SAHM back to work support thread

[GlumyGloomer]

Wondering if any other SAHM's are thinking of getting back to work/retraining? I'm finding it terrifying, and looking for a safe space to chat.

I'm in the fortunate position that I can take a couple of years to retrain before needing to get a job. This seemed like a great way to overcome the CV gap, and I was quite excited about having a profession. A road block's come up as the course provider informed me at the last minute that I need a mentor to shadow whilst doing the course. Tomorrow I have to start phoning around to see if anyone might be interested in letting a random dumpy late thirties mum (pretty sure it would be an easier sell if I was attractive) tag along with them at work for 2 years.
After 6 years at home my confidence is on the floor, I can barely remember what made me employable, let alone convince anyone else 😫

@UnicornsDoExist ah sorry you had a bad day. Hopefully today is better and it's nearly the weekend. It can be really tough getting up to speed, so frustrating when they expect you to know it all without training. Hang in there, things will get better

@UnicornsDoExist That sounds rough. Don’t worry though I think that’s normal for early days. Soon you’ll feel confident to tell them what’s what. At the moment I’m guessing you have to be on best behaviour 🤣 it’ll all come good. And at the end of the day you’ve made some money for yourself and family so it’s worth it.

Hi can I join please. Got a return to nursing interview after being a SAHM for 15 years. Interview is on Monday and I am bricking it. I keep swinging
from I can do it to thinking what the hell am I doing! Well done to all the other poster's who are returning back to work, you are inspiring

Good luck @clakster14 you’ll do fantastic! Hard to make that first move isn’t it. Sure you’ll be back into it in no time.

Yes, I'm sure you're right @UnicornsDoExist and it's better to be up-front about what I want at interview than say nothing and then flounder and fail. I just know that after having me at home picking up all the house, garden and DC-related stuff that DH won't suddenly start doing half the laundry, half the shopping, cook half the meals (he can't cook anyway), just because I've gone back to work and I honestly don't want me returning to work to turn into a battleground of arguments over chores. I hope things improve for you and @GypsyWanderer at work and good luck with your interview @clakster14.

Thankyou everyone am really lacking in confidence today, trying to think of the end result x

You can do this Clakster! Are you going pt or ft? You’ve taken that first step! 🙌🏻

I think if you are FT he will need to make some kind of contribution to the chores he can’t expect you to continue to do everything?!

Definitely! But make sure you don’t just start doing his share and expect him to realise, generally speaking men don’t till you tell them directly. Have a conversation about it beforehand. If his share of chores isn’t done then leave it. He will soon get the picture.

Dh did a full factory reset on his old lap top today, and set it up as mine for studying. I've not had my own lap top since the pre-kids one died, so that was strange. It's still sitting on the kitchen table as I can't think òf a safe but accessible place to keep it. A couple of years ago we went from a 1 bed to a bigger house, and we still have hardly any furniture.

@clakster14 good luck with the interview, you can do it!

Can you get a good sleeve/case for it? In case the kids do get hold of it etc.

That is a very good idea, Mol

so I have done a couple of weeks almost now.

Emotions vary from crying and saying I can’t cope to being excited and feeling positive.

I feel out of my depth like I’m meant to know what I’m doing by now and I don’t.

Well done for getting through first couple of weeks, @Mol1628 , I'm sure you're doing great. It can take a while to really get to grips with a new place so don't stress.

Nothing much to report on my end, been busy with kids. I emailed my mentor yesterday about insurance, and he replied so at least that seems on track still. Kids back to school soon, so will make a start on driving theory then.

Just popping back to say hi, I’m 4 weeks in now. It’s been tough adapting to back to work. They are extremely short staffed and can’t get anyone with the experience needed so I’ve been doing extra days which i really didn’t want as a two day commute is enough for me. They also tend to keep me late and break times are not ironed out so there are things I’m not happy with.
im really enjoying the job itself and feels like I’m getting back into the work. I have noticed some of the younger staff are a bit disrespectful towards me and as my husband says they are picking up on my lack of confidence.
so my advice is same as above, fake it til you make it! Act confident! You can do this!!! 💪🏻

We had a rare quiet half hour the other day and had a bit of banter and chitchat and it dawned on me how much I have missed that! Adult conversation! It was great

I was called in to the office and asked to work from home on top of my usual two days which is exactly what I had hoped for all along, so they must be happy with my performance!

the first month was hard but it’s getting easier with time.

That’s great to hear you’re getting on so well. You’re right it’s never going to be easy. You’ve done well to push through it. Hopefully the pay at the end of the four weeks helped!

My main concern is I’ve been given a lot of responsibility straight away and the supervisor I was left with on Friday can’t even do the part of the job I’m meant to do. So I’m worried after the first day left on my own I’m going to have loads of crap to deal with Monday and get the blame. So now it’s the weekend and I feel sick about going in Monday. I’m shattered.

Is the supervisor your junior or are you doing her job?

She’s the area supervisor above me. But for some reason she can’t do the specific area I’m working on.

You don't have to be a Supermodel to be in employment. If you shadow a woman, she won't care what you like you. It must be scary taking the leap back into the workplace after a long period of time away. Good luck with it :-)

Can I join? I have been a sahm for 6 years. I actually (by a minor miracle) landed a 6 month contract working from home for an old boss last year but I don't think there will be much work there this year as she is a consultant herself, she was temporarily covering a role and the replacement she hired for herself in that role doesn't really need me - we have very similar skill sets.

I need to look at temporary contracts and freelance work as I am in the US and a full time position here is way to inflexible with almost no annual leave.

@Aria999 That’s good though something is better than nothing. Keep an eye out whilst your currently working. Things often lead to other things.

Can I join? I am really struggling with finding a new role after redundancy. Every interview they mention my gaps (maternity etc).

I do marketing and I live in the SW where roles are few and far between. And very very low paid. It's so backwards here, there's still stigma about women going back to work & huge stigma about part time hours.

I just cried. I know I'm unemployable. And 36. Applying for WFH remote roles isn't getting me anywhere either.

I have 16 years marketing and digital marketing experience. I'm happy to do admin or whatever. I'm happy to retrain but no idea what my transferable skills are. I have MS and it just makes things even worse for me..

Anyway, thank you for letting me rant. I'm usually a jolly soul, I swear! 😂

How do parents manage their childcare in the USA?

Welcome! Check out some of the NHS new roles. They have a few that training is given (care coordinator which I am, social prescribing link worker, well-being coach) where the NHS have been given funding and they’re based all over. Im using it as a stepping stone into the NHS and learning loads so far.

Hey @GypsyWanderer thank you for your reply. Just had a look for those roles as they sound great! But none in my entire region. I checked the NHS job website, where did you find them advertised? Maybe they're hidden away.

I know a lot about social prescribing due to a previous comms CIC role I had. I'd be absolutely over the moon with a role like that.