After the Christmas Eve incident, Dr Upton wrote that they were "distraught."
"I feel attacked and cornered. I explained, this is the first time I’ve experienced anything like this in person."
Oh hello.
He was pre-conditioned.
Anecdote time.
When my brother was first transitioning he didn't want to tell me or my fiancé because he thought DH would be prejudiced.
It then became apparent that he was surrounded by a number of individuals who explained how badly they had been treated and then conditioned him to believe this to be what to expect. It was clear he'd been wound up into this state.
So it came out as overly defensive and actually aggressive because of HIS OWN prejudices. We literally didn't even KNOW never mind say a word! It was the first time paths had crossed and we hadn't opened our mouths and we're met with hostility.
His behaviour was intolerable and unacceptable. Even my mother was saying, to us, that he was way out of line, but also telling me I should put up with it because 'poor ickle hurt thing'. Her pandering to it and unwillingness to challenge him damaged our relationship because she expected me to play second fiddle and be a doormat.
And I said in no uncertain terms it was not acceptable behaviour and I wasn't going to put up with it, and that was nothing to do with identity and everything to do with being a twat. I said No.
It's exactly the same pattern.
Now this isn't the first time I've recounted this story on MN.
It's fascinating to see the same thing, potentially at the heart of this case.
I really really want this to unfold fully. Even more so now.