What peak transed you

[Politelygiveszerofucks]

I know this has probably been done to death, not sure if there is another thread somewhere, but briefly, what was it that peak transed you? I don't mean long philosophical essays, but was there something or a specific incident which suddenly made that lightbulb switch on?

Lots of little things were making me uneasy, (and in retrospect I think a friend might have gently led me with what she posted!) but two really stood out. I went to a lit fest with my 12yo daughter, and there was a panel about feminism in YA. I was really keen for her to hear it, it was packed with bright young female authors clearly saying NO to men, to male violence, to rape and porn and objectification. And this scratty bloke (who I now guess would be enby or whatever) stood up and harangued them about Caitlin Morgan's views on trans. The whole panel recited TRANS WOMEN ARE WOMEN like the fucking borg, one after the other. It was eerie. Amidst the gnashing of teeth about how "disappointing" older feminists, I turned to my daughter and said "bollocks". No conscious thought, it was just such an obvious lie! She gave me the "mum you are so cringe" look and said "duh".

Not long after, the "cervix havers" thing came up, and I pointed out on someone's thread that it was a difficult phrase if you didn't have English as your first language, or had learning difficulties. Because, you know, education is kinda my job, so some experience here. And this greasy bloke ripped me and some other women I know to shreds - stopped short of calling me a transphobe, but you've seen it - all about the feels and the poor transwomen violence blah blah. As it happens, I've known this guy online for years, I know he's a trolling wanker of the highest degree, so it just made me angry. I messaged one of the other women to tell her not to take it to heart, and she said the magic words "rad fem".

So here I am. Thanks, greasy dudes, I've read all those feminist books I've been meaning to for years, inoculated my daughters against bollocks and discovered Mumsnet

Trans prisoners. Not the Tara Hudson kind necessarily, but the spate more recently who are clearly a danger to women.

The cotton ceiling.

The trashing of a women's event at the Vancouver Women's Library by aggressive males, claiming to be trans sex workers.

The shutting down of MichFest Michigan Womyn's Music Festival

Tammika Brent being hospitalised by (transgender) Fallon Fox, with concussion and a broken orbital bone.

Brents says transgender fighters in MMA just isn't fair.

Caitlyn Jenner winning Woman of the Year (6 mths after transitioning).

Daniel Muscato saying "Anyone who says I'm not a woman can suck my lady dick". On International Women's Day.

Alex Drummond's beard "widening the band length of womanhood" and Stonewall (see also Lord Michael Cashman).

No-platforming of Julie Bindel and Germaine Greer.

Lily Madigan, Heather Peto, Sophie Cook accessing women's roles, AWS, and places on the Jo Cox Leadership program.

The assault on Maria MacLachlan at Speaker's Corner.

The trans weightlifter, the picture of the basket ball team with a transwoman 2ft taller than the girls, the Iranian football team containing about 8 transwomen, Hannah Mouncey playing Australian football on women's teams.

Attacks & no-platforming of Derrick Jensen for criticising Queer Theory

The attacks, rape threats and abuse of women on social media, by trans-activists.

The losing women their jobs, being expelled from political parties for speaking out on behalf of women, and refusing to say TWAW. (Dr Harrop).

Ponting, White, Challenor et al.

Women MPs happily agreeing that 50% men and 50% women MPs would be just fine.

#Transgirls and #GirlsLikeUs hashtags on Twitter.

I'm sure I've missed lots out.

I have to add I'm not against transgender people in general (though I don't believe they can actually change sex) as I do know the struggles they have had through their lives and it is them who are being overshadowed by this more militant ideology described here and elsewhere on MN. Thats what our own critics don't understand.

Caitlin Jenner, specifically their coy reticence about whether they’d had “the op” and the dawning realisation that “transwomen” weren’t what I thought they were. Swiftly followed by Hampstead Ponds.

Riley J Dennis videos on YouTube.

Booking marking ToeToToe thats a great list to help me when I chat to people about this.

Someone started a thread on Horse and Hound forum of all places... "Can men get periods?" And it brought to my attention the idea that talking about periods was thought to be "transphobic" ... it was a jet propelled ride to the Peak for me from there really. Once I started to think about it. And then read. And then I met the idea of the cotton ceiling and there really is no going back from there.

Yeah - 'men can have periods too', and even more outrageous "transwomen have periods, just without the blood"

How to fake menstrual blood, complete fetishisation of women's biology (one aspect of autogynephilia).

I think it was probably reading or listening to the stories of multiple parents of various trans children and realising that in many cases, the children had clearly absorbed the message ‘boys/girls don’t do/like that’ and had logically deduced ‘I like what girls like, so therefore I must BE a girl’ but because the parents were so rigid about gender stereotypes (whilst simultaneously claiming not to be) they allowed the kid to start to believe they were literally the opposite sex, instead of letting a boy play with barbie 😳
And it all just seemed so mental that I realised I no longer even believe that trans is a real thing. I just don’t. It’s bullshit.

Also, a video of a transwoman inserting a tampon into their neovagina, (not as graphic as it sounds, thankfully) and seeming like a pleasant person, but clearly not understanding that women don’t enjoy or get off on putting tampax in. His face was so confused, so disappointed, so crestfallen. It clearly had never occurred to the person that we just wear tampax to absorb menstrual blood, not to validate our womanhood or titilate ourselves. Like, fancy having an operation to try and make yourself into a woman, but having no understanding at all about women, beyond that we have vaginas and tits 😳

In all honesty, it was the FWR boards on here. You wonderful women helped me tap into the nagging feeling I had that I was going against something - I couldn't even articulate what it was - every time I had over the years nodded sympathetically, acquiesced and otherwise accommodated trans ideology. I now know what I was going against. I was going against reality. And truth. That's why I felt so uncomfortable.

It also brought into sharp relief an experience I had maybe twenty years ago, working as a temp in a health administration setting. I got a call five minutes before I was due to finish for the day. I'd had a miscarriage a couple of days before, was still bleeding and cramping, but couldn't afford to take time off because I was an agency temp.

The call was from a transwoman who elucidated at some length how distressed she was that her doctor referred to her as a man. I could do literally nothing about this - I was a low grade admin worker, and a temp. I was paid £4.50 an hour (in London). I listened and listened and listened - for at least half an hour. I wasn't getting paid, I was worried about flooding through my clothes, but she just kept going on and on.

And so I allowed this person's preoccupation with being seen as a woman - when she wasn't - to take precedence over my own actual medical needs which arose precisely because I am a woman.

Now I fully accept responsibility for doing this - I should have cut the call, gone home and taken painkillers and slept and it wasn't entirely her fault that I didn't. (Although, she should really have known that people don't generally work after 5.30 pm.) But it seems to me pretty symbolic as to what women are being expected to do right now - to backshelf their own needs which arise because of what sex they are in order to accommodate people who are not women.

And I'm older now, and give far less of a shit than I used to, and I won't be doing that again.

Very simply, that the feelings of men trump the potential safety of women and girls.

That and the disregard for the importance of scientific terminology.

An American company selling bras for young teens got ripped apart for saying their bras were for girls because some boys need bras too.

Owen Jones & cunnilingusgate

What on Earth? I’ve had him on block for years so I missed that. The mind boggles!

Mine was when my teen was pathologised and told she had been taught to fear & hate after she expressed anxieties about getting undressed with those with male bodies.

And when I had an organised Twitter pile-on which went 24/7, as London went to bed San Fran woke up and a bunch of transwomen fantasised how droopy my boobs must be and speculated on the appearance of my vulva and labia given that I have a larger than usual number of children.

Those people who pretend to be trans to access women-only spaces (esp. women's prisons). Not only because it affects those women (which really pisses me off - in a lot of cases these women have suffered beyond belief!) but also because it damages the cause of those who genuinely need to transition or have transitioned and want to live quiet, happy and fulfilled lives.

I believe in biological sex. I also believe in supporting those people who are genuine transitioners. It's complex but not beyond the wit of humans, surely?

Having a transwoman patient rrfuse a side room and instead demand and then be placed in a 6 bedded female bay with 5 women,.some of whom were extremely confused as to why this 6ft person with a beard was in the single sex bay with them. It was very distressing for their relatives as well.

And then Danielle Muscardo and the whole "suck my lady dick"

IW discussing choosing her lady bits from a catalogue on CBB.

Seeing people who claimed to be feminists supporting a woman being punched in the face because she was a ‘terf’. I’d had mini peaks before but that sent me over the edge.

Somebody tell us about cunnilingusgate. I gave up even trying to read young Mr Jones a good while back.

Someone on Twitter had posted a story about a woman raping a man, in a snarky kind of 'see - women can be monsters too' fashion. It didn't take much further reading to discover that, surprise surprise, the 'female' rapist had been in possession of a fully functioning penis. I duly pointed this out, but then realised that if I took it much further I'd end up being labelled the horrible nasty transphobe, thoughtcrime being even less acceptable than actual violence.

A political group claiming that their representation of women was marginally better than it appeared because one of the men in the photo of their members was actually a woman. This was a man with stereotypically unremarkable hair/clothes/name - there was literally no way to see from the photo that he thought he was a woman, i.e. his male privilege was fully intact. And the woman who had commented sarcastically about what a sausage fest it was fucking apologised. Suddenly she was on the back foot, the one who needed to be more progressive.

Something just twigged. I thought hang on a minute we could have complete male domination, worse than it is now, but if a few of those men claimed to be women we'd all have to shut up and take it.

Everything else soon fell into place.

1986 watching misogynist drag queens in gay clubs.

The gg thing this week took me from very angry to doing something about it.
And my ex too.
And both of us are very stand back and let other people do the fighting people. But we've peaked hard

That whole "cotton ceiling" thing, the harassment of people at Mitchfestival, the "feeling like a woman" thing (which just means a bunch of sexist stereotypes), any disagreement with transactivists and their groupies gets you labeled a "bigot." Being told that I have privilege for being a woman. (If they had said for being, white, straight or abled bodied, fine, but there is no such thing as "female privilege")

It was a culmination of things.

I don't pretend to know or understand any of what is going on at the moment

I was very much in the let everyone be what they want category

But the other day I read about a billboard been taken down as it had the definition of women on?

I was was just confused!? Why is what I am offensive? So I started to read bits

Why is calling a trans women wrong and why am I now suddenly a cis women??

I tried to explain it to my DH confused the fuck out of the pair of us!

I am a women, a female human and I want to feel safe in female spaces, I say this not to jump on a bandwagon but as a victim of abuse who wants to feel safe, I am worried what this all means

Any posters who would like to enlighten me further I would be greatful as I feeling like I am sinking in an ocean of info!!