Dating as a TERF

[TERFisTHEnewTREND]

I'm a 34 year old female. I'm currently dating via Tinder.

When the gender issue has come up and I've mentioned that I'm a TERF, a lot of men have disengaged from me. I once went on three dates with a man, we got on great, and then when I mentioned my views on gender ideology, he ghosted me after!

Do you mention your stance up front or do you wait? I don't want to date anyone who thinks humans can change sex, is it worth stating this on my profile?

Any help/ advice/ insights appreciated.

I'm not sure the doing the dishes part is the part they are identifying with.

According to a poll done 3% of straight men say they would, and that's likely to grow given how relatively new this is in mainstream society.

Yeah, they're not actually straight men.

And there's nothing wrong with that. Be bisexual. Be anything you want to be.

Why have we got people frantically trying to redefine straight to mean bisexual as if this is something to aspire to?

This entire movement is based on absolute disrespect for others and trying to coerce them into being what the movement wants. In this moment.

Fuck off and develop some fucking social skills for fucks sake.

I slightly disagree. There's an element to it. There was a TW on Twitter a few years ago who used to make a big production out of doing dishes. They'd post photos of themselves in big pink gloves and this fifties style dress at sink filled with bubbles while making comments about how lovely it was to be a homemaker.
Whether they actually did the dishes or just had the little photo shoot, I don't know but there was a huge performance element to it

Aye, there's nothing that hasn't been appropriated as a fetish by some bloke, somewhere.

Yes. Important to separate performative fetish from real, actual shitwork.

If you want to know what a woman is, look for the ones TRAs/MRAs/incels see as the free labour.

There was also that one who used to write in the Telegraph & talked about wanting to be a homemaker in a pinny, or something like that.

The thing is I bet the only women who do the washing up like that are in adverts or instagram selling something . Normal life we just get on with or take it in turns

Thomas. And that one marveled at the feelings of breasts moving as they walked. It was clear just that was a sexual thing for them.

You down with A.G.P.? (Yeah, you know me)

'‘I had quite nice boy legs, but they were hairy and let me tell you, being zapped 4,000 times in one session is a whole new world of pain. There is a lot of talk about the agony of childbirth, but you don’t get an epidural when you have your legs lasered.’'

'It is Diana’s belief that ‘trannies’ (a description of herself that she uses a lot) can bring something extra to womanhood. ‘I use the immigration analogy because in the same way that immigrants bring to their host nation things from their own culture – food, music, whatever – I think I can bring – or we can bring – something new and interesting to the female experience.'

'.... I would make somebody a really good wife. I love creating a beautiful home, nothing makes me happier – except possibly cooking a lovely meal or going shopping. I have worked hard all these years, I have earned my way for long enough, so yes, put a pinny round my neck and let me be a homemaker, please!'

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/health-fitness/body/call-diana-columnist-david-thomas-reveals-new-life-look/

Let’s not forget that Thomas wrote a Men’s Rights text before finding their inner woman. Pure misogynist from early on. The hatred this male individual has for women and girls is very deep.

'‘I had quite nice boy legs, but they were hairy and let me tell you, being zapped 4,000 times in one session is a whole new world of pain. There is a lot of talk about the agony of childbirth, but you don’t get an epidural when you have your legs lasered.’'

Tell me you're not a woman without telling me you're not a woman.

A pinny 😱😱😱
If I wasn't already married I would /love/ to marry a man who wanted to be a homemaker. Not one who thinks that this requires the adopting of 1950s stereotypes and makes him a woman though.

'It is Diana’s belief that ‘trannies’ (a description of herself that she uses a lot) can bring something extra to womanhood. ‘I use the immigration analogy because in the same way that immigrants bring to their host nation things from their own culture – food, music, whatever – I think I can bring – or we can bring – something new and interesting to the female experience.'

No, Diana, womanhood is already complete without your contribution, thanks.

How man-centric to believe that what womanhood needs is a man to show women how to woman properly.

I think I can bring.....something new and interesting to the female experience

The misogyny and the fucking arrogance!

NO mate, you have NOTHING to offer the female experience because YOU ARE NOT FEMALE.

As so often, reading this shit: it's funny, but it's not really. Some weird blend of arrogance and stupidity.

And someone will be along any minute to remind that a man can be as rude and offensive as he likes but the woman must not retaliate by pulling away his fig leaf and naming the facts. Because mean to poor man. Who should just be allowed to crack on talking his utter offensive bollocks to women who suck it up nicely.

'.... I would make somebody a really good wife. I love creating a beautiful home, nothing makes me happier – except possibly cooking a lovely meal or going shopping. I have worked hard all these years, I have earned my way for long enough, so yes, put a pinny round my neck and let me be a homemaker, please!'

What was stopping David doing any of that before now? Many women across the land would be very grateful if their male partners did a bit more around the house. Who knew it was just a case of calling them by a female name and giving them a pinny to wear?!

Don't be silly, doing housework is a woman thing, duh.

I have it in my profile and it makes no difference. They don't read the profile they just look at your pictures half the time

🤮

Then maybe the answer is an Adult Human Female T-shirt.

"No-one can seriously think these comments are acceptable or tolerant. They are marginalising or insulting a group of people."

I mean, what the actual fuck. Do you actually understand you are here lecturing women who are pointing out that YOU have redefined them in your wedging open the word 'woman' to mean any person of either sex who just feels like they are a woman?

Do you actually understand how hypocritical all your posts so far have been on different layers?

Your lack of self awareness is really very clear to anyone reading your contributions to this thread.

According to a poll done 3% of straight men say they would, and that's likely to grow given how relatively new this is in mainstream society.

Something on Twitter today led me to remember what this poster said about 3% straight men. I saw there is actually a classification for men who have a sexual interest in males with a trans identity. Gynandromorphophilia,

Who are gynandromorphophilic men? Characterizing men with sexual interest in transgender women

KJ Hsu, AM Rosenthal, DI Miller, JM Bailey
26 October 2015

Abstract
Background: Gynandromorphophilia (GAMP) is sexual interest in gynandromorphs (GAMs; colloquially, shemales). GAMs possess a combination of male and female physical characteristics. Thus, GAMP presents a challenge to conventional understandings of sexual orientation as sexual attraction to the male v. female form. Speculation about GAMP men has included the ideas that they are homosexual, heterosexual, or especially, bisexual.
Method: We compared genital and subjective sexual arousal patterns of GAMP men with those of heterosexual and homosexual men. We also compared these groups on their self-ratings of sexual orientation and sexual interests.
Results: GAMP men had arousal patterns similar to those of heterosexual men and different from those of homosexual men. However, compared to heterosexual men, GAMP men were relatively more aroused by GAM erotic stimuli than by female erotic stimuli. GAMP men also scored higher than both heterosexual and homosexual men on a measure of autogynephilia.
Conclusions: Results provide clear evidence that GAMP men are not homosexual. They also indicate that GAMP men are especially likely to eroticize the idea of being a woman.

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26498424/

Just for those who didn't catch that last line and the last line on the Results section:

"GAMP men also scored higher than both heterosexual and homosexual men on a measure of autogynephilia."
and

"They also indicate that GAMP men are especially likely to eroticize the idea of being a woman."

Well, well, well. You know what they say about paraphilias.

Now, getting back to that 3%. Is this the study?

https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0265407518779139?journalCode=spra

And according to Psychology Today, it is less than 3%.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/sex-sexuality-and-romance/202104/will-straight-men-and-women-date-trans-person

And it was :”Extremely few—less than 3 percent—of straight men and women would consider dating a trans individual, regardless of whether that person matched their straight sexual orientation (a transman born female for straight men; a transwoman born male for straight women) or their gender preference (a transwoman for straight men; a transman for straight women).”

So, unless anyone has access to this study and can tell us exactly the breakdown, I can only assume that this is rather more complicated than : According to a poll done 3% of straight men say they would, and that's likely to grow given how relatively new this is in mainstream society.

I would suggest that those 3 % of straight people would also include both male and female people who would consider sleeping with trans people who are the opposite sex. ie. They ARE still heterosexual because it could be that those male people responding are stating they would have sex with a female trans person.

And there will always be those who declared they are straight but will be bisexual, so that 3% is looking more and more false than ever and it looks like a very oversimplified and superficial reading of what the results seem to be.

Happy to be corrected if anyone has access to the study. But, gosh..... the truth is in that finer detail that seems to be not graspable by some.