The Bluestocking is reopening

[ErrolTheDragon]

It's time we reopened the Bluestocking, I think.

This is the FWR pub, situated in the charming village of Badley Fuckitt near the Shady Pines rest home. It has a cannon (for reasons lost in the mists of time), goats in the paddock next to the beer garden and a menu including many soups and cakes. It's open all hours, serving breakfast and tea to all weary women, in addition to being the ideal location to metaphorically drown your sorrows.

Naice coffee ...

@CocoapuffPuff , would you kindly make a batch using this recipe for Paradise Slice another time? No need to wait for the pastry to chill as there isn’t any.

Dark chocolate goes on the bottom instead.

Wouldn't that be a kind of stodgy British Florentine?

(awaits ejection by bouncers from pub via window)

Wouldn't that be a kind of stodgy British Florentine?

You say that like it's a bad thing.

They'll be fighting over who gets to drive it.

Raspberry jam and glacé cherries.

Not this recipe but close.

https://scottishscran.com/paradise-slice/

Ooh that's different. I've bookmarked that, thanks!

No, no. It’s not flat. It’s at least 1” deep. Here’s a picture from the website.

It’s almost healthy when you think of all the fruit - sultanas and cherries. Ignore the sugar and butter: there’s something about the way it’s cut up in The Bluestocking that makes the calories fall out.

I think dark chocolate is supposed to be good for the heart, emotionally anyway.

If I go all-out, a sweater takes about 3 weeks - but it all depends on my energy levels, or lack thereof.

It strikes me that it's high time one of your menfolk learned to knit, @SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius

When I was growing up all our knitwear was designed and made by my grandfather.

My God, that's impressive. I've had the same cardy on the go for months. It is tricky, though. I keep stopping for a week to recover from half a day struggling with the pattern.

I can't believe you greedy bastards emptied the gravy bowser. I came back in for a healthy second lunch after a bracing dog walk, only to find one last sad Yorkie and No Gravy.

I used to knit, made myself lots of nice woolies. Then I started on one for DH, got about halfway through and lost enthusiasm.
Except he wasn't my DH then, he was my boyfriend....this was (bloody hell!) 40 years ago and the bag is still languishing in the bottom of my wardrobe. I can't quite bring myself to bin it.

A gravy bowser!

Is, is this Heaven?

There’s something often mentioned on the knitting site Ravelry called “The Boyfriend Curse.” It’s when you spend a significant level of time and money on knitting something for your boyfriend, usually a jumper, and soon after you give it to him you split up.

So it’s a good thing, @ErrolTheDragon , that you never finished that woolly for your then-boyfriend now DH.

I wish to swim in the gravy bowser.

Obviously I'm not going to as that would be all sorts of wrong.

But I want to so bad!

I have a similar languishing lace project, Errol.

I started making a lace handkerchief edging for my grandmother, but she died when I was about 2/3 of the way round, so I put it away 'for a bit' in, um, 1987. I've tried a few times to go back to it, but it's not a standard lace stitch - it was one of my own invention - and I can't remember how to do it. Attempts at retroengineering by undoing it mean it's now only about 1/2 a square.

You know that thing where people run/walk across a pool of custard, because custard made with cornflower is a non-Newtonian fluid.

Could you do that with gravy? Not Boily, who will no doubt sink deliberately.

With thick enough gravy, yes. Flour/cornflour can create a non-Newtonian fluid.

You'd need a good slicing¹ gravy, though.

¹ In this house gravy is classified as pouring, glazing or slicing. I disapprove of the pouring type.

Well, that's a couple of afternoons' outdoor entertainment sorted for the beer garden, no?

I prefer gravy that could be swum in so, if I make enough, I'll decant some off for Beetle and she can dabble about in that.

Can I bring my neighbour to join in? She's just been for afternoon tea and I reckon she'd love it here and fit right in.

Pouring gravy is acceptable for swimming purposes.

Well... it is my birthday! And yours! So I'll run across for you as well if you want! Just in case me sinking the first time was a fluke!

It's sentences like this that keep me coming back here you know!

The more the merrier.although I assume you mean the pub and not my bowl of gravy that I'll be practising the back stroke in.

I think if we switch off the agitator and keep drinking skimming off the top we'll eventually have gravy that's thick enough to walk on. So long as we're sharp about it. If we dawdle we'll sink which would be awesome.

....

Terrible. I mean it would be terrible.

Talking of awesome though. Anyone want to drag the bowser to the bottom of the zip wire?