I blame JKRowling

[RedToothBrush]

For shrinking the size of Monster Munch and shrinkflation generally.

Also the existence of belly button fluff

What do you blame her for?

I blame JKRowling for giving Angela, the number of her mate Jolyon, so she could have had some good tax advice...

I blame JKR for giving me the horrors over an event about 65 years ago which I had utterly forgotten, by setting the first chapters of her new book in Temple Ewell. Could she not have chosen Eythorne or Shepherdswell? But no, she chose a village with a boys' private school to which I and my younger sister were invited to a dance, and at which I wallflowered all evening except when a teacher very obviously alerted the head boy to my existence and he asked me to dance and I was bad it it because my school only taught things like the veleta and the St Bernard's Waltz, and he did a very complicated ballroom version of a waltz. And my sister and I shared a bedroom back home and she was bubbling over the lovely time she had and I was trying to cry silently into my pillow. I had forgotten all of that since, probably, the week after. Until now. When after reading the start in the small hours, I went to sleep to wake up with this going on! Memo to brain. You don't need to pull up every instance of a place name any time it occurs. Please. Let bygones be bygones.

My supposedly new-and-improved wifi router drops the internet at least once every 24 hours and has to be rebooted each time. This is clearly JKR's fault.

And JKR is also to blame for the abrupt end of summer, it's been raining and blowing a gale every day and I can't hang my laundry outside.

I entered our local lotto under a brilliant pseudonym , Björn Toulouse. But I still didn't win 😭. It is obviously karma because I read Troubled Blood and God is paying me back.

Oh Treaclewell, that's such a sad, and sadly relatable story - thank heavens our memories hide some of our worst teenage experiences down the back of the sofa of our conscious mind...

Then along comes that evil JKR, reaches down and picks something up -
'Oh look - Temple Ewell! That'll do nicely to torment Treaclewell bwah ha ha ha..''
Evil.

As of now, 'Temple Ewell' is the means by which you unloaded the story of an awful teenage experience, and by which somebody on MN understood completely, commiserated, and is sending your sobbing teenage self a virtual retrospective hug
Take that JKR! Some good has come from your evil plan!

I saw a box of Tunnocks Teacakes in the supermarket yesterday and they'd all been squashed. I bet she's going round stamping on them all, just to spite us.

I was told by my surgeon yesterday I can start taking off my walking boot at night. I did that and I couldn't sleep properly and when I got up this morning, my ankle was really sore.

Obviously JKR is to blame. She's probably laughing at me.

Thank you Marie. Seeing your post has made me think something could be done with village name and my posting identity which I did not notice while writing.

It is a brilliant pseudonym. Are you a fan of Ray Charles or Lemmy?

Try entering the lotto as Liv Toulon. Or Liv-Ann Letliv😁

Nothing is wrong for me at the moment but I'm sure JKR can arrange something soon.

She does get about a lot. Twitter is always highlighting her being bad but never actually says what she's actually done.

Bloody JKR has caused all this miserable weather. It’s her fault.

Good Lord, this woman's dreadful behaviour knows no bounds.

I HAVE LOST A SOCK. I now have a small black trainer sock bereft of its partner and I BET SHE'S BLOODY TAKEN IT.

Throw it away and, as soon as the bin men have been, the lost one will reappear.

That woman! I've hung onto odd socks for literally years. As soon as I give up...I don't know how she does it. She must have a spreadsheet.

I currently have no single socks in my house.

I fully expect I will awake to a pile of the entire universe's single socks next to my bed.

And of course we all know who will have arranged for that to happen.

We should circulate a list. My odd socks' pairs.must have gone somewhere, so perhaps.one of you has them.

If JKR isn't hoarding them all.

I'm pretty sure she's nicked the pack of fancy oatcakes I bought instead of Nairn's, as an experiment. I only ate one.

To be fair, it was horrible. But that's not the point.

Many years ago,long before I ever heard of JKR, I'd have teaspoons go missing. On occasion they would randomly reappear on the stairs. I never got to the bottom of it until now.

Clearly this was JKR practicing mischief before she was famous. Once she became a big name she must have got bored of messing with my teaspoons and moved on to being the sock thief for everyone else. I do apologise that she clearly got practice at mine first before becoming more ambitious in her ways. I'd have stopped her had I known how out of control this situation would become...

🤬

It makes no sense. Taking one sock and hanging onto it until its match is thrown away so it can also be nabbed. I can just about see the logic, you then have a pair. Returning the original sock though? It's like she just wants to cause mischief....💡😲

For me not being able to identify as a child and live a life free from responsibilities. Lost out on a lifetime of child benefit by not being able to self identity too.

I'm really upset that JKR has come on here and changed all the colours and made the screen look totally rubbish! What IS she playing at???

She's changed it for everyone? I thought she had just fiddled with the settings on my phone while I was out shopping. I don't know which is worse. 😠

@ScarlettSunsetI think it’s important to be fair, even when heinous crimes have taken place. Those of us of a certain age will know that Terry Wogan was responsible for the Teaspoons. Or was that the ones left at the bottom of the washing up bowl?

Of course, JFK could have taken over as the chief teaspoon tinkerer. I wouldn’t put anything past that woman.

I'm blaming Ms Rowling for it blowing a hoolie outside. 😡 I can hear it in the blocked up chimney and it's making my house shake. (I'm neither Scottish nor live in Scotland but love Scottish words. 😁)