Breastfeeding support group wants to allow males

[user643899]

I am in a Facebook group for breastfeeding support.

There's a new comment from admin asking if we'd be comfortable with males joining the group, then a subsequent poll.

I commented on said poll, "I am a feminist. Call me a terf. Biologically you are male or female. Feel free to identify as what you wish but you cannot change your sex. This group is for breastfeeding. Only females can breastfeed."

I was called a bigot. One comment read, "you aren't a feminist. Feminists want equality for all genders." I responded,"Equality for both sexes, yes. Female is a sex. Feminism derives from the word, female."

Now my original comment has been deleted. I daren't comment again through fear of removal.

I'm upset. This is the group I used when I had thrush. I posted pictures of the thrush on my boob. I can't be comfortable in a group made for my sex.

Well, of course, you just send it back with the receipt and a little note explaining you requested the non-transphobic variety.

My fiancé came with me to my local bf group once (a few years ago). He was only there for a mere ten mins and learned so much about breastfeeding in that time. He was able to have questions answered face to face by a professional and then as a result was able to support me with breastfeeding at home. He was a great support to me and I honestly don't think I would've survived cluster feeding without him!

I think having men present for very limited amounts of time for good reasons AFTER it is cleared by the group is OK. However, other than these kinds of special situations, men should not be in these groups.

Men do tend to take over though don’t they? At my pre-natal classes it was pretty much the dads asking questions and doing the talking. And me...

Slight detail but to Engineer's point, I remembered a scene from Handmaid's tale when Serena tries to breastfeed June's baby. The baby girl, who was already unsettled, screams more and Serena says sorry. She knows it was an action she took for herself and not the baby.

It's not right for LLL to be putting the needs of the child anywhere other than 1st place. The mother should be in 2nd place. A man with a fetish, whether he is the father or not, whether he is the partner or not, shouldn't even feature on the list.

By all means have the men in a separate group, they can identify and wear what they want, the men who are there for genuine reasons and want to be helpful will be the majority and any one who has other motivations will stand out a mile.

@Therarestone

How dare a man want to find more information so he can be supportive of his partner breastfeeding their child. HOW DARE HE.

I managed to find the information to be supportive without joining a breastfeeding support group. Wife/GF can share what she's learned in the group afterwards if he wants to know more, although I imagine that would be largely irrelevant to what he needs to know.

@MRC20

Where are all these places where men have babies comfort suckling on their nipples? I have never heard of this happening anywhere. If my husband suggested he have our babies comfort suckle his nipples I'd have his bloody hard drive checked and he'd be out the door.

I would love to know which cultures apparently do this.

Dd could sniff my milk from a mile away, I can't imagine her sucking on male chest with 0 milk. So bizarre.

The admin said breastfeeding and chest feeding are interchangeable but it is wrong to use breastfeeding in place of chest feeding. Then I got the whole "sexual abuse victims don't like to acknowledge their breasts." 🙄

What a crazy world we live in.