Allow prostitution in care homes

[JoggerBottom]

This reads like a spoof article, but the information has come from Royal College of Nursing guidance:

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6425741/Sex-guide-care-home-residents-advises-nurses-help-OAPs-download-PORN-use-sex-toys.html

What about nurses, other residents and the prostitutes. I still thought that prostitution was illegal in the U.K.?

Sorry if the link isn't clicky, I'm not very tech savvy.

Women as commodities. I wonder if the guidance includes male prostitutes for female residents.
(not that it should imo but I suspect that never even arose as an issue)

Some is fine. No issue with people wanting to be naked or cross dressing in their own home.

WTAF this is just another assault on women’s boundaries. How consulted on this document?

Is there any guidance been issued on the rights of women to have their boundaries and dignity respected at work and into their old age?

How is that not sexual Harassment of female staff expecting them to facilitate porn and masturbation and procuring women for sex? What if they have ethical objections?

Let me guess, guardian not covering this? Ffs

That the nurse should support someone find a sex worker crosses a line imo - and potentially a safeguarding nightmare!

But its quite a heartening read that sex lives are being considered.

Bringing prostitutes into care homes has always happened. It's nothing new hence the need for official guidance. A lot of the time family members help facilitate this rather than staff but obviously staff are aware of it as visitors need to be signed in.

Prostitution, as in money for sex, isn't illegal in the UK. There are offences which discourage the kind of prostituion which impinges negatively on third parties such as kerb-crawling and running a brothel (more than one prostitute in a given location).

Thanks Charles, I don't have a lot of time to research in the mornings.

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/let-elderly-make-love-not-cocoa-care-homes-told-m9njdlf59?shareToken=5e279f3e35897e21148566f908fae65b

There was a thread a little while ago about something similar.

The argument is a ‘wedge’ one.

Prostitution of women is wrong
Oh but how about for these disabled men? You’d deny disabled people? You MONSTER (insert usual happy hooker story here.)

It’s a wedge argument. Men are not entitled to sex. Disabled men are not entitled to sex. No one is entitled to sex.

It’s still prostitution. It still drives the trade in humans, and the rape and trafficking of women and children. So no.

Apparently not.

While selling/buying sex is legal in the UK as I understand it, there are specific offences around the act which are illegal:

Soliciting in public
Running a brothel
Curb crawling
Pimping and coercing someone into prostitution
Trafficking
And anyone under 18 is treated as a victim

www.cps.gov.uk/legal-guidance/prostitution-and-exploitation-prostitution

I really don’t understand how Leeds council have been able to suspend (ignore?!) these laws.

The law seems complicated and confused to me. I am not confident that women are not routinely exploited.

RCN spokeswoman Dawne Garrett told the Daily Express: 'Just because people live in a care home doesn't mean they lose the same rights, choices and responsibilities they once enjoyed in their home.'

But they’re not in their own home. You’re right, Jogger, what about the other residents and the nurses and carers who have to facilitate this?

It's weird to think about abstractly but it's not their fault that we find it weird to think about, and being denied the sexual practices they have always enjoyed because we find it weird is dehumanising and unfair.

This is something I never had to think about but I'm dating someone 40 years my senior. He's in his mid 60s and perfectly able to look after his own home now, but I rationally know there may well be a time he isn't. And he's been involved in the BDSM scene for 40 years, so I expect sexually he'd still be as inclined in his 80s as he is now. I can't imagine him not being so. And to think he'd be denied things like pornography because of squeamishness when he's spent a lot of time researching/collecting Victorian erotica is a bit sad. It's part of him, a part of him I love & enjoy. I'm sure many people would think that was weird but again, it's dehumanising to deny someone what they are into just because it's weird.

The article says a care home resident asked a nurse to help with masturbation. Disgusting old pervert. He should understand that it’s private and not the job of a paid professional. Do what you want in private but don’t expect nurses etc to facilitate you.

That was my thoughts TealTurnip and somehow this is being conflated with people thinking old people continuing their sex lives is weird. Staggering.

This isnt about elderly people continuing a healthy sex life with a partner in a private setting.

It’s about prostitution.

The "what about when you're old when sex has been such a central part of your life" argument doesn't wash.

Part of getting older is coming to terms with not being able to do stuff you used to be (I'm noticing this even in my 50s - my knees are too shagged to run any more). Mountaineering was a big, big part of my life when I was younger - does that mean that in my 70s or 80s I should be allowed to fly to Nepal and pay a sherpa to put their life at risk carrying me up a mountain?

Nope, if ou have got to an age where you can't engage in the activities you used to, freely, and with the consent of the other participants, then you just have to accept that that part of your life is done.

If you can't get sex consensually, sorry, tough shit. Live without. It's not gonna kill you.

It’s not about squeamishness with older people’s sexual desires.
It’s about other people, in their paid employment, having to facilitate those desires.

What FermatsTheorem said

If you can't get sex consensually, sorry, tough shit.

Quite.

Rixera
being denied the sexual practices they have always enjoyed because we find it weird is dehumanising and unfair.

Sorry what?

Not being able to pay to rape someone is dehumanizing now?

I don't feel sorry enough for any man to offer up my sisters to satiate the 'sexual practices' he's spent a lifetime cultivating.

Not getting your elderly dick wet exactly how you like is not fucking dehumanizing.

You know what is dehumanizing? Being sold as a piece of rape meat.

Un. Be. Lievable.

I would be deeply, DEEPLY offended if I was told to facilitate any of this as part of my work. Sorry for the old people not being able to carry on as before but nurses are not sex workers and I don't approve of porn and there's no way I would agree to do any of this.
Also, let's be honest here, realistically not every resident of any old people's home is going to be a sweet old man who still has "needs". Sex offenders get old too. So nurses would be expected to help them access websites or masturbate or whatever?

Thankfully it's not a dilemma I will face as I don't work in a care home but I think it's a huge insult to those who do to expect their job description to include this.

Rixera dehumanising to deny someone what they are into just because it's weird. Wow you are so cool and amazingly woke, the rest of are just seriously upright. You are seriously saying that at what 20 odd you never considered your 60+ year old partner is aging.……

Also, let's be honest here, realistically not every resident of any old people's home is going to be a sweet old man who still has "needs"

Indeed. Paedophiles, rapists and all other manner of unpleasant people also get old and my sympathy is firmly with the care workers having to deal with them.

When I was 20 and in one of my first serious jobs, I was FORCED by my employer to handle pornography both in print and online. I left the job after about 6 weeks when I couldn't endure it anymore. He found a way to twist my job description so it covered handling HIS personal pornography. It was horrible. Of course it was sexual harassment.

NO woman should be put in the position of having to facilitate a man's porn habit just so she can feed her family. Disgraceful.

Nope, if ou have got to an age where you can't engage in the activities you used to, freely, and with the consent of the other participants, then you just have to accept that that part of your life is done.

If you can't get sex consensually, sorry, tough shit. Live without. It's not gonna kill you.

Hear, hear.

How many old women are asking for young male escorts to be shipped in, I wonder?

But it's not about being 'woke' it's about conflating all the different issues addressed in that article.

Obvs booking a prostitute (which is also not rape? I have friends in the sex industry, used to do some pay for play stuff myself, trafficking is not all prostitution) is a different issue to allowing them privacy & pornography use in their own rooms.

There's different lines of appropriate, asking nurses to masturbate them is obviously not okay, being allowed the respectful privacy to masturbate or engage sexually with partners is okay.

And yes I have of course considered that he is aging but I don't spend all my time thinking about what kind of sex we'll be having in 20 years time. I don't want to have to think about putting the man I love in a care home. I will probably have to one day, but it's hardly a happy line of thought.

Also it's a shame women aren't allowed to treat their sexual desires the same way. Older women using vibrators/ male company should also be addressed.