"My 15 yr old trans son is going through menopause - and I'm so proud of him"

[bettybeans]

http://www.essentialkids.com.au/health/health-wellbeing/my-15yearold-transgender-son-is-going-through-menopause--and-im-so-proud-of-him-20200416-h1nfe0

Christ almighty. I have been trying very hard not to go in heavy on parents of trans kids who make decisions that I simply don't understand but this whole situation just brought out absolute fury. The way she speaks about this process just enrages and saddens me in a way I can't adequately articulate. It's quite simply terrifying. I feel like I'm reading about a baptism or something.

This kid didn't stand a chance and it's absolutely heartbreaking.

Me neither Whatno

TinselAngel Its a weird website isn't it? Comes across as very superficial.

Okay so I'm always flitting between sides of this subject but this article has confused me, I can't see where all your rage is coming from?
There's no scientific proof it causes a drop in IQ as one pp said. The boy will have a sex life if he wants one, so I don't know why that's a concern for you all.

All I see is a parent listening to their child and understanding that some people feel they were born in the wrong body and want to live their life as man/woman. I can't understand the fury about this, am I missing something major?

... The boy will have a sex life if he wants one...

If?

You've missed that a fifteen year old girl is being damaged for life.

Ffs.

@HorseRadishFemish some people choose not to have sex or are asexual, so yes, if

If my 15 year old dd told me she wanted to be sterilised, I would be kind and sympathetic but I would not help her do it. Even if it made her (at the time) unhappy as it would not be in her long term best interests and as a parent that's what I need to think of.

I can’t have been the only 15 year old for whom growing up was a complete disaster, full of unattainable expectations of what I had to become and fighting bad skin, horrible periods and fearful of failure.

My favourite song was the theme from MAS*H which I found comforting.
My parents were a bit rubbish but now I realise I could have done a lot worse.

@ThisIsMyStory1

To put it simply, around 80+ of children who feel wrong, if left alone will desist and go on to be perfectly happy in their bodies. Over half will be same sex attracted.

The path this mother has set her child on leaves them sterile, a sexual and with devastating health consequences. The child doesn’t have the cognitive capacity to consent.

Some of us think sterilising gay children is wrong

@testing987654321 I understand that a body is being permanently changed, of course I do. But if the child didn't get given this option and went on to self harm because they were disassociated with the body they were in wouldn't that be more awful? Trans teens and children who have parents who tell them to wait till they're older often experience extreme depression.

I don't know, I don't think I like the 'wait till you're older' argument. I have OCD that manifests as very intrusive thoughts and obsessive thinking. I was tortured over my teen years because my parents just told me these feelings were down to hormones and puberty. I think all teens have the right to be listened to by a medical profession, the parent hasn't gone and bought this medicine on the black market, a doctor has assessed and made the decision to prescribe.

"The boy" won't have the chance to develop sexually. But isn't it convenient that now we can just call stunted and medically blocked sexuality "ace" instead of thinking what "the boy" might be missing.

@HermioneWeasley I'm sorry, but how do you know the child is gay? It doesn't mention anywhere in the article that he's attracted to females?

@anonymousLangFan but ace people truly do exist? It's not a connivence created for trans teenagers, it's a real thing

@ThisIsMyStory1 the child will be infertile. The mother has not given consideration to the pain this will be likely to cause. The child will probably not have a satisfying sex life, ditto the mother hasn't given consideration to this. The child's vagina will atrophy and be prone to infections, ditto the mother hasn't given consideration to this. The problems with the child's vagina will eventually lead to a hsyterectomy and this will lead to more problems, ditto the mother hasn't given consideration to this. This mother has not protected her child and it is painful - and enraging - to read her mindless, shallow flippant disregard for her child's wellbeing

am I missing something major?

A child has been put down a course of drug dependancy for the rest of their life and gone through menopause at 15?

What is the long term effect of menopause at such a young age?

What is the long term effect of these drugs?

While I agree there are people with a genuine gender disphoria who can only come to terms with their discomfort through surgery and medication, but many young people when allowed to grow and understand themselves come to a different conclusion. The child needs time to grow and really understand who they are before making such a drastic choice.

All I see is a parent listening to their child and understanding that some people feel they were born in the wrong body and want to live their life as man/woman. I can't understand the fury about this, am I missing something major

If your child said they really really wanted to go sky dining without a parachute would you feel that you were being a good parent if you made this happen?

This mother is doing the equivalent to her child.

As a parent you have to say no to your child no matter how much upset it will cause.

This mother couldn’t be bothered to do any research on what is being injected into her child’s body let alone tell her child that being a bit off with the world and periods and how her body was changing was completely normal.

Ultimately this mother doesn’t want to raise a “normal child” she wants her child to be special

As for the “towering over her” bit

My Dd towers over me. 6ft 5in in stilettos. You don’t have to be male to tower over your mother

@IchbineinBerlinner but the doctor will have considered all of those occurrences won't they? That's I think what confuses me, anger at the mother for supporting her child just seems wrong?
The doctor will have gone through a rigorous process to decide if the child is suitable for treatment, it's not an easy thing to get prescribed. Or is there evidence that doctors prescribing this treatment are not doing their jobs properly?

I'm genuinely not trying to goad, I'm trying to understand

I get the feeling that having a 'trans' child offers some parents a 'get-out' from feelings that they may be implicated in their child's distress.

It's normal as a parent to feel endlessly guilty and responsible if a child is suffering mental health issues........but if your child is suffering because they're 'trans' - it cannot have anything to do with you; your circumstances; your marriage etc

The teenager has a right to mental health support obviously. But one which will help her develop into a healthy adult, not extreme and damaging operations/medication.

Doctors are human too and do get stuff wrong, think of lobotomies, seemed like a good idea to some at the time. Not so much now.

ThisIsMyStory1 "The boy will have a sex life if he wants one" Did you sleep through sex education/biology?

I thought it was becoming increasingly clear that indulging children like this instead of supporting them to live with uncomfortable feelings is absolutely the most damaging thing we can do, and says far more about parental insecurity than anything about the child. This article here explains it quite nicely:
www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2020/05/childhood-in-an-anxious-age/609079/

By doing everything we can to avoid their discomfort, from food issues to sexuality, we’re just screwing them up.

This mother doesn't see the contradiction between transing a female child and running a business which is supposed to make women feel better about themselves

It strikes me as that rather vacuous, 'me too' type of feminism....which embraces all of the feminine stereotypes and cliches.

The mother should be prosecuted. This is a child protection issue. And the thing that is most obvious, is despite that child's body being destroyed, they still look like the sex they were born as. So very very sad. I hope that child finds peace.

How will the child have a sex life?

ThisIsMyStory1

From my understanding from those that de transition there doesn’t seem to be any thought about long term effects.

But if the child didn't get given this option and went on to self harm

As opposed to what.

Getting this treatment that will bring on osteoporosis, heart disease and possibly shorten their life. Not to mention cutting breasts off or slicing a penis if they are a boy.
Just to save them from maybe self harming