"Would you date a trans person?" Mostly, no. So you're basically killing them.

[Lamaha]

www.westernjournal.com/study-claims-transgenders-suffering-straight-people-arent-dating/?utm_source=Facebook&utm_medium=PostTopSharingButtons&utm_campaign=websitesharingbuttons&fbclid=IwAR3CCd-QbUiftS3m57Zf8KLHAE309pl3HzHmwNqKjv1IHrc3ODC76wm3PdY

Is anyone surprised by the result?
But: it's simply transphobia. People need to wake up.
Biological men and women who need to get with the times. Just like white people wouldn't date people of colour back in the day,
... it is not until the straight community begins dating transgenders at a higher rate that Western civilization will truly show itself to be accepting and safe for the LGBT community.

“(I)t is one thing to make space for diverse gender identities within our workplaces, schools, washrooms and public spaces,” Blair wrote. “But it is another to fully include and accept gender diversity within our families and romantic relationships.

So, now that they've won the loos and prisons and hospitals, the next goal is in sight... and it's US.
People, prepare for girldick etc.

Sounds a lot like like the Incel lot.

So we have to have sex with a trans person because otherwise it's transphobic?
Glad to be an invisible middle aged woman.

I too would like it on record that I am willing to take one for the team for when Jason Momoa abandons his disgustingly phobic refusal to date middle aged white women.

@PenguindreamsofDraco your sacrifice is so stunning and brave x

"Date us or we'll harm/kill ourselves."

Well, that's not emotionally manipulative and controlling at all is it?

@chiararimini, I know what you mean. I'm 49 and invisible I suppose. Or am I being killed by all the men with their own hair, teeth, waistlines who only notice younger women/

Well, that's not emotionally manipulative and controlling at all is it?

... or, like, literally abusive?

I have a friend who, as a verybyoung woman, dated a (very bog-standard XY no gender issues involved) kind of bloke wirh roughly this attitude. Unsurprisingly, a restraining order eventually played a part in the story.

Again, prejudice doesn't matter in this one, particular regard. Dating and sex are by definition a matter of individual preference and not subject to ideals of fairness etc.

So, sue me, dark haired blokes of planet earth - I've never dated one of you!

Thank you Craig. I am taking my place in the alphabet soup I am henceforth U for unrealistic (+)

Craic!

One of the things that turn me on is a man being relaxed and comfortable in his own skin. A functioning penis is a must. Plus I think gender ideology is bollocks. It would be like getting into a relationship with a religious fundamentalist. So I can't imagine dating a trans person, male or female.

I compare transition to having a full face tattoo. Do it if you really want to, but be aware that it will dramatically reduce your dating pool. That this is not being spelled out to young people seems downright cruel. I remember seeing an interview with Jazz Jennings about dating in which it was painfully obvious no one had been honest with the poor kid.

Just as an aside........i’m watching an old TOTP on BBC4, playing now...Lola...which was a bit ahead of it’s time really!

@unboxaLoeweHammock also being a straight woman who definitely never shags lesbians helps I think...as why would any self-respecting "transbian" be interested in me?

As a child of the eighties I loved guys who wore make-up, big hair, high heels etc, whether they were Goths or David Bowie. But... if any of them had insisted he was actually a woman, that would have been an absolute turn-off for me. Even if the person himself was really attractive, the mixed signals would have been too confusing.

How on earth can anyone tell people who they "should" be forming a relationship with?

If your white friend told you they would never consider dating a black person would you think less of them? Yes. Does that person have an absolute right not to date black people? Yes.

Sex and dating is a funny business. What TRAs don't seem to get is that fancying someone =/= wanting to sleep with them. I've read so many times things like "so if you found a man attractive then found out he had a vagina you'd suddenly stop being attracted to him?" Maybe not but I'd definitely stop wanting to sleep with him. Because I only like dick. That's it. It's not my only requirement, but it's a 100% necessity. Many years ago I had a mega crush on a woman. She was amazing, gorgeous, clever, fun. I'd never had feelings for a woman before and it hit me right between the eyes. She described herself as Bi when I met her and I know she had feelings for me too, but nothing happened between us because I just don't like vagina. Trust me, if I could have got over that I would have in a heartbeat. But every time I tried to imagine doing any more than kiss her I felt repulsed. I just don't like vaginas. It made me very very sad. Some time later she redefined herself as queer and started dating and TW. She talked about it being the ultimate fuck you to her homophobic extremely religious parents, that not only did she have a girlfriend but that her girlfriend had a penis. I just sort of nodded and smiled, realised I didn't have clue wtf she was talking about and made a mental note to go home and look it up. At which point I realise that not only did I not understand it, but no one else seemed to either. In many ways that was the start of my journey to becoming GC I think haha.

50%, 50% of trans people have attempted suicide that's an awfully hign number, but thankfully not true. Did they ever read that research paper they have linked?
RESULTS: Nearly 14% of adolescents reported a previous suicide attempt; disparities by gender identity in suicide attempts were found. Female to male adolescents reported the highest rate of attempted suicide (50.8%)

If your white friend told you they would never consider dating a black person would you think less of them? Yes.

Why? If you don't find a certain characteristic attractive then you don't find it attractive. It's not a value judgement. Unless you mean someone who does find black people attractive but still refuses to date them specifically because they're making a value judgement.

I was going to post who the mass exclusions from my potential dating pool would be and it made me sound horrible. Basically on purely physical looks white, Northern European men. And then men who have no or very weak religious beliefs , whose politics are moderate centre left or centre right and in my social class. And anyone who prefers sport over the arts need not bother applying either

Just re-read that- to be clear , that isn't who I'm excluding but who is getting into my pool.

Totally agree LetsSplashMummy

The truth might be hurtful, but it's less harmful in the long run.

Suicide stats never include co morbidities, particularly Autism, anorexia and other issues that have high suicide rates, which doesn't help get a true picture of what the issues are.

And the answer to people feeling suicidal is sorting out proper, responsive, high quality mental health support. Not pressuring people to try and medicate them with sex. Getting involved with a someone sufficiently depressed and struggling with their identity to the point of suicide is a really, really bad move for both people. Anything that puts the responsibility for a person's feelings onto others and helps them avoid dealing with them is not healthy or helpful. This is basically an appeal for people to get into co-dependency.

Sexual validation isn't a treatment for suicidal feelings. And if it was, it would not be something the general public should be trying to treat on an amateur basis, surely?

At my age I am not going to date, never mind what my husband would have to say about it if I did.

People date because they like and are attracted to another person. They are also entitled, and are at liberty to, turn down an offer of a date with no questions asked.

It's coming to something if we are considered prejudiced for not wanting to date a transman. I wouldn't want to have a relationship other than friendship with a transman. I'm a heterosexual woman, why would I be dating a woman? Because a transman is and always will be basically a woman with some modifications.

Well quite, Michelleoftheresistance.

And there's the angle that suicidally depressed people are extremely unattractive. Misery and a strong whiff of imbalance. No thanks. Drives people away like little else. And I speak as someone who has been suicidally depressed.

That headline reads like something an incel would write about women. What's the difference really?

Well according to that tweet we are all supposed to accept that strap ons are just as good as cis men’s dicks. So that really shouldn’t stop us.

Except I quite like my partner to have rather a lot of sensation in his appendage because funnily enough his enjoyment is quite important to me.

Not to mention the fact that I don’t find the idea of having a gigantic bit of rubber/plastic inserted IN me particularly pleasant, in fact the idea makes me wince at the idea of the pain.

But my pain wouldn’t matter I suppose. So I’ll just accept my label of Bigot, Transphobe etc.

If your white friend told you they would never consider dating a black person would you think less of them? Yes.

I also say "Why?" to this. If someone genuinely doesn't find black people physically attractive, like people can be turned off by all kinds of physical attributes that are not their thing, but treats black people they meet with complete respect, I'm not sure what they're doing wrong.

I'm even less sure when I think that the cure would be for them having to be willing to date people they don't find attractive. Which takes us back to incel territory.