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To think if you want your own snacks in the house you can buy them yourself?

(361 Posts)
notyoursnackbitch Mon 17-Feb-20 15:49:36

We have two very young DC. I plan and cook all meals, including doing the online food shop. I also work 4 days a week. DH works long hours from home 5 days a week.

He has just stormed out of the kitchen because he "never has any fucking food in this house" after I told him not to eat the snacks I was about to give DC.

AIBU to think at, approaching 40, he can buy his own fucking snacks if he wants them? Am I now everyone's personal snack bitch? And why would he think it's reasonable to eat food that's been bought for our 1 year old?!

Trahira Mon 17-Feb-20 15:51:58

Sorry OP, but I think you're being a little unreasonable here. I mean if you think he's not doing enough towards the household in general then you should bring that up with him for sure. But if you're happy doing the cooking and meal planning and it generally works well, then I'd find it weird to tell him he couldn't eat a snack from the cupboard!

Stickybeaksid Mon 17-Feb-20 15:52:07

Why do you not just buy snacks for everyone of you are doing a shop? If it’s online it must only take two secs to ask everyone if they want anything specific and add it to the basket.

Geminijes Mon 17-Feb-20 15:54:19

Just order some adult snacks when you do the online shop. It's not difficult.

Morgan12 Mon 17-Feb-20 15:54:29

Why can't you just buy him some snacks when you do the shopping?

I do the online shop for my family so I ask my husband if there is anything specific he wants before I do it.

BuzzShitbagBobbly Mon 17-Feb-20 15:55:04

after I told him not to eat the snacks I was about to give DC.

These were the only snacks in the entire house and you were in the act of giving them to the children when he swooped in?

FFS OP, just buy more snacks so everyone has some.

notyoursnackbitch Mon 17-Feb-20 15:56:52

I ask him what he wants when doing the online shop. I order biscuits, for him. Crisps, for him. He already ate them all last week. He's not confined to the house day and night, we live 2 minutes from a shop and if I want something for myself, I go and buy it.

tealandteal Mon 17-Feb-20 15:57:31

Depends on the situation really. If he gives you no input he can't expect the food we wants to be there. Similarly if he has eaten all the good snacks. However if he doesn't have a chance to amend the online shop or add to the shopping list, or you're about to reveal you have 12 packets of biscuits in the cupboard but their only for your consumption, that would be unreasonable. In this house DH would be in the wrong as we plan the fortnightly shop together and if he didn't order enough snacks or has eaten them all, then he can't eat children's snacks.

Frenchw1fe Mon 17-Feb-20 16:14:49

keep bread in the freezer and when he runs out of snacks suggest he makes toast.

femidom12 Mon 17-Feb-20 16:16:35

LTB

DenimDrift Mon 17-Feb-20 16:16:35

what snacks were you about to give the kids anyway?

WorraLiberty Mon 17-Feb-20 16:19:58

If you do the online shopping and his snacks aren't lasting, he should really ask you to get more confused

Or is that too simple and I've missed something?

WhyDidIStartDecorating Mon 17-Feb-20 16:26:57

I would just ( and do) just order a selection of snacks and bits for everyone when doing the shopping.
Plus resists the temptation of dh going and fancying something and buying a tonne of crap.. Not in a control way as of course he can go whenever he wants. But last time he fancied something treat like.. He spent £26 on cakes, biscuits and chocolate.

opticaldelusion Mon 17-Feb-20 16:28:32

He must be desperate if he's prepared to eat Pombears..

MyDcAreMarvel Mon 17-Feb-20 16:31:04

Don’t be ridiculous i can’t believe you told a grown man he can’t eat food in his/your own house.

toomuchtooold Mon 17-Feb-20 16:31:11

If he wants more snacks he could ask you nicely to put them on the shopping order. He's being a dickhead.

Divebar Mon 17-Feb-20 16:32:11

I quite fancy being a snack bitch...anyway I’m in a similar situation to you hours wise and I also do the meal planning and online food shop. I do this religiously every Thursday morning from the train. I keep
a shopping list in the kitchen and send out a reminder text every week before sending the order - if he doesn’t write it down and tell me what he wants then I’m not a mind reader and tough shit.

GrannyBags Mon 17-Feb-20 16:32:26

We have a whiteboard in the kitchen and DH and DS write on it what they would like me to put in the Tesco order. Simple

NurseButtercup Mon 17-Feb-20 16:32:31

Is this argument really about lack of snacks when there is a shop 2 minutes away?

HavelockVetinari Mon 17-Feb-20 16:33:35

Don’t be ridiculous i can’t believe you told a grown man he can’t eat food in his/your own house.

hmm the DC's snacks?? Really? So if the man of the house wants food he must be able to eat whatever he wants immediately, even if that means the DC go without till the next shop?

LolaSmiles Mon 17-Feb-20 16:35:32

If you do the online shopping and his snacks aren't lasting, he should really ask you to get more
That's what I thought. He should saying something runs out and the OP should just order each week.

I ask him what he wants when doing the online shop. I order biscuits, for him. Crisps, for him. He already ate them all last week
Last week? If DH got annoyed at me because I had eaten the snacks from last week and started listing snacks he bought last week as being bought "for me" then i'd be quite annoyed.
It's online shopping. It's hardly you going out of your way to click a few buttons when you're doing the family shop online.

BarbaraofSeville Mon 17-Feb-20 16:37:56

He knows what was bought and he knows that he's eaten it, so he wants to take his DCs snacks out of their mouths?

If he wants something specific/more when the OP asks him about the online shop, that's the time to mention it. He must know that you're an 'once a week online shopping' household. Or does he think it all arrives by magic without any thought or effort involved?

Or he could get off his arse and go to the shop himself. I doubt very much he is working every single minute of his 'long hours important man job' so 5 minutes to go to the shop would be a nice break for him, no?

SpruceTree Mon 17-Feb-20 16:37:59

Why would you not let your husband eat food that's in the house? It's not like you are student housemates with separate shelves in the fridge and cupboard or something. Are you married and presumably like to do nice things for each other or are you divorced/separating and living separate but in the same house for the sake of the kids or something? It really sounds as though you can't stand him OP.

bigchris Mon 17-Feb-20 16:38:51

Oh my dh is like this
He does the online shop
Treats me like the third teenager 'yourenkteating that are you it's for lunch tomorrow ' etc

bigchris Mon 17-Feb-20 16:39:23

you're not eating that are you

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