what randomers think is ideal or what people make lazy assumptions about. it comes in many shapes and guises.