My feed

to access all these features

Feminism: Sex & gender discussions

All the bad things JKR has done. A history.

532 replies

WandaWomblesaurus73 · 05/01/2022 21:08

I think this is a good time to go over all the bad things JKR has done (as started on the did he or didn't he Jon Stewart thread)

Earlier, I went into the bathroom and I noticed JK Rowling had moved the cat litter tray so I stood in a little bit of cat poop.

OP posts:
WandaWomblesaurus73 · 05/01/2022 21:22

I'm stuck here looking at a photograph of Sirius Black with long glossy hair wearing nothing but a fur coat and some trousers.
I'm disgusted at his tattooed chest and angled jaw.

It's her fault.

OP posts:
Theeyeballsinthesky · 05/01/2022 21:22

She squeezes the toothpaste from the middle AND she never puts the lid on so you get horrid dry bits

DryHeave · 05/01/2022 21:23

JKR personally bewitched my cat to run over my face at 3am.

FortunaMajor · 05/01/2022 21:25


It was JK Rowling who told your Mum Mr Frosty was rubbish and that's why you didn't get one for Christmas.

She's always truthful😅,

Grin truth right there!
ChloeCrocodile · 05/01/2022 21:28

She punctured my tyre last night, deliberately waiting until it was raining so I got soaked changing it.

yourhairiswinterfire · 05/01/2022 21:30

JKR leaves toast crumbs in my butter. DP swears it's not him, so the only other person it could be is her.

I'm pretty sure she also broke my electric whisk and kept shtum about it, so when I came to whip my cream for my first ever banoffee pie, I couldn't. Ruined dessert. Witch.

MummBRaaarrrTheEverLeaking · 05/01/2022 21:30


Everyone that doesn't indicate to come off the roundabout at the exit before you is JKR.


JKR turned me into a newt!

I got better.

She also caused my earlier knee twinge. Not the exercise class I did last night, no siree, it was all JKR.
Mumoftwoinprimary · 05/01/2022 21:30

I don’t know why you are wobbling about with these minor crimes!

She killed Sirius Black!
And Colin Creevy!
And Dumbledore!
And lots and lots of other people.

She is a serial killer!

NewtScamandersNaughtyNiffler · 05/01/2022 21:32

In honor of this thread I've reverted to an old name.

She killed Dobby. And Hedwig. And Fred. And so so many others.

She really is the worst.

sharksarecool · 05/01/2022 21:33

JK Rowling always outbids you on Ebay in the final seconds.

Truthlikeness · 05/01/2022 21:34

I'm reliably informed she played a key role in the Permian-Triassic extinction event, which killed off 96% of all species on earth.

Gumbomambo · 05/01/2022 21:35

JKR loosened the third step from the top, just enough to creak at 3 am when the cat goes over it, so my son thinks it’s ghosts and has to get in bed with us. I believe she also taught him to crawl over the bed to my side on his sharpened elbows but that bits just conjecture.

Chewbecca · 05/01/2022 21:36

Hufflepuffs are the main contributor to climate change.

HaroldMeeker · 05/01/2022 21:38

JKR just scared my cat by farting so loudly, he woke up.

Cailleach1 · 05/01/2022 21:38

She is directly responsible for writing books which lured my offspring into become a voracious reader. Some suspect magic right there.

theNumbersStation · 05/01/2022 21:40

I know someone is putting empty milk bottles and orange juice cartons back in the fridge.

Who does that?

I’ll tell you who.

Stand up Joanne…

Artichokeleaves · 05/01/2022 21:42

JKR just set off my car alarm. Definitely her zooming about outside, probably on a broom again, she's always at it. No consideration. If it's not that she's turning herself into a cat and leaving muddy footprints all over my bonnet.

ladymalfoy · 05/01/2022 21:43

JKR punched two of my Tunocks Teacakes whilst they were still in the box.
I had to eat them first.

MissSteak · 05/01/2022 21:44

JKR was on the grassy knoll.

NitroNine · 05/01/2022 21:45

• JKR trains black cats to lie concealed on dark stairs
• JKR makes toast fall buttered side down
• JKR makes pencil leads snap & refuse to sharpen properly

  • JKR sneaks (dirty) tissues into your trouser pockets between you checking they’re empty & you putting them in the washing machine
    • JKR casts “muffliato” so you do not hear your cat(s) coughing up hairballs AND hides your slippers, causing you to tread barefoot in the mess of bile & fur Envy Not. Envy.
    • JKR is responsible for all the “May Contain Traces Of” & associated “if you have an allergy just don’t eat it” shenanigans; ditto the nonsense cop-out that is “plant-based” foods which are not actually suitable for vegans nor for people allergic to
    dairy &/or eggs.
    • JKR moves; steals; AND swaps bookmarks. Her wickedness knows no bounds.
    • JKR makes bananas go from green to brown with no pause at “edible”.
    • JKR scatters Lego under the feet of anyone she can reach.
    • JKR makes the colours run when you do laundry…
ladymalfoy · 05/01/2022 21:49

@NitroNine love your Wicked list . It's Ace!
Can I add
She's responsible for 'sharing bags' AND 'peel to re-seal' to save the same.
I don't want to share or re-seal my Dinky Deckers

Giggorata · 05/01/2022 21:50

JKR mixes up the bin days, so I out the wrong colour bin out, which then gets ignored.

She caused the word mushrooms to be erased from the shopping list I wrote for DH, so there are none.

She snapped the pull cord in the loo, as well.

RestingPandaFace · 05/01/2022 21:54

JKR made it rain when I was out for a run earlier.

Spitspotsput · 05/01/2022 22:00

The power of this woman!

vivariumvivariumsvivaria · 05/01/2022 22:01

She did not curl up and die like I expected her to after I repeatedly assaulted and dehumanised her - until she was alone and destitute with our kid.

She then had the fucking audacity to personify that revenge is to live well.

Fucking bitch.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.