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Bridesmaid posted a photo of my dress on Facebook

(830 Posts)
Titsntats Sat 15-Jun-19 07:21:29

I know I probably am but just wanted to hear others opinions on whether they would be sad about it or if I just need to get a grip!

Getting married soon and after trying on a lot of different dresses I finally found the one, something I never thought I would due to being very body conscious and anxious. Went back for final fitting at the weekend and took one of my bridesmaids as she wanted to see

After finishing the appointment and getting home I saw that she had posted a photo of me in the dress on Facebook (during the appointment so it had already been on an hour or two when I saw it) and tagged my partner in it saying she bets he couldn’t wait to marry me and how lovely my dress is. When I asked her to remove it her response was ‘it doesn’t matter if he’s seen it he’s a man so he will have forgotten what it looks like in 5 minutes time’. My dad had also seen it as well and it was going to be a surprise for him on the day too

I just don’t know what to do or how to feel! I am so gutted that it now won’t be a surprise to my partner or my dad. She knew how much that meant to me and the only thing I had asked for was that details of how I will look on the day were kept a surprise from my dad and partner. As I paid in instalments the dress is now fully paid for and I don’t have time to get another one and do all the alterations etc. Someone tell me I will stop feeling like this soon!

Nanny0gg Sat 15-Jun-19 07:23:23

I hope you will, but she's a cow and should no longer be your bridesmaid.

Your day will still be special though. I promise!

MrsW85 Sat 15-Jun-19 07:23:30

I would be furious! I'd be seriously considering if she would be coming to the wedding!

steff13 Sat 15-Jun-19 07:23:40

It doesn't matter in the long run. But I how devastated you must feel. I don't think she sounds like much of a friend, personally.

RickAstleyGaveMeUp Sat 15-Jun-19 07:24:12

Sack the bridesmaid angry don't worry, your dress will look different when your hair and makeup are done etc. Try not to let it spoil the day.

Bodear Sat 15-Jun-19 07:24:13

When did all this happen OP? Has the photo been taken down?

Sirzy Sat 15-Jun-19 07:24:31

I would be angry at that one.

You don’t share pictures of someone else’s wedding dress before the wedding!

I would make it very clear on the the wedding day that NO pictures of the bridal party are to be shared on Facebook until you and/or your partner have done so!

IceCreamSoda99 Sat 15-Jun-19 07:24:38

She a massive b*tch or a complete idiot, I'd be furious and you are not unreasonable in the slightest! Did she take it down? If not report the image.

TestingTestingWonTooFree Sat 15-Jun-19 07:25:27

Very bad form on her part. What’s done is done. You can either let it spoil your wedding or you can get over it. I’d try and get over it.

Ihatehashtags Sat 15-Jun-19 07:25:35

That is a bitchy horrible thing to do. She definitely wouldn’t be my bridesmaid any more

MrsMozartMkII Sat 15-Jun-19 07:25:38

I'd ditch her.

To break her promise and your trust like that is horrible and not what a friend should even think of doing.

NauseousMum Sat 15-Jun-19 07:25:46

She's an attention seeking POS. She wanted the likes and to be the first to show. You have every right to feel disapointed and hurt. If i saw a photo like that i would think your bridesmaid was a shit friend and attention seeker!

Pearlfish Sat 15-Jun-19 07:25:54

I would be gutted about this.

strawbmilk Sat 15-Jun-19 07:26:03

It is beyond me how someone would think this is ok even if you hadn't specifically said a surprise shockshockshockshockshock

DappledThings Sat 15-Jun-19 07:26:12

I was really relaxed about my wedding and find about 90% of people complaining about guests' behaviour are being really silly but I'd be furious about this.

converseandjeans Sat 15-Jun-19 07:26:23

I'm not especially fussed about wedding dresses etc but still think this is way out of order. She actually tagged your husband to be?! It's really bizarre behaviour. YANBU to be feeling upset.

qj17 Sat 15-Jun-19 07:26:25

Ditch her I'd be fuming!

mademoisellegazelle Sat 15-Jun-19 07:26:29

She wouldn't have a part in my wedding. She's either a vindictive cow, an idiot or both.

TinselTimes Sat 15-Jun-19 07:26:47

If honestly sack her as a Bridesmaid for that, and I was super relaxed about my wedding.

user1485155939 Sat 15-Jun-19 07:26:54

I'm sorry but she should not be your friend or bridesmaid - I can't believe someone would do that.

Your dress is your secret until the day of the wedding.

Do you think maybe she is jealous that you are getting married because there really is no excuse for posting and tagging your dress on facebook.

Hope you have a lovely wedding day despite your so called friend 💐

TinselTimes Sat 15-Jun-19 07:26:58

I meant I’d.

chipscheesegravy Sat 15-Jun-19 07:27:46

She 100% knew what she was doing. It's common knowledge no one sees the dress let alone the groom! I'd be furious!

Turniptracker Sat 15-Jun-19 07:28:54

Wtaf I would be fuming!!! So sorry she ruined your surprise like that, what a selfish and thoughtless "friend". Pure moron or vindictive cow

Sparkletastic Sat 15-Jun-19 07:28:56

This sounds like deliberate sabotage. I would tell her she's no longer a bridesmaid. Are there any ways that you could accessorise the dress differently? I know you are sad that the surprise element is gone but your wedding day will still be the first time your DP and DF see you in your dress in 3D. As long as you feel beautiful that's all that matters.

Laura221 Sat 15-Jun-19 07:29:01

I'm so sorry. You have every right to be upset. I dont have any wisdom on how to react unfortunately. I guess you have two options, one be absolutely furious and tell your bridesmaid it was totally unacceptable which will make you and her upset and probably taint the while day for you or quietly explain to her that its upset you but try and just put it down to one of those things and move on and have a great day x

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