They / them at work

[pootlefump]

I've just written a long post and it's disappeared so in brief - how do you deal with staff who are they/them at work? I will really struggle to call a very obvious biological male 'they'. I also can't loose my job and do want to be respectful but also can't change my view on this nonsense !

I agree that women need single-sex spaces. I'm grateful to have them.

Totally agree @fedupandstuck - no need to pander to the deluded. Grey rock all the way.

I was reading the thread about pronouns at work out of interest. No one has trouble with mine (she/her). But no one at work has ever known me as anything but female. I can see how they/them seems unnatural, but you just have to get used to it. Soon it'll be second nature!

Anyway, I saw some misunderstandings of trans women's bodies, especially their genitals, and thought it might be helpful to correct some of them. So I signed up.

Stuck in your body? I know how that feels. Becoming a woman set me free. I'm sorry you have to feel like that.

How am I deluded?

Yes, quite. It's good practice and useful to recognise it for what it is and not be drawn.

I feel grateful that I work in an area that has not been affected by this ideology, and for a company that is extremely unlikely to decide to take it on.

Recent posts are discussing trans women's genitals. Well, insulting them would be more accurate. But I think it's ignorance rather than hate.

Understanding is key. I hope my input can help with that.

I know this was posted at the start of the thread, but I think it's worth posting again at this point:

https://fairplayforwomen.com/pronouns/

just when I thought this thread didn’t have anymore to give 🤪🤪

In maternity nursing, front hole and bonus hole are not filthy or any of the other things that people have said. Some trans men or the non-binary feel deeply uncomfortable with the usual terms. In the NHS, we feel that patients are allowed agency over their bodies in every way and that it's their individual choice what to call them. Those terms do not replace vagina.

Any man who claims he's a woman and states he has a vagina clearly has no idea what a vagina is. He does not have and cannot ever have female biology.

Any man who claims to be a woman and uses the women's toilets is deliberately and knowingly violating women's boundaries to validate a fantasy and force participation. A very male behaviour. Of course no woman is going to challenge this man in the loos. Obviously a man who thinks he's a woman doesnt have the lived experience of being a woman and therefore can't assess the risks challenging a man who overstep social norms poses to our sex.

How very sad to read a man can't accept being a feminine gay man. What has happened to gay acceptance?

How unlikely is the passing privilege claimed here. We all know. Unless this person has a strangely stunted skeleton, unusually tiny hands, no Adams apple, smaller feet than the average man and let's not forget the obvious gait and voice.

I won't say what I think about this person's choice of profession but I find it notable.

Indeed. I hope the OP has had sufficient support despite the lengthy derails.

Indeed

@HeartofSaturdayNight

"I won't say what I think about this person's choice of profession but I find it notable."

What does that mean? I support vulnerable birthing parents and I'm very good at it! I get a lot of cards of gratitude from parents who have benefited from my care.

Can I just point out that Lucy Letby was born female!

I don't claim to be a woman. I am a woman. I would have a massive fright if I saw a man in the loos.

Maaaate

Me?

Oh - and I'm not gay and never have been! Neither is my husband, who I met on a straight dating website. He loves me for me, not for what sex I was wrongly assigned at birth or what bits I have or don't have. I've always been a woman waiting to claw my way out of the ill-fitting shell I was born in.

Oh I'd forgotten about that idiotic attempt at a policy from Sadie Khan! Maaate indeed!

Oh god im so bored of the endless attention seeking

I mean is there nowhere where a man won’t barge in to share their special thinky thoughts with us like we haven’t heard their nonsense a thousand times before

And, fyi, I have been sexually harrassed on the street when I look good, I have been talked down to at work, and I have also been folowed at night.= by a biological male who was significantly taller and stronger than me.

I'm not very tall and the hormones have taken my muscle away, especially as I don't work out.

Anyway, Kate Winslet has massive feet!

Whoops, Sadiq Khan, not Sadie Khan! Blasted autocarrot.

🙄🙄🙄🙄

ODFOD

I agree. Men always talk over us.

Anyone for cake?

What does that mean? I'm older than most of you youngsters, probably.