Different instinctive reactions to men and trans women in public

[Waheymum]

It's occurred to me that I have crossed the road to avoid potentially dodgy men countless times in my life, but never a transwoman, even though I know that transwomen pose exactly the same threats as men do. I'll notice transwomen and recognise that they are trans, but I don't have the same socially-conditioned flight response.

Does anyone else experience this?

I cross the road when someone looks dangerous or like they might obstruct me in some way. That's mostly men, but sometimes women. I've never noticed that the person making me avoid them is trans.

No. HTH

OP do you tend to think of TW as women?

Back when I tried to avoid 'misgendering' the only way I could do it was to mentally turn that man into a woman. In that case maybe I would not react to them in the same way as a man.

I know they're not actually biological women. I've only met one transwoman that passes (well, to my knowledge). I do try to avoid 'misgendering' though.

I try to avoid TW as much as possible, in my experience they are always looking around to gauge people’s reactions or hoping to get attention/interactions (whether positive or negative). So I just ignore, I don’t want to give them the satisfaction.

Do you think sometimes they might just be anxious about abuse? Or are you saying they (or at least some of them) want to be attacked here: "hoping to get attention/interactions (whether positive or negative)"

Ugh, I’ll avoid angry looking men however they dress.

The ones wearing frocks are far more likely to become aggressive if you don’t give them the attention they crave.

I mean, what fraction of men do you cross the road to avoid? For me it's well under 1% of all the men I encounter - I'd only cross the road if I actively felt uneasy about a particular man. Now how often do you (knowingly) encounter a transwoman? If 2% of all the men you encounter are transwomen - and that's surely an overestimate - and if you are equally likely to feel uneasy about them as about any other man, then you'd be crossing the road to avoid a transwoman on 2% of 1% of all the occasions when you encounter a man, or 1 in each 5000 times you encounter a man. How long does it take you to encounter 5000 men in situations where crossing the road to avoid them would be an option? For me that would be measured in decades, so I don't know how I'd go about making a statistical estimate of whether transwomen are more, less or equally likely to prompt me to cross than any other man. I kind of wonder why you're asking this question, tbh.

I'd say I avoid a maximum of 5% of the people I could pass. Most of them are men but some are women. Avoided a woman today.

When I see a transwoman I register a man in a dress and my flight instinct is activated.

how very transphobic of you to assume that a TW would present in a female manner

this feels like another in the standard line of 'gotchas' vis

"It's such a small number of men, I mean have you ever even met a TW? So you should stop being big meanies abd let them into all women's spaces - it's such a few ppl after all"

answer is still no

My instinctive reactions to two different types of men are pretty much the same.

I don’t tend to cross the road for anyone

my instinctive response to transwomen is just as cautious as it is to men in general

my husband however has a distinctly more suspicious reaction to transowmen than to men in general.

I don’t believe the flight response you experience is totally socially conditioned - although I agree there is an element as women are trained to be more fearful .

it’s interesting that you know the person is a man

I don’t generally cross the road to avoid anyone unless they’re actively annoying me or obviously drunk, high or psychotic - that’s only a few people on most trips to town. I have noticed that I feel more comfortable around FTM trans people than MTF, fwiw.

My dp’s uncle is trans, has been for many years, I have known him for many years and I am not scared of him at all. He doesn’t require any of the family to call him she or ask for special treatment. We just all know and have sympathy that this is how he feels about himself. He doesn’t think he is an actual biological woman, he gets on with his life and he causes no issues at all.

But I came across a younger transwoman in an art gallery recently, it was obvious that he was a man - not sure if it was his height or deep voice or just the way he carried himself but from the very first moment, I knew he was a man and a man about whom immediately I felt scared. He was loud, intimidating and taking up a lot of space. I immediately and instinctively thought I need to avoid this person, not attract his attention by accidentally catching his eye etc. Just like I would do in the presence of an aggressive man who was looking for trouble. I quickly slipped away and went to another room in the art gallery & kept an eye out for him to avoid him.

So I think it very much depends on what kind of the man the transwoman is. A scary and agressive man - whether they are wearing trousers or a dress - I will always instinctively know to avoid them for my own safety as a woman.

Nope when I see a transwomen im automatically on tightened alert as I know that statistically they are more dangerous than the average man

Th

Heightened not tightened

'I'll notice transwomen and recognise that they are trans, but I don't have the same socially-conditioned flight response.
Does anyone else experience this?'

After the last 10 years?...I have the same response.

If anything I have a stronger reaction to trans-identified men because I know they are more likely to be paraphilic and sexually violent than your average man is.

That's not true. Cis gendered males are statistically more dangerous and even more so if you're related to them. By all means have your opinions but don't tell lies.

I do wonder how many of these threads you lot can keep creating. It's seemingly numerous and endless in relation to an issue that effects a very small number of people.

I generally wouldn't cross a road if there was a dodgy looking person because I have found that sparks them off too much.

I f