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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

MIL drinking 'concern'

187 replies

Becc91 · 03/08/2026 21:36

So, bit of a long one..
Currently on holiday in Devon with DH, DS ,DD and, ILs. After what I thought was a lovely family meal (paid for by me, ofc 🙄) my charming MIL pulled me aside to express her "concerns".
Apparently my couple of gin and tonics is getting "out of hand" and is 'setting a bad example' for my daughter. To make matters worse my DS then chimed in and called me embarassing!! 😲
Feel totally humiliated and demoralised when i've put a lot of effort into organising -and paying for- this holiday. Can't look MIL in the eye and DH doesn't understand why I'm upset.
AIBU to enjoy my holiday the way I want???

OP posts:
ThreadGuardDog · 04/08/2026 17:49

RockinCara · 04/08/2026 11:15

If two members of your family that are with you on the holiday have commented, there is probably some truth in what they’re saying. And it doesn’t sound like your mil tried to embarrass you, she discretely pulled you aside. So I’d reflect on it personally before starting a fall out.

Given that DH was also the worse for starting to drink earlier than OP, why wasn’t he ‘pulled aside’ ?

outerspacepotato · 04/08/2026 18:06

ThreadGuardDog · 04/08/2026 17:49

Given that DH was also the worse for starting to drink earlier than OP, why wasn’t he ‘pulled aside’ ?

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He was passed out upstairs.

ThreadGuardDog · 04/08/2026 18:14

outerspacepotato · 04/08/2026 18:06

He was passed out upstairs.

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🤣🤣🤣

Magicpaintbrush · 04/08/2026 18:14

I would be SO pissed off if anyone tried to police my drinking on holiday! Normal 'rules' don't apply on holiday. Unless you are being obnoxious or puking on the floor - which it doesn't sound like you are - then I would tell your MIL and DS to mid their own bloody business. You are a grown woman, not a child, drink what you want.

Thingcanonlygetbetter · 04/08/2026 18:17

Becc91 · 03/08/2026 21:49

It would've been about 4, between late afternoon and early evening.

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On your holidays, 4 drinks. If it was everyday that’s a different story, but on your holidays. I would be fuming

Magicpaintbrush · 04/08/2026 18:17

I'm on holiday right now OP and working my way through a vodka and coke after the year from hell - sod it. Life is too short - it really truly is.

jeaux90 · 05/08/2026 10:53

Cherrytree86 · 04/08/2026 12:26

A mother should never drink alcohol in front of her children

Just a mother or father too? (YABU BTW)

Cherrytree86 · 05/08/2026 20:19

jeaux90 · 05/08/2026 10:53

Just a mother or father too? (YABU BTW)

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I’m joking of course, I would sincerely hope no one genuinely thinks such drivel!

dh280125 · 06/08/2026 02:46

Beachbeach · 03/08/2026 21:51

That is a fair few and its spirits. If your kids are teens probs not so much of an issue. If you have small kids I probably agree with your MIL

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A fair few? OMG. What has happened to make the world so puritanical. I'm in an office with a free bar. I expect to start drinking at 4pm and then more at a family dinner tonight. This thread has inspired me!

2chocolateoranges · 06/08/2026 08:51

Cherrytree86 · 04/08/2026 12:26

A mother should never drink alcohol in front of her children

I go out drinking with mine! They are both over 18, dh and I had a couple of drinks around our children when they were younger, we didn’t want them to see it as a bad thing, but a normal part of life that some people partake in.

my father was an alcoholic so alcohol was deeply frowned upon in my family. Sibling is one too, thankfully I can take it or leave it but do enjoy a few on holiday.

Muffsies · 06/08/2026 10:21

2chocolateoranges · 06/08/2026 08:51

I go out drinking with mine! They are both over 18, dh and I had a couple of drinks around our children when they were younger, we didn’t want them to see it as a bad thing, but a normal part of life that some people partake in.

my father was an alcoholic so alcohol was deeply frowned upon in my family. Sibling is one too, thankfully I can take it or leave it but do enjoy a few on holiday.

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My 23yo son will bring me a beer and we'll watch youtube together. Sometimes i'm even 'allowed' to go to his snooker club and drink and play pool with him & his friends.

I'd rather teach my son how to have a few drinks and enjoy himself in family company, than leave it to some bellends down the pub to potentially get him into bad habits.

MyballsareSandy2015 · Today 08:36

Love a bottomless brunch with my DDs 🥂

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