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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

The Bluestocking Women's Pub, in which Gosie returns to the trail

903 replies

Magpiecomplex · 27/07/2026 20:46

Next thread!

OP posts:
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SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 02/08/2026 13:05

Ohhh heavens, @PastaAllaNorma - that sounds terrifying and painful - sending you gentle hugs.

MarieDeGournay · 02/08/2026 13:52

Oh Pasta, that's awful! I'm so sorry you are going through this, and that there doesn't seem to be much help from where we usually turn for helpFlowers

I hesitate to say 'Have you tried...? when you've probably tried everything under the sun but... blocking the pain somehow?
I had a little TENS machine when I was in a lot of pain from a trapped nerve, and when I found the right site for it, which took a it of experimentation, it helped. Maybe even feeling that I was doing something was therapeutic!

Please feel free to totally ignore this suggestion, I know that sometimes it can be overhwelming when you're really really not well and well-meaning people bombard you with 'Have you tried?'

Concentrate 100% on taking care of yourself todaySmile

JanesLittleGirl · 02/08/2026 14:23

Oh Pasta you poor thing. I don't have any helpful advice but I am sending gentle hugs.

DeanElderberry · 02/08/2026 14:32

@PastaAllaNorma, every sympathy, that sounds really tough.

have some flowers and a support camel

🌺🐪

EdithStourton · 02/08/2026 15:05

Damson, I love James Rebanks's writing, but I've not read that one yet. I've not yet read anything by his wife, but wifely input varies from farm to farm, at least in arable country. A friend of mine has been known to clamber into the combine cab to accost her husband with paperwork, but another one has bugger all to do with the farm and had her own serious career until she retired.

My latest big history book read was a massive but very readable tome about Lady Margaret Beaufort by Lauren Johnson. I read a review of Philippa Gregory's offering by the college archivist at St John's, Cambridge, who is familiar with Lady M's letters etc etc, and she absolutely slated it.

One of the best history-related books I have ever read was Super-Infinite, Katherine Rundell's biography of John Donne. Absolutely brilliant.

EdithStourton · 02/08/2026 15:07

@PastaAllaNorma that sounds completely horrible. No useful advice, just much sympathy and Flowers Flowers

MyrtleLion · 02/08/2026 16:08

I'll be posting the next chapter before 5pm.

DauntlessDamson · 02/08/2026 16:14

<dashes off to make tea and scones>

MarieDeGournay · 02/08/2026 16:36

One of the best history-related books I have ever read was Super-Infinite, Katherine Rundell's biography of John Donne. Absolutely brilliant.
Oooh I love John Donne, I must get that biography, thank you Edith!

I know he started out far removed from how he ended up, as Dean of St Paul's.

It reminds me of Brendan Behan's poem about Oscar Wilde, who also did a 180 - he died not just in poverty and in Paris, but also in the arms of the Catholic Church, a life of 'sin' followed by a deathbed conversion:

Dá aoibhne bealach an pheaca
Is mairg bás gan bheannacht
Mo ghraidhin thú a Oscair,
Bhí sé agat gach bealach.

Sweet is the way of the sinner,
Sad, death without God's praise.
My life on you, Oscar boy,
Yourself had it both ways.

Ditto Donne, but he didn't leave it till the last minute to make his peace with The LordSmile

Speaking of books - thanks are due too to Fuzzy who introduced me to RLStevenson's verses for children, and I got a 2nd hand copy off the internet [World of Books] which has beautiful illustrations by Jessie Wilcox Smith

MyrtleLion · 02/08/2026 16:49

Chapter 7 - Availability

In which the correspondence continues…

Gosie left Christmas Stars’ farmhouse in the morning, notebook restocked, and pointed the car south rather than straight back to the Bluestocking.

Peterborough was on the way, more or less, if you were willing to take the phrase more or less rather further than it usually stretched, and there had been a cathedral there she had never quite crossed off the list properly, a chapter house lost to the Dissolution and rebuilt in a style the survey described, unhelpfully, as sympathetic Victorian.

Sympathetic Victorian turned out to mean thorough, well documented, and entirely free of anything resembling a circle crossed by three diagonal lines. Gosie spent two hours confirming this, spoke to an archivist who was extremely proud of the roof bosses and wanted her to be proud of them too, and left with a good deal of new information about roof bosses and nothing whatsoever about Talmere.

She got back to the Bluestocking in the early evening, Christmas Stars having driven up separately to collect a delivery of her own and stayed on for the fuss, to find gerbils arranged around the noticeboard in a configuration that suggested an announcement rather than an ordinary evening.

“There’s a letter,” said Hedgehog, holding it up before Gosie had taken off her coat.

“For you,” she added, in case this had somehow been unclear.

“It’s got a postmark,” said Christmas Stars, with the particular satisfaction of someone whose own prediction was about to be proven right. “From the Fens.”

Gosie took the envelope. Her own name was written across the front in a hand so precise it looked printed, dark ink, perfectly weighted strokes, the kind of handwriting that suggested whoever held the pen had opinions about the pen.

She opened it carefully. Inside was a single sheet, and on it, in the same exact hand, a short paragraph stating that Miss Burnish was, at present, too occupied for an appointment, but that she had been most taken with the notepaper, and appreciated the effort of writing.

“That’s not a no,” said Hedgehog, reading over her shoulder before Gosie had properly finished the first read herself.

“It’s not a yes either,” said Gosie.

“It’s a maybe,” said Christmas Stars, with the confidence of someone who had decided this was good news and did not intend to be talked out of it.

Gosie folded the letter and put it in her pocket. She had a name confirmed and a compliment about stationery. She did not have a meeting, a date, or anything resembling an angle, and the silence since the workshop had begun to feel less like patience and more like a fact she was going to have to live with.

It was sitting with that particular flavour of frustration, the letter refolded twice, then a third time, that she remembered the other name.

Brennard and Vye. It had been in the Durham file since the very first afternoon with Judith, a name she had written down, underlined once out of habit, and never once followed up, because Fenhurst and Rhys had seemed the obvious thread to pull and there had been no reason at the time to pull two threads at once. There was, she thought, no reason not to now.

Brennard and Vye turned out to be considerably easier to find than their counterpart, a converted mill on the edge of a market town with a sign by the road and a car park with actual markings on it, as though the workshop expected to be visited and had planned accordingly.

The door was answered before Gosie had properly finished walking up to it, by a goldfinch in overalls dusted along one sleeve with something that caught the light like ground glass.

“You’ll be about the enquiry,” said Gemma Glasswing before Gosie had said anything at all, leading her through a workshop that smelled of hot metal and something faintly resinous, glass in every colour imaginable stacked in racks along one wall. “Good you’ve come. We’ve got the availability, whenever you need it.”

Gosie, who had not yet said what she was there for, took a moment to catch up. “Availability?”

“For new work. Isn’t that what this is?” Gemma set down the piece of glass she’d been carrying, unbothered, already halfway into an explanation she’d evidently given more than once recently. “We’ve all had calls, workshop after workshop, everyone asking the same thing, could we take something on, how quickly. Strange, after this long. We had years of it, mind, steady as anything, right through the pandemic when everyone else was living off furlough or patching roofs. Then nothing, dead quiet. Assumed the money had dried up, or whoever it was had simply finished.”

“Had they?”

“Seemed that way. Norwich Cathedral was the last new commission, best part of two years ago now. These things take time, restoration work, and that one only finished and delivered a few months back. Nothing fresh started since. Not until now.”

Gemma turned the glass over in her hands without really looking at it, the way people handle something too familiar to need watching. “And now suddenly it’s started again. Nothing confirmed yet, as far as I know. Just the asking.”

Gosie took out her notebook, and did not correct the assumption Gemma had made about why she’d come. “Durham,” she said instead. “The chapter house windows, 2021. That was part of the steady work?”

“That was ours, yes. Ripon too, around the same time.” Gemma said it plainly, the way she’d said everything else, a fact rather than a confidence.

Gosie wrote it down exactly as it had been said, and found that the useful thing about the afternoon was not Durham or Ripon at all. It was the shape of the whole thing, steady through years when nobody else was, then silence, and now, quietly, beginning again. Somewhere in that silence, something had been finished. Somewhere in its ending, something had apparently gone wrong.

https://myrtlelion.substack.com/p/7-availability

The Bluestocking Women's Pub, in which Gosie returns to the trail
Magpiecomplex · 02/08/2026 16:52

@PastaAllaNorma sending sympathy camels to you 🐪🐫
I was all set to sympathise with the appalling period symptoms, having spent all day feeling sick and with cramps starting myself now, but that's a whole other thing you've got going on. Having had 2 C-sections myself, may I say Owwww...

OP posts:
ShinyBlueTractor · 02/08/2026 16:57

PastaAllaNorma · 02/08/2026 12:08

What a lovely photo of Harriet.

Unfortunately I'm in a bit of a bad way. It wasn't appalling period cramps in the end, it was an incarcerated hernia. Basically my caesarian scar (x3) opened up 15 years ago, has been repaired twice (once in a scary emergency on a strangulated hernia that resulted in ICU).

It opened again 6 years ago and had been getting ever larger but the surgeon said it wasn't worth repairing unless I was under 35 BMI because of the risk of recurrence.

A section of intestine got trapped through the gap in my abdomenal wall which resulted in the pain and vomiting and everything. I feel like I've been kicked by a horse. My entire torso is in so much discomfort now the acute pain has stopped.

A gentle day for me.

Just catching up, how scary @PastaAllaNorma really sorry to hear it x

MarieDeGournay · 02/08/2026 17:03

Thank you Myrtle. A goldfinch in overalls! Love it!💛

“It’s a maybe,” said Christmas Stars, with the confidence of someone who had decided this was good news and did not intend to be talked out of it

I like that attitude, Stars, 'don't stop believing/hold on to that feeling'😃

MyrtleLion · 02/08/2026 17:06

MarieDeGournay · 02/08/2026 17:03

Thank you Myrtle. A goldfinch in overalls! Love it!💛

“It’s a maybe,” said Christmas Stars, with the confidence of someone who had decided this was good news and did not intend to be talked out of it

I like that attitude, Stars, 'don't stop believing/hold on to that feeling'😃

Oh I forgot to @ChristmasStars!

You're welcome. I love writing about Gosie.

Tomorrow's episode will be EARLY. Before 10am.

Because I am going to That London tomorrow for a meeting and then dinner with my friend. And I won't be back till quite late.

MarieDeGournay · 02/08/2026 17:12

Magpiecomplex · 02/08/2026 16:52

@PastaAllaNorma sending sympathy camels to you 🐪🐫
I was all set to sympathise with the appalling period symptoms, having spent all day feeling sick and with cramps starting myself now, but that's a whole other thing you've got going on. Having had 2 C-sections myself, may I say Owwww...

Rosie is dividing her time between you and Pasta , Magpie, but with the gentlest of gentle hugs which is probably all either of you feel like at the momentFlowers
[That's dear little Gubbins that she's hugging in this photoSmile]

The Bluestocking Women's Pub, in which Gosie returns to the trail
ErrolTheDragon · 02/08/2026 18:23

I’m so sorry Pasta. Period pains are horrible (sympathy also to Magpie) but at least they’re ‘natural’ rather than something scarily wrong iyswim.

AsWithGlad · 02/08/2026 18:59

Very sorry to read about your situation, Pasta.

AsWithGlad · 02/08/2026 19:07

Sorry this is late, I’m catching up.

Gosie and ChristmasStars were in Cambridge and I didn’t know? It’s quite close to where I live, had I known I could actually have seen them. From a respectful distance, of course, I would not like to have distracted them from their quest.

I’m very impressed that they got into Trinity. Their porters are reputed to be very fierce.

AngleofRepose · 02/08/2026 19:50

@PastaAllaNorma so sorry to hear about your ills. Sending virtual hugs a big bunch of ... chocolate your way! 🍩🍫🍪

AngleofRepose · 02/08/2026 19:58

Gosie is looking more and more perplexed in the pictures as her adventure goes on. I must admit, I don't have the foggiest where this is going, but I am enjoying it immensely!

Today, it's exactly six weeks since we have had rain (barring 15 minutes of a shower about a week ago, which really did nothing except get everyone's hopes up). It's worrying. I'm managing to keep my potted-on cuttings alive, and my potted trees (3x acers), but the only plants in the ground that I am watering are the recently-planted rambling roses that I grew from cuttings. Their roots aren't established enough yet, so must be watered.

Wherever my next home is, I'm planning a dry garden (lots of lavender, geraniums, and echinops for the bees) because I think this is how summers will be now for the rest of my life. And worse after I go, which is so worrying for the next generation.

FuzzyPuffling · 02/08/2026 20:25

Angle ,we have had the same rainfall ( or lack of) here. Maybe we live near each other!

But, I lost a cherry tree in the winter as it got waterlogged. A dry garden wouldn't survive that.

AngleofRepose · 02/08/2026 20:28

FuzzyPuffling · 02/08/2026 20:25

Angle ,we have had the same rainfall ( or lack of) here. Maybe we live near each other!

But, I lost a cherry tree in the winter as it got waterlogged. A dry garden wouldn't survive that.

True. Maybe if I plant in terraces or piles of rocks, so there's plenty of drainage? Or container only?

I'm in South Wales, not too far from Ogmore Vale.

FuzzyPuffling · 02/08/2026 20:31

My cherry tree was in a huge pot. 😞

I had a friend in college ( Cardiff) from Ogmore.

I'm in SW England, so the same weather systems. We're due some rain on Tuesdsy...fingers crossed.

AngleofRepose · 02/08/2026 20:37

FuzzyPuffling · 02/08/2026 20:31

My cherry tree was in a huge pot. 😞

I had a friend in college ( Cardiff) from Ogmore.

I'm in SW England, so the same weather systems. We're due some rain on Tuesdsy...fingers crossed.

Sorry about your cherry tree. 😑I have a begonia in a pot that I've had from a cutting, for nearly 35 years! I would be devastated if I lost her (so last year I did a few cuttings, and now she has a daughter 😀- the only cutting that survived).

FuzzyPuffling · 02/08/2026 20:41

Come on, Ms Begonia...I'm rooting for you.
See what I did there?

I have several.plants, and daughters of plants, that came from my late mum, a brilliant gardener. I'm very keen to keep them going.