I Believe Her

[Brittany2019]

This is disappointing :

[Qu1tter]

Jesus Christ.

[Oncewasblueandyellowtwo]

And not once was I reminded that men commit the vast majority of sexual assault cases.
But you agree that men commit the vast majority of sexual offences.
Jfc just because no one reminded YOU, but we fucking know who does it and we don't forget.

[CarolDanvers]

🤦‍♀️

[RedToothBrush]

MTF trans can create their own services. The way women did. Why don't you help them do that, instead of supporting them transgressing female boundaries?

Trans people are deserving of services. But they have unique needs, as do women. Ultimately ignoring the elephant in the room does help either group. Trying to be nice to avoid the elephant in the room is actively harmful.

Specialist services to meet the needs of both is appropriate and serves everyone better.

[Karabair]

I support males who claim to be women is a different kind of politics entirely

[JoxerGoesToStuttgart]

This is what I always say!! Men always bitch and moan about the services they aren't allowed in.
Why aren't there men's refuges? Why isn't there men's aid?
Well why don't you do what women had to do and buckle down and fight tooth and damn nail for it. Through blood sweat and government funding cuts.

You see they think women were just given all these things. They think women’s shelters and rape crisis centres were just plonked down in towns and cities and women were invited to use them.

[Oncewasblueandyellowtwo]

CarolDanvers
Isn't there some saying about not being able to name the people who persecute you?

[JoxerGoesToStuttgart]

@CarolDanvers I initially thought Kirsty’s comment was tongues in cheek but now I’m not sure!

[UglyGlassVase]

If you want a page that supports all survivors of sexual assault I think that's fantastic. I don't understand why it isn't called "I believe you".

Surely to god a male survivor of sexual assault would be less likely to look for support on this page?

If it's just for people who go by her/she then you are excluding women who don't go by those pronouns.

I am genuinely baffled by this. If you want it to support everybody why "her"?

[Karabair]

Radical feminists set up the first rape crisis centres, radical lesbian feminists very often. They consciousness raised and listened to women and about what men do to us. Through them we all learned the truth about ourselves and what had happened to us. Men's sexual terrorism towards us had never been acknowledged before, it took huge amounts of work and effort to recognise this as a political issue for women. These women knew the importance of female only space, for healing but also as a tool for political organisation to resist men's crimes against us.

It's disgusting that radical feminists are now renamed "TERFs" and excluded and shut down and slandered by people like you FrothyDragon. And you call it "ethics". I don't think so.

[BettyFloop]

Having read this thread so far:
"I/we believe her", in context, means I/we believe female victims/survivors of sexual violence.
If it's a board for survivors of sexual violence then the sex of the survivor is key - as is the sex of the abuser: ergo the poster. You can't muck about with it by saying things like "everybody" because then traumatised survivors will find themselves 'in company' with those of the same sex as their abuser. That's re-traumatising and abusive in itself.

This concerns me way more than any flinging around of the t* word.

Successful recovery/support services for rape/csa survivors is a specialist field - male or female (it impacts us differently) - and it sounds like this group, albeit created with good intentions, is horrifyingly amateur and potentially damaging as a result.

Also; I'd quite like to know what's meant by people like Posie Parker
What does that actually mean?

[ChipOnMyOvary]

people like Posie Parker

that means people who have the ability to think for themselves

[BettyFloop]

Same team Chip - think for ourselves, believe what we know, act on our knowledge/experience.
Fight for the liberation of women and children as a result.

[FreckledLeopard]

What a pathetic kick in the teeth for women. You want to be tolerant and welcoming of men - set up a separate page. Don't pretend you give a flying fuck about women though when you're centring men's feelings over women's sexual assault.

[BettyFloop]

Well.....yes.
That's it in a nutshell.

[GeorgeFayne]

You have every right to set the boundaries of your own page, and I support that 100%. We also have every right to not visit your page, and I will be one who no longer does.

You have chosen your "side," if you will. You will be cheered by Rachel and Stephanie and Riley and Joss, perhaps even Jessica. I hope you find they are equally committed to protecting spaces and services for women. (Sadly, I think you'll be disappointed. They have proven themselves to be more concerned about the special XY variety.)

At for me, I'll stand with the likes of Sheila and Linda, the late Magdalen, and yes, even the infamous Posie. I know with 100% certainty that these feminists WILL always center females.

Go well.

[2BthatUnnoticed]

The page doesn’t support Panem’s friend because her rapist was a TW? WTF!? “this page does not support your friend,” how cruel.

I didn’t know the impetus for the page started on MN.

[2BthatUnnoticed]

Or was it because at the time of the rapes, she was married to the rapist?? Seems bizarre either way, am I misreading it??

[MrsJamin]

I know her personally, and it's a topic extremely close to her heart.
This says everything we need to know about your "ethics". Do you not think female rape victims hold women-only spaces extremely close to their hearts? Or do they not matter as much because they are not "mates"?

[ChickenNuggetsChipsAndBeans]

I have heard the phrase "I believe her" on MN and found it incredibly powerful and thought provoking. I am really sorry this message is being diluted.

I am fed up of being told that incredibly vulnerable women need to shift to over and make allowances. Haven't they had their physical and sexual boundaries totally compromised already, they need protection not to be told to be inclusive.

Why is it rape centres, women's support groups and organisations that promote women's reproductive wellbeing that are being targeted.

This movement seems centred on a need to control womens speach, language, sexual health and choices and identity. It just does not seem right.

[SonicVersusGynaephobia]

As for the person who used "TERF", I have deleted her comments, but have not banned her. I know her personally, and it's a topic extremely close to her heart.

Oh, that's OK then. To hell with traumatised women and girls.

Your "ethics" are abysmal.

[yulet]

"I believe her as long as she puts men's needs first"

Seriously what a fucking shitshow of a men's rights movement this is. And there are women out there who are still frantic to capitulate to anything that men say they want.

[exLtEveDallas]

#IBelieveHer. I always will. She was a woman abused, raped, disbelieved, mocked and hounded for being raped by a footballer. A woman who lost friends and family because she was raped by a footballer. A woman who had her life ruined because she was raped by a footballer.

No matter how vocal we are, no matter how much support we give and no matter how much love we show she is still all those things. Some of us gave at cost to ourselves, but we don't regret it. She is still believed.

#IBelieveHer but I can no longer follow the page...I was there in my own name, and now looking at the friends list with unveiled eyes - it is not safe to do that.

I'm sorry Frothy, it breaks my heart. Maybe I'll see you on Twitter. #AlwaysBelieve