Today I discovered that Hinge can delete your account if as a straight male you complain about males appearing in your dating queue…

[SingleSexSpacesInSchools]

I only discovered this after having made two reports, and it’s Sunday, so I suppose I’ll find out tomorrow if they are going to follow through.

• [This paragraph has been removed at the OP's request]

I'm sure someone will be along in a minute and ask why it has to be a thing in a relationship at all but given the case I’m following through it sort of has to be out there!

Raving try hard is what it is.

That’s now down as PBP. Who was the poster? Your comment reads like it was KSSSIS but he’s still here…

It's interesting that GCA's tend to frame men as predatory regardless of the circumstance.

Can't say I'd be keen on chasing this sort of conspiratorial tail if I was male.

That was to someone “hemlut” i think who had said they knew who Op is and could share this…
they also had another thread started about how evil JKR is.

Hinge, Bumble and Tinder all have an "inclusive" policy and believe TWAW. So it doesn't surprise me that you've had your profile deleted for daring to say anything.
I would welcome profiles that say "gender critical" etc, but I do find what you've written as quite performative. TBH if someone believes TWAW, all you need is "gender critical" to alert them to swipe left.

HeimatvonFanatikern (German for home of fanatics). There is a pattern of a poster using German usernames (yesterday we had KeinHasst [grammatically wrong]) but there were others before. It seems this is someone who was previously banned.

Oh I recognise this poster, yes, they are the one who is all about women’s rights, provided it specifically in relation to the trans issue. And they will ignore and shutdown any woman who disagrees with them. Or alternatively mansplain. They are no friend to women.

“I care about women’s rights, recognise that sex sometimes matters, and try not to lose kindness or nuance along the way. I love a good discussion, disagreement included, as long as we’re both curious.”

I would be put off because I don’t understand what you’re saying. Are you GC or not?

Ah nuance- so you mean that the post
”isn’t JKRs tone awful…. I mean am not asking you to say she is…. But should she be allowed to have such a tone in what she says”… ?

I'm reminded of a woman who told me that she was banned from a dating app, Tinder I think. She wrote her expectations in her profile and then would argue with men who messaged her but hadn't read her profile or didnt care. She couldn't understand anyone's point that she could surely just ignore the messages from unsuitable applicants or scroll past them. She didn't have to attack them for not meeting her needs in a dating partner.

I find it fascinating that so many ppl seem far more bothered about SSSS limiting his potential dating pool which affects no one but him whilst ignoring the obvious point that dating apps are making it impossible for ppl to filter for sex because they use gender instead

nothing personal SSSS but I couldn't give a toss if you can't get your end away but as I straight woman, I would care if a dating app included TM in my profile

Agree with this, from my memory op is a dad whoae daughter disagreed with being made to share pe changing room with male students,, some posters have taken umbrage with the campaign…. Because he’s a dad?… and felt the campaign was too focussed on trans issues, but I thought that was whole issue? Happy to be corrected!

It was about ensuring females and males had separate changing facilities I believe.

Disclaimer: nothing I say in this post is about trans issues in prisons.

All I will say is that my main feminist activism is around prisons, as some of you know. By that, I mean that is where I am most formally involved with women's issues, outside of being a woman. There are men who also have a "special interest" in female prisoners vs male or just prisoners overall. This can be for a range of genuine reasons.

But men are still men as most here will agree.

Irrespective of their motivation or intention, they can still be incredibly misogynistic. More so, sometimes, when they are certain of validation from at least some women. So you start to find that men with whom you share values and views are belittling women who disagree with you both about an issue she has far more right to speak on than he does.

I witnessed a guy I really liked do this about sex work where a woman disagreed with our views on legalisation etc.

When you've been around these men a few times, you start to see patterns and I guess you start to look out for certain behaviour. How do they speak to women who disagree with them? What are their general views on other subjects?

I thought the same. Gender critical (or sex realist) would tell me the crucial information without sounding over the top. I expect men to respect women, but don’t necessarily want him to claim to be all about women’s rights.

You need to be more subtle and include a pic of yourself in front of a bookcase. Make sure that a gender critical book (or one by JKR) can be seen well enough to be identified.

I think the "sex sometimes matters" line is open to misinterpretation, particularly on a dating app!

In my experience, it's so he can tailor the views to particular woman. So if one woman says it always matters, he can say he agrees. If another woman says it only matters in these circumstances, he can say he agrees with her that it only matters then.

My hinge account was deleted after I reported a guy for having his knob hanging out the bottom of his shorts on his profile picture. The only reason I think could be behind the deletion was I had in my bio "if you have to put pronouns in your bio, then you're not man enough for me!". I bet Mr Knobs Out is still there.

I was thinking rather more mundanely that it may be interpreted in terms of the importance of sex (having it, with people met on dating apps) rather than biological sex (being it).

As not everybody is well up on these issues.

Oh, true.