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Original poster

So sick of being so angry all the time because I'm so fucking tired

194 replies

AmericasTorturedBrow · 08/01/2014 14:18

2yo DD is a shit sleeper. I never know what the night will bring but guarantee at some point to at least be mutterin under my breath all kinds Of obscenities and every single fucking morning I spend the first 2hours trying to get my sleep deprivation induced rage under control.

I am turning into a horrible mother seriously regretting having Children at all because I'm so fucking tired. She's bloody awesome during the day, cute and funny and clever and hilarious and wonderful to have around, she doesn't even tantrum that much even though she's got a strong will - but I m actively starting to hate her at nightSad

DSsleot through from 8months and at 5 is still a good sleeper - why the fuck won't DD be the same?!

OP posts:
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charming123 · 26/03/2015 21:39

So true. At least your boyfriend only moved into the spare room (ohthegoats). Mine moved out when baby was 6 week old! He has had him stay at his overnight twice since and now refuses too as baby interferes with his sleep. Just when I thought there was no more anger that I could feel, his dad fucks me right over. I often fantasise about smashing his eyes in (dad I mean), especially between the hours of 2am to 5am. Well its getting a little easier now the days are longer, I think x

Queendedede · 25/10/2015 09:02

Ha ha, this is brilliant! Resurrecting this thread for all those zombie Mums who need to know they aren't alone!

goldglittershitter · 25/10/2015 09:12

Ah sorry, OP. It's awful. I totally understand tho don't actually have enough energy to feel rage or anything really . DT (3) does not sleep n the added bonus is that he also wakes his brother (who is a wonderful sleeper when not disturbed) every night with his histrionics so in the early hours of each night I have two 3 y/o boys downstairs with me jumping all over the sofas .... I could cry if I had any life in me.

Brew n Cake for us all.

goldglittershitter · 25/10/2015 09:13

Oops, didn't realise was a zombie .... Blush

Great thread tho n hopefully by now OP is getting oodles of sleep!

Queendedede · 25/10/2015 09:21

Don't worry gold, I'm pretty much in the same boat as the OP so your comment means a lot Flowers

Purpleboa · 25/10/2015 09:25

Good to see this! When I posted a similarly angry thread I got flamed for daring to be angry, so it's reassuring to see that it's Ok to be :) I am feeling angry at the world today so it's nice to know I am not alone!

Queendedede · 25/10/2015 09:29

It's fine to be angry, people don't realise how crap long term sleep deprivation can make you feel - it affects all aspects of life negatively and pretty much makes you feel trapped as no easy/obvious way out. Why wouldn't you be angry about that? Flowers

JeffreySadsacIsUnwell · 25/10/2015 09:34

This has NOT made me feel any better. I posted on the original thread, under a different user name. At that point, I'd had only 4.5 years of broken sleep. More than 18 months later and nothing has improved. Just going to sob in a corner now!

Queendedede · 25/10/2015 09:43

Oh dear, and I was hoping for a success story! I suppose we can sleep when we are dead or when they go off go uni..... Which ever comes first....... Wink

ISpidersmanYouMeanPirate · 25/10/2015 09:53

Have you tried a sleep consultant?

DS1 didn't sleep through until he was 3.

Aged 17 months DS2 is still waking 8 times a night...

We've just started with a sleep consultant and saw results in two nights almost without tears! (Not even from me)

I Never considered it but have zero quality of life atm and need something to change

Queendedede · 25/10/2015 10:03

Who are you using may I ask? It's a strange one here as DS2 is 18mo and had been getting better until a couple of weeks ago. He wakes about 5 times a night ATM. He self settles alone in his cot at bedtime and quite often settles quickly at night once I go in, lay him down and tuck him in again. Not sure why he can't stay asleep for long, maybe separation anxiety or food intolerance issue but have no other symptoms of that really. Sigh, I think it's just his habit/need to check I'm still there multiple times a night.

ISpidersmanYouMeanPirate · 25/10/2015 11:01

Ann Caird at nurturing sleep co UK

Her approach looks at the emotional needs of the child. DS2 was waking 8 times a night. The Second night he only woke twice!

Can't wait to see how this continues Smile

JoandMax · 25/10/2015 12:05

I used to feel furious when DS2 was little and sleep was shocking. DS1 slept through at 2 and there's only 1.5 years between them so it was double wake ups for a while, horrific....

DS2 is now 5.7 and still doesn't sleep through regularly - we got to about 3 and just gave up trying to work it out and accepted that he was a crap sleeper. It was actually easier and the anger went! I don't care if he sleeps in our bed, if he refuses sleep at bedtime I just let him get up. Not ideal but much less stress........

TheCunkOfPhilomena · 25/10/2015 18:14

Oh I have found a home here!

DS is 4 (5 in January) and is so sleep resistant I am actually astounded he can function on a daily basis.

I am a LP so have all the night wakings and the last two weeks have found me close to breaking point (school seems to have made things worse, not better). The only silver lining is the nights he stays with his dad, I cannot wait for next weekend.

I hate myself for being so irritable and emotional all the time. I hate it when other people complain about being tired after having a night out or long day at work. I hate it when people offer advice that I have tried a million times. I love my friends that just agree that it bloody sucks and put up with my moaning.

cabbageleaf · 25/10/2015 18:32

What I find interesting reading this thread is the number of people who went on to have another DC - or even more than one - having already had two crap sleepers, and the number of mums whose partner sleeps in another room and doesn't help at all. Sounds really unfair to me and definitely like part of the problem - the rage is bound to be less of you have a supportive DH! And perhaps the kids would sleep better if their dads did bedtimes regularly.

Rinceoir · 25/10/2015 22:45

My 18month was an AMAZING sleeper from 6 weeks-6 months. Then she started waking hourly. Improved gradually to one wake a night until about 2 weeks ago when she reverted to newborn sleep- waking every 2-4hours, wanting breastfeeds constantly and wanting to sleep on top of me. I'm 7 days into a 12 day stretch at work (with 2 13hour days) and I'm wrecked. Yawn. I'm sure it's a phase.

zombiemeow · 01/11/2015 15:06

I have found my people Grin

My ds is only 11 months but can not get the nack of this sleeping business. I am currently fucking wrestling holding him to try and make him nap because he is so tired but he's having none of it. Last night he slept from around 2-4 with a wake up imbetween Hmm I woke up with him at 4, later in the day I get a message from a friend with a 12 week old, she tells me she has had an awful night, her poor little pumpkin woke up twice AngryAngryAngry fucking twice!!!!

From the moment I wake up I dread nap times/bed times.

I was on various sleep regression threads, but saw everyone come and go whilst I was stuck in an 11 month long sleep regression Hmm

caffeineanddryshampoo · 04/11/2015 21:51

I'm going to camp out here. 5 year old son was a high needs crap sleeper who sleeps well now but I have a 10 week old who refuses to sleep lying down sigh.I just want to sleep horizontally.

What sort of things does this Sleep support lady suggest?

VocationalGoat · 04/11/2015 21:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mumtoblaire · 19/11/2015 17:57

My dd2 now 5yr has been a non sleeper since born. Was told once shes moving about more and walking she'll sleep better - no she didn't. When she starts nursery, when she starts school - no no no takes two hours to fall asleep at night constantly shouts for me dad just wont do. dd1 sleep brilliant always has. I dream of sleeping fro 10 pm till 7 am.

CalpolOnToast · 22/11/2015 12:43

Ugh my DS has been dreadful with a few good spells, I am resigned to it being shit until he can put on a light and read. DH's sleep pattern is similar. And what is it about people who ask about how yours sleep then tell you how great theirs are?? I prefer my aunt who said my cousin didn't sleep through until she was 6!

NewBallsPlease00 · 30/11/2015 06:28

Cab I join in? Tonight I've had maybe an hours sleep
The post school pick up of ds1 which is usually filled with a fractious 4yo abs mummy moves to another level when it's me who's super tired
Also eyes don't work properly and feel dizzy

Roomba · 30/11/2015 12:26

Can I join in too? I am so exhausted today that I am basically 'sofa parenting' my bossy 3.4 year old DS and keep almost nodding off before he bellows something excitedly at me...

DS1 woke me a lot until 6m old, but then once he went into his own room it was like a switch flicked and that was it, he slept all night just like that. Never woke unless ill.

DS2 has always been a shit sleeper. He had awful reflux for about 2 years, and usually ended up in bed with me, feeding half the bloody night. I was on my knees with exhaustion. My DP moved out and left me to it. I had to give up driving as was lethally tired all the time.

Things did improve a bit this summer (so DS2 was just 3). I got them bunk beds and moved him out of my room - tried this before but always failed as it did not improve the sleep at all and just left me tireder having to get up constantly. We had a couple of months of his either sleeping all night, or just waking once and going back to sleep after some milk at about 11.30, so not too bad.

But the last few weeks.... DS wakes 4 or 5 times a night, demanding milk either in his bed or mine, yelling and sobbing, won't sleep unless actually attached to me (I have wanted to stop BF for about 2 years due to this)...

So last night I was very firm. Father Christmas is not bringing him a HUDL unless he can sleep all night with no milk and let Mummy have some sleep from now on! He woke at 10.30pm, I reminded him, and he sobbed himself to sleep in about 15 mins. Success, I thought. Then my new neighbours decided to have a huge row from 11.00pm - 12.50pm, involving screaming, yelling ;I do love you Babe!' 3 million times, she punched the wall and hurt her hand.... more yelling...argh! They finally stopped and DS woke again at 1.30am. Took almost an hour to go back to sleep but I stood firm. Then he woke again at 4.30 and took another hour. I couldn't get back to sleep then as the morning traffic started to get loud outside so that was it... about 3 hours sleep.

Tonight WILL be better! Or else! I'm considering sending him to stay with his dad for a wee to break this cycle, but can't really as his new wife is 38 weeks pregnant.

Mol92 · 01/12/2015 19:50

I have been laughing so much as these posts(Possibly due to tiredness aswell) my little boy slept through from probably 3-5 months now wakes every SINGLE night if i havnt completely knackerd him out before he goes to bed. The sleep deprivation is awful and when i hear crying through the baby monitor for the 5th time,mutter under my breath FOR FUCK SAKE( just incase hubby was enjoying the land of nod abit too much)!! 100% agree with people that hate friends when they claim to be tired because they were out getting pissed all weekend or have been at work for 3 days on 9-5 (WHICH HAS A BEGINNING AND END TIME). As much i love my other half i dont half want to punch him in his well rested, glowing face when he says 'aww he slept through'. No, he didnt sleep through... YOU FUCKING DID!! Angry

Purpleboa · 03/12/2015 01:01

Ha ha Mol!

In need of a rant. Usual shit sleep has just got worse this week. I have no fucking idea why, but it's fucking killing me. I do everything I can to get her to sleep and she fights it. All. The. Time. Then she has the audacity to yawn away!!!! Argh!!!!

I hate this. I HATE it. It's ruining being a mum for me and I just know it's going to kill me.