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To request mumsnet to add a 'polyamorous families' section under parenting?

(869 Posts)
whycantwegoonasthree Sat 05-Mar-16 15:28:08

There's every other kind of family type, pretty much, and polyamorous families have some unique joys and challenges that it would be nice to share and discuss.

Or maybe we're the last frontier and even MN aren't ready to go there.


UnmentionedElephantDildo Sat 05-Mar-16 15:33:09

You need to start a thread in Site Issues, or report your post, if you want MNHQ to read it.

WorraLiberty Sat 05-Mar-16 15:33:28

Probably too niche

There are so many topics already that hardly anyone uses - hence AIBU and Chat being so busy.

HermioneJeanGranger Sat 05-Mar-16 15:35:46

Can't you just use Parenting or relationships? It's too niche, really. It wouldn't get much traffic.

UmbongoUnchained Sat 05-Mar-16 15:37:27

What is polyamorous?

whycantwegoonasthree Sat 05-Mar-16 15:37:35

Thought I'd get a straw poll on whether anyone else would be interested.

I'm pretty sure I'm not the only person on here in a poly relationship but there aren't really any safe places to discuss it.

It doesn't go down well on the 'relationships' section, lemme tell you. Over there either poly = cheating or someone's being taken advantage of.

And it has some specific parenting challenges.

There's an entirely seperate board for questions about the site. Suggest you go there.

Or you could start a thread?

One of the things I liked best when I joined MN was that there was no specific "Young Parents" section like there is on The Other Forum - despite young parents also having unique joys and challenges.

I doubt it's anything to do with Mumsnet not being ready to "go there", wherever "there" is, and more to do with a) there not being enough demand and b) not having any issues with polyamorous families starting their own threads.

phequer Sat 05-Mar-16 15:38:40

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Kewcumber Sat 05-Mar-16 15:41:50

Why would it be under "parenting"? confused

I wouldn't expect Desperate for a Shag but Too Tired to Arrange a Babysitter and find Someone Available to go under "Parenting"

I mean I get that it's more of a lifestyle choice than my example but surely it's not a parenting issue - unless you're roping your children in which would be a whole other kettle of fish altogether

Pipbin Sat 05-Mar-16 15:42:01

What is polyamorous?

Relationships of more than two people.

I do understand what you mean OP. You need somewhere to talk about parenting within this kind of family group without explaining how it works, that you really are happy and without being judged.

As said above, start a post on Site Stuff to get MNHQ to notice.

whycantwegoonasthree Sat 05-Mar-16 15:42:31

Umbongo - polyamory is when people are in committed, loving relationships with more than one person with the full knowledge and consent of all those involved.

As I said, this is a toe in the water to gauge interest and yes, I may start a thread in Parenting and hope it's not as risky as mentioning it in the 'Relationships' section.

WorraLiberty Sat 05-Mar-16 15:44:33

Kewcumber, the OP said polyamorous, not dogging grin

phequer Sat 05-Mar-16 15:44:46

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Kewcumber Sat 05-Mar-16 15:45:34

Most people find threads through active don't they?

Just start a thread entitled "For discussion of people in polyamorous relationships who want to discuss parenting issues" and see who joins in.

Kewcumber Sat 05-Mar-16 15:46:28

I suppose I hadn't grasped the living in the same house thing. Relationships aren't just about people who live together!

whycantwegoonasthree Sat 05-Mar-16 15:48:52

We're in two separate houses, (no desire or plans for a fully cohabiting poly setup) and there are two young children and two teenagers between us.

The teenagers know about and are happy with the setup - they're not mine but we go to stuff together sometimes and get on well.

The little ones don't yet, but we'd all like them to, in time.

So yes, there are unique parenting challenges, and yes it would be nice to discuss them somewhere where we wouldn't have to continually defend ourselves.

Lweji Sat 05-Mar-16 15:48:58

I think starting a specific thread is a good idea, rather than a board. I suspect a board would be too quiet. Probably you and few people if only for parenting. A Polyamorous board might get more traffic, but then it would have more than parenting.

SoConfused15 Sat 05-Mar-16 15:50:01

Are you out to your kids OP? Just curious. I am poly but my kids don't know and they haven't met my secondary partner. It's a tricky situation.

whycantwegoonasthree Sat 05-Mar-16 15:51:58

Leweji - you may be right (you probably are) but where would a polyamory board sit? Body and soul perhaps?

There are certainly things to discuss besides parenting challenges in a poly setup!

And actually remarkably few places where one can discuss them. And I come to MN to discuss pretty much everything else in life, so why not this?

WorraLiberty Sat 05-Mar-16 15:52:27

I'm not sure having a specific topic would mean you wouldn't have to continually defend yourselves, especially with so many goady fuckers and trolls around.

The FWR topic springs to mind. Apparently that gets trolled a lot.

MaudGonneMad Sat 05-Mar-16 15:53:11

No-one's saying you can't discuss it.

whycantwegoonasthree Sat 05-Mar-16 15:55:12

SoConfused - HELLO!!!

No, not to mine, it's complicated by my ex's religious beliefs and also they're a little young to understand it.

The children (teenagers) from the other two members of our 'V' are fully aware, have met me, and we're astonishingly unfazed when told. "Yeah, poly's a thing. So, ok, cool, whatever."

They're remarkably ace kids though.

Kewcumber Sat 05-Mar-16 15:56:36

Lordy the adoption board gets trolled from time to time. Not just from proper trolly trolls but just people who don;t agree with it. There is no escape from that by sticking it in its own board.

whycantwegoonasthree Sat 05-Mar-16 15:59:01

What was the FWR board? And yes, almost definitely prone to trolling. Not necessarily a reason not to go there though. Do the LGBT boards get trolled too?

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