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Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 2. ALL welcome!

(945 Posts)
AMS19 Mon 18-Jan-21 13:37:33

Hi ladies

This thread is open for EVERYONE. To discuss the highs, lows, emotions, and experiences of us all going through our miscarriage journey. Together we will get through this!

Previous thread:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/4119053-Support-thread-for-those-experiencing-or-recently-experienced-a-MC-MMC?pg=1

To my incredible strong warriors...I cannot believe we filled a thread! We've got this ladies ❤
@DMT1982
@Scottishskifun
@glowingtwig
@mia2201
@Redfoxinthesnow
@Seasalt1984
@laurat94
@tamsin424
@cocoloco88
@SuzieDeLaTour
@Cordial11
@seasalt1984
@thehotelcalifornia
@TheDaydreamBelievers
@Pettylamby
@Lililou
@Enola41
@CocoLoco88
@Nicolamac1
@Sleeeeeepy
@Mellous
@Nicolamac1
@Semla
@Seasidestarfruit
@mummydoingamasters
@elm7
@MrsD1992
@CookieMonster3001
@Dryshampoo32

Sincere apologies for missing anyone xx

OP’s posts: |
AMS19 Mon 18-Jan-21 13:59:45

So following on the conversation from the last thread, seems like some of us might be gearing up for ovulation. @TheDaydreamBelievers I know you've gone for it. Anyone else? I'm still getting positive pregnancy tests so think my body is getting carried away.

@SuzieDeLaTour that is so interesting about the 2 sperm thing! I'm not even getting negative pregnancy tests and I'm already stress about how I'll feel following a new positive!

OP’s posts: |
Pettylamby Mon 18-Jan-21 14:12:59

@AMS19 I'm sure I read somewhere that you can ovulate with small levels of Hcg in your system! And your body is determined to get preggo again so it makes sense it starts to ramp up and hormones start!

I've got fingers crossed for a 'not pregnant' on a digi on Thursday... 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻

@SuzieDeLaTour honestly it was ridiculous... Im a snotty blotchy crying mess and he turns to me and says if you can get a hard on out of this... lifts covers - points at flaccid penis then go for it... And I did my best work and that was that! 😂😂

Pettylamby Mon 18-Jan-21 14:22:52

Oops meant to post this here... 🙈

@TheHotelCalifornia so glad you are feeling at peace! I think I feel much the same especially with appreciating the little things!

Defo get a dog as well... I have a golden retriever who's 8 now, got him when he was 8 weeks old, and honestly this sounds pathetic but I love him so much!

He is company around the house, he gets me out everyday and I hugged his neck and cried when I got home after finding out we were having a miscarriage!

Dogs are the best! 😊

AMS19 Mon 18-Jan-21 14:24:38

@Pettylamby that story actually made me laugh out loud!!
Got everything crossed for you. I didnt text this morning but testing again tomorrow so hoping for a lighter test! 🙏🤞 my tests are very light so assuming the hcg levels are super low now!

OP’s posts: |
LauraT94 Mon 18-Jan-21 14:43:37

Just marking my place!

Desperately trying to catch up on uni work after 5 weeks off 😩😬😩

TheDaydreamBelievers Mon 18-Jan-21 14:58:23

Sorry I thought I'd posted a comment here already. Hahahah @Pettylamby I should have gone for the pity sex!!! @suziedelatour - I havent had AF yet (7 weeks post surgery) but my temps and apps think I recently ovulated

SuzieDeLaTour Mon 18-Jan-21 15:25:27

@Pettylamby ahhhh that’s made me laugh!!! I love that you did your best work 🤣🤣 that’s the beauty of men - fairly easy creatures to work 😜 I love golden retrievers! There is something so soothing about a doggie cuddle when you’re feeling down! Xx

SuzieDeLaTour Mon 18-Jan-21 15:26:17

@AMS19 good luck with the testing tomorrow - that’s great the line is getting lighter...almost there now!! 🙌🏻🙌🏻

Scottishskifun Mon 18-Jan-21 15:29:22

Hi Ladies I have finally made it out of the house for a walk after 2 weeks. Bloody freezing up here but a walk along the beach and through the woods with the dog has helped a lot (I live in a seaside town in North East Scotland). Quite knackered now!

I'm still off work but I'm doing better now energy levels have started coming back up again. Not done any tests but started reacting to gluten again so hormones must be dropping. Still struggling to sleep I hope this goes soon as getting really peed off with not getting to sleep til 2/3am despite being in bed from 10pm because I feel tired hmmangry

LauraT94 Mon 18-Jan-21 15:46:08

@AMS19 I really hope your test is a BFN!!

@TheHotelCalifornia what a lovely story that you might be getting a dog! That's so so lovely.

@Pettylamby fingers crossed for your Thursday test also!

Contractions have hit me hard again in the middle of finally doing uni work and I'm crying I'm so frustrated and upset at it!! Have given in and called the EPU as I'm just so fed up. Everything I've read online says I shouldn't be in this much pain still and I've started passing small clots again similar to what I had pre-MVA. I'm 85% certain I've got retained tissue and i can't even explain how gutted I am to have gone through the MVA and still be in this position 😭😭😭 pity party for one over here!!

Scottishskifun Mon 18-Jan-21 16:02:33

@LauraT94 hope EPU can help and definitely worth getting checked. I think it can happen as although they check even a small amount can cause continuation. Your definitely not having a pity party!

I get it completely I wanted to avoid going back to the trauma unit so much as I wanted it to be over. But it will be over quicker by getting it checked out although it doesn't feel like it

Mellous Mon 18-Jan-21 16:09:33

Hi all

Just finished catching up on the previous thread!

@TheHotelCalifornia loved your post, all of what you said makes me feel better too! And get the dog. I was saying to my husband this morning, if it wasn't for our dog we would probably lay in bed struggling to find the motivation to get up, moping around, etc but we know we have to get up to look after him! He gives us something else to focus on.

I'm 1 week post surgery today, still having to wear a pad as I'm still getting some dark/brown blood. I've been wearing a pad now for like 3 weeks almost (started bleeding lightly before surgery). It's getting on my nerves.

With this pregnancy we didn't use OPKs or really track ovulation. I just tracked my cycle using Flo so had a rough idea when ovulation might be. We got lucky enough to fall pregnant, but yesterday I ordered ovulation sticks etc off Amazon. I am definitely getting ahead of myself as I've not taken a preg test yet or even stopped bleeding, but I won't have a clue what's going on with my cycle now, so figured they might help when it comes to trying again.

I got upset last night whilst browsing Instagram. I had to unfollow a few influencer type accounts that I was following as they are pregnant and were triggering me. Anyways, silly me went onto their accounts last night and it felt like a punch to the heart seeing all their happy pregnancy posts. One of the ladies must only be around 2 weeks ahead of where I should have been by now.

Despite that blip, I'm definitely crying less and my husband has even seen glimpses of my usual happier self coming back smile.

I hope you are all OK! xxx

Mellous Mon 18-Jan-21 16:20:57

Also, does anybody else keep comparing everything they do to 'when i was pregnant'?!

Went for a walk yesterday, and the route we took I actually did most mornings in December but hadn't done for a few weeks. Doing that same walk yesterday, my head was thinking 'ah, the last time I did this I was happy and pregnant!'.

I keep thinking back to everything I did Christmas Day, when I still thought things were OK.

I just keep thinking about how happy I was for those 7 or so weeks between getting a BFP to finding out the bad news. I miss feeling like that.

AMS19 Mon 18-Jan-21 16:29:22

@LauraT94 oh no!!! That definitely shouldn't be happening. I got no cramps after my MVA at all. What have EPU said?

@Mellous I do that all the time!! I had chicken nuggets from mcdonalds Friday and said to my husband "the last time I had these I was pregnant and they helped my nausea." Hopefully it won't be long until we are pregnant again and make new memories xx

OP’s posts: |
MandsH Mon 18-Jan-21 16:55:10

Hi ladies. I hope its okay me joining. Would love to have a little reassurance right now. So I’m 4+4 weeks past MVA after a MMC at 10+3, baby measured 6+3. I was back at the EPU on Friday as still getting positive tests and had a yellow mucusy discharge that morning. HCG was at 15 and the scan showed “small fragments floating about which should hopefully be flushed out when my period comes”. They weren’t concerned of me having an infection as no temp or signs and sent me on my way. Weirdly the discharge didn’t appear again over weekend only just now again and have some incredibly mild lower abdominal pain (although may be stress related as I’m seriously fixating on the area!). Anyway my question is has anyone else had this yellow mucousy discharge? And has anyone else been told some very small fragments remained and their next period sorted it out? Want to make sure I’m not being fobbed off by the EPU. Really struggling with anxiety since the MC as it is. Thank you x

LauraT94 Mon 18-Jan-21 17:26:42

Back in hospital. Had the good fortune to turn up just as they were doing meds rounds on the ward so am in for a little wait!

They said the level of pain sounds 'concerning' this many days after the op. So they want to do bloods to check for infection markers and they want to have a little feel of my tummy.

They said I'll most likely be able to go home tonight but they might need me back in tomorrow for an ultrasound. Will keep you guys updated!

Pain lessened on my journey to hospital but is back again. Which I'm almost glad about?! Started to feel like I'd made it up for a second 😂

AMS19 Mon 18-Jan-21 17:29:05

@MandsH hi and welcome. I'm so so sorry for what has happened to you. I also had a MVA 3 weeks go Thursday. I havebt hadn't discharge as such but the spotting has been a questionable colour at times, more yellow than brown. But completely odourless so wasn't concerned on infection . In terms of leftover products, yes. I was told exactly the same after my MVA. They scanned me after the procedure and said anything left would be small enough to come out with my next period. I am still getting a positive but it is very light and I am very early days still. But sounds like what they said aligns to what I was told x

OP’s posts: |
AMS19 Mon 18-Jan-21 17:30:34

@LauraT94 definitely best to get it looked at! I sometimes think half the pain/feelings are made worst by the worrying and not knowing what is happening. So hopefully this will help one way or the other!! Xx

OP’s posts: |
LauraT94 Mon 18-Jan-21 17:35:20

@MandsH hopefully the pain is AF on the way and if EPU said the yellowy discharge was ok I'd trust them I think! Hope it settles down soon/AF arrives and gives you a lovely fresh cycle and fresh lining!

@Mellous I can't help but compare everything to when I was pregnant!! I think even OH must be sick of it haha.

@Scottishskifun I'm glad you managed to get out and about today! It really does help you feel a bit better doesn't it?! I think it'll take a while to build energy levels up again. Pre and during pregnancy I was walking at least an hour every time I went out. Managed half an hour on Sunday (although walking a very pully dog) and was exhausted!

LauraT94 Mon 18-Jan-21 18:03:44

all moving quickly here. Spoken to doctor, bloods done and I'm just waiting on her to get me some stronger pain meds. I'm allowed to go home after that and they'll call me if there's anything in my blood! And get me back in tomorrow for an emergency ultrasound x

AMS19 Mon 18-Jan-21 18:13:31

Great stuff @LauraT94

OP’s posts: |
Scottishskifun Mon 18-Jan-21 18:14:44

@LauraT94 glad that you have been seen quickly and they are being helpful in arranging things hopefully the stronger pain meds will help.

Yes I feel better for going out I had been trying for a few days but never mustered the energy til today. Hoping to try a distanced walk with my friend later in the week. She is on mat leave with her 6 month old rainbow baby and is pretty isolated especially during the week so will be nice to see her and she completely understands.

SuzieDeLaTour Mon 18-Jan-21 19:32:47

@LauraT94 oh I’m glad you’re headed home - good that you’ve got stronger meds. Fingers crossed bloods come back ok 👌🏻 x

Enola41 Mon 18-Jan-21 19:38:28

Have had a few bad days mentally. I suffered badly from anxiety and panic disorder when I was in my 20's. I managed to get it under control but have always been aware that it sat in the background. The stress of everything had set off all the symptoms. I've had a headache since Thursday and it hasn't gone away, I'm convinced that every little twinge or pain is something majorly wrong with me. I keep bursting into tears. I'm being useless as a mum to my daughter. I just want to cry. Exercise would be the best thing but I can't even do that at the moment. sad Sorry just having a bad day.

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