So sick of being so angry all the time because I'm so fucking tired

(184 Posts)

MNHQ have commented on this thread.

AmericasTorturedBrow Wed 08-Jan-14 14:18:42

2yo DD is a shit sleeper. I never know what the night will bring but guarantee at some point to at least be mutterin under my breath all kinds Of obscenities and every single fucking morning I spend the first 2hours trying to get my sleep deprivation induced rage under control.

I am turning into a horrible mother seriously regretting having Children at all because I'm so fucking tired. She's bloody awesome during the day, cute and funny and clever and hilarious and wonderful to have around, she doesn't even tantrum that much even though she's got a strong will - but I m actively starting to hate her at nightsad

DSsleot through from 8months and at 5 is still a good sleeper - why the fuck won't DD be the same?!

TheFabulousIdiot Wed 08-Jan-14 14:20:31

I know how you feel. Three year old here and DH is the one taking the brunt of my anger.

emblosion Wed 08-Jan-14 14:28:48

Solidarity fist bump from me. DS1 is 18 months and sleep is awful lately. Hes taken to waking up screaming inconsolably during the night and is impossible to settle unless one of us sleeps with him.

DS2 is 6 months and is a slightly better sleeper but has now started refusing his cot. Ffs. I'm SO FUCKING tired. I go back to work in Feb and honestly dont know how I'll manage.

emblosion Wed 08-Jan-14 14:29:28

Am also a seething ball of rage.

AmericasTorturedBrow Wed 08-Jan-14 14:43:39

Thanks so much everyone, was really hoping for a tirade of similarly feeling folk and not some uselessly "helpful" mother of a 4month old suggesting fucking PUPD/gradual retreat/no cry sleep solution etc fucking etc

RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE!!

God that feels better already!

LiberalLibertine Wed 08-Jan-14 14:48:25

Yep, same here.

Dd is 2.8 and every night without fail she will get up, and getting her back down takes over an hour, if she goes back down?!

I'm dead on my feet most of the time.

glorious Wed 08-Jan-14 14:54:23

oh I'm with you. I never used to be an angry person sad

My rage comes and goes quite unpredictably. I'm going to be great at work (also due back February) shock

AmericasTorturedBrow Wed 08-Jan-14 14:55:32

I used to be so chilled out hmm

Zamboni Wed 08-Jan-14 15:00:42

I'm with you. Almost 3 yo DD sleeps like a dream but in clear karmic retribution for being a smug-mother-of-sleeping-PFB, DS (14 mo) is a fucking nightmare. Makes several times a night, won't stay in cot all night, starts the day at 4am. I work FT and it's exhausting.

RAGE angryangryangry on a daily basis. Competitive tiredness too - I know no one gives a shit but I cannot hear anyone expressing tiredness in my presence and it takes a supreme effort of will not to punch people in the face snap at anyone who claims to be tired.

IcouldstillbeJoseph Wed 08-Jan-14 15:00:48

I'm a EXACTLY the same. I am a foul mum to DS (3) and like an unexplored bomb wandering around in public... Just waiting for the fuse to be lit....

AmericasTorturedBrow Wed 08-Jan-14 15:06:42

God yes the competitive tiredness - ESPECIALLY from people without children. You know what? Just go back to fucking bed if you're so tired, lie in at the weekend BECAUSE YOU CAN!

I hate childless people

Meglet Wed 08-Jan-14 16:08:11

Me too. Ratty, vacant and short tempered.

MummyKatkins1 Wed 08-Jan-14 17:02:05

So pleased to know I'm not alone! Have a 3wk old and spend my day alternating between crying and and wanting to bite someones head off. Other half woke up this morning with a migraine and said he hadn't slept well and rather than being sympathetic as I would previously have been, I just felt angry. I haven't slept well for too long to remember! Definitely have competitive tiredness. Also feel guilty for being such a horrible person most of the time now :-(

TheFabulousIdiot Wed 08-Jan-14 17:21:09

Does anyone here ever get a lie in? I co-sleep (rod for my own back blah blah blah) and still breastfeed(sticks even bigger rod up jumper) so if DS wakes then so do I, that is if I am even asleep in the first place. DH is in the spare room for horrendous snoring and DS often won't go to him anyway so I hardly ever get to lie in. I so envy those couples who take turns at the weekend.

DH also moans constantly about how badly he sleeps (!!!) and sometimes jokingly says 'my lie in tomorrow, yeah?' which makes me feel all punchy!

AngelinaCongleton Wed 08-Jan-14 17:26:52

God I know. After 4 years starting to come out the other side. Good news is my anger has DRAMATICALLY reduced. 2 things, friend advised early nights which I resisted because i didnt want to go to bed half an hour after my children but actually they do make a difference. And the snoring nose strips and throat spray work. Sometimes it seems every member of my family I determined to wake me up and my problem is I can't get back to sleep easily if at all. Sympathies!

IcouldstillbeJoseph Wed 08-Jan-14 17:42:36

Tell what really pisses me off - my friends who have amazing sleepers telling me 'they know how I feel' after they've had one night of getting up once for probably about 3 minutes.
Fuck off.
Come and see me when you've not had more than 3 hours unbroken sleep for a year and we will talk
I am a horrible person

Meglet Wed 08-Jan-14 18:48:24

icouldstilbejoseph another unexploded bomb here.

Anyway, 5yo DD is the real 'problem', the last 3 years have been wretched. She won't settle in the evening, is often up at night (sometimes has a tantrum sad) then 7yo DS tends to wake me at 6:30 (he is good in the night, a textbook gina ford baby). I'm another one who just gets 2/3hr blocks of a broken 6hr sleep. I thought school would tire her out but I was very wrong.

And no lie ins ever as I'm a LP, and I work p/t. My nerves and patience are fucked.

IcouldstillbeJoseph Wed 08-Jan-14 18:52:47

I hate every lying twat person that told me "oh second babies are so much easier, they have no choice, they just slot in, blah fucking blah"
What a heap of horse shit

IcouldstillbeJoseph Wed 08-Jan-14 18:54:16

And I hate those who have been in the same boat as me with the shit sleep and then 'graduate' out of it but I still have to endure it.
I resent them wholeheartedly. And then hate myself a bit more.

IcouldstillbeJoseph Wed 08-Jan-14 18:54:38

I hate quite a lot it would seem....

Meglet Wed 08-Jan-14 19:01:32

I can't do the going to bed just after the dc's thing because that's when I have to make my dinner and sort the house out. My bodyclock is such a mess.

Pollydon Wed 08-Jan-14 19:04:07

My shit sleeper turns 20 this year. My low point was refusing to leave the health visitor clinic when he was 26 months because Id not had more than 4 hrs unbroken sleep for about, erm 26 months. I was a raving loon & that was with my dm taking him overnight once a month so me & dh could sleep.
It does get better , at some point. flowers for you all going through it.

jimijack Wed 08-Jan-14 19:08:59

Ds 1 first slept through the night aged 5, he was at school.

It was 5 years of him waking up to 16 times per night.

He is 10 now.
We have an 11 month old. You don't get 2 bad sleepers do you?

Fuck the actual fuck off. Yes I fucking have.

I told the hv that it must be me, what am I doing wrong???

I'm too tired to be angry.

Bone drenching exhaustion.

ohmeohmyforgotlogin Wed 08-Jan-14 19:13:41

Feel your pain. Ds has SN now 12 and still up half the night though better than every 45 mins like when he was small. His sister also pretty crap sleeper and frequently in my bed. Dh shores and randomly elbows me in the head. I would, and may, kill to have a room of my own, or even a house of my own, in another county just so I can get a nights sleep. Even that won't work though as body clock fucked up totally now.

StealthPolarBear Wed 08-Jan-14 19:15:22

I'm sorry op sad dd was a dreadful sleeper but just after the age of two she started sleeping through, it was like a switch flicked. Hoping the same happens for you.
Two years later and the novelty of a full nights sleep has not worn off. Plus when I have broken night like the last two have been it is lovely to think - I can go to bed early and chances are ill have a lovely long sleep. People don't get that. If you're sleep deprived at any other point in your life you just catch up when you can. When it's child related, yes you may have had a bad night the night before and chances are you'll have another that night. That was what for me made it so hard. Sympathies.

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