I think childcare and postive exemplars also have a bearing on whether or not you feel good. I totally agree with SofiaAmes when she says she'd kill the children if she stayed at home and the positive example she had of her own working mother.
My mother always worked (or was a full time student when I was very wee) - and I never felt neglected. In fact I never saw it as "my mother works", I saw it as "my parents work" - why should my mum be different to my dad? As I said at my first interview at ICI on the milk round, when they, in a roundabout way, asked an illegal question (which they asked both sexes to get around it): my view to families and how that might impact my career path was that I wold intend to continue working as my mum had alwways worked and I reckoned I'd been brought up pretty well and was pretty well adjusted"
Childcare is also important: I had fantastic childcare with a childminder literally in the house next door. Ds was really happy going there: going in wiothout a backward glance but delighted to see me in the evening.
Now that ds is at school, juglling could have been more difficult, but dh is currently studying and starting to set up a business, so therefor at home, so is able to pick up most of the everyday getting to/from school typoe issues. Ican do them if he is away on a course, as there is a good breakfact club and after school club, and my SIL will pick him/keep him overnight if I need to do any business trips, but it does make things much easier if dh does them.
I do sometimes feel a wee bit jealous (which is not the same as guilt) about the extra time dh gets with ds - but most of the time it is the "dross" stuff he has to do with him - getting his school stuff ready, sorting out issues with the school etc. And it was a joint decision for me to work, to give dh the freedom to follow his dream of a career in wine.