What peak transed you

[Politelygiveszerofucks]

I know this has probably been done to death, not sure if there is another thread somewhere, but briefly, what was it that peak transed you? I don't mean long philosophical essays, but was there something or a specific incident which suddenly made that lightbulb switch on?

I didn’t find female puberty, in and of itself, shit. But middle-aged men calling themselves girls and claiming it still pisses me off massively.

Oh and Dr Adrian Harrop saying that women have appropriated the word "woman" from transwomen, on national tv.

Years and years and years of Jess Bradley et al. Trying sooooo hard to be a 'good ally'. They said that it was impossible for me not to have an internal sense of being a woman, and that saying I don't is transphobic. My internal understanding of my own mind is wrong, so I must work to change it in accordance with the holy writ of JB. Years of being told 'it never happens' for things which I had seen myself with my own eyes. Trying to edit my own perceptions and memories, because I had to support trans people who were the most oppressed of all.
For a while then Jess was campaigning a lot about 'parental alienation' within a student context. Good, this is an important issue, and one I can relate to having parents in an abusive relationship. But no. Parental alienation is something special and much worse when experienced by trans people. Definitely worse for trans people than parents who disown you for being gay, or parents who are physically and emotionally abusive when you have to go home because student accommodation closes over the holidays and it's too cold to camp over Christmas. Worst of all for Jess Bradley the eternal victim who must be the focus of attention in all things.
That was a very early example. I squashed all my misgivings down for more than a decade, because clearly I must centre trans people and especially JB over my own transphobic feelings, and if I committed wrongthink I should 'die terf scum'. I was raised to tiptoe around explosively unpredictable male violence, so all this set off fewer alarm bells than it should have done.
Then I found out about the flashing from JB's ex-wife, the only person in my social circle brave enough to even mention it. They have nothing to do with each other any more, and haven't for years, because predictably enough JB is emotionally abusive to women they are in relationships with.
That led me to Mumsnet because it was one of very few places with any information. Turned out that Mumsnet was not in fact full of people shouting 'die trans scum', this being something that TRAs were more likely to shout at anyone who isn't them, including other trans people (#truscum).
I'm still terrified of talking openly about this, because I know how vicious TRAs can be, I've heard how they talk when nobody's watching. There is one person outside you lot who I can talk to about any of this. I'd love to go to a real world meeting, but I would definitely be recognised by the TRAs.
Someone I know posted the latest video from A Woman's Place on Facebook, to complain about how it is horrible to trans people. I watched it and in my flat with nobody but the cat to see me, I cried because I could identify with it so much.

UndercoverGC

(Hugs Undercover)

I too have seen the way TRAs talk when they don't think anyone who disagrees is watching, and it's terrifying.

Bless you, Undercover.

We will get there.You know the evidence of your own eyes and ears, you will be shown to be right in the end, and you will be able to speak about it eventually, if we get our way. They won't be able to police us all and the rest of the world for ever. The facade is already cracking.

Please take care of yourself. Big hug. You know you'll always have integrity that none of them do and that is priceless.

The behaviour of TRAs.

I'm so sorry, Undercover. I hope it's brings comfort to know there are other women here who see what you see. You're not alone. Far from it.

So many women have tried to be nice, be good allies, stuff down their own needs and opinions and when they finally can't do it any more they get abused and threatened. Says volumes about the way TRA's take full advantage of male privilege to advance their ideology.

I saw a photo on FB with the tagline "boys have periods too". The person in the photo looked like a boy but with legs open and period blood on display and a look on their face that dared me to disagree. I tried to argue with my own thoughts but ultimately, I could not agree that the person in the photo was male. I could not lie to myself in that way. I eventually found Magdalena Berns and once I talked myself out of the horror that "she can't say that" I realised that we are fully and totally being forced to lie. I can no longer lie to myself and force my children to lie about this stuff.

Rhynswynd

I have seen that photo, it was circulated round twitter as a meme next to trumps face with the tag line ‘shit like this is how I got elected’

Final nail in coffin for me was the Green Party 'non-men' description.

No thank. I am a women.

The men in female prison stance, I learnt about it on here and couldn't recall reading anything in the media at that time.

It hit home because at the time my female friend was in prison, she was an alcoholic with MH issues it was a non violent crime. She was/is also a rape victim.

When she was inside I didn't have have to worry about her drinking or being violently or sexually assaulted by her partner, except on reading mumsnet I realised I still did.

Reading www.terfisaslur.com peak transed me. And made me very angry.

What peaked me was that 'trans women are women' but natal women are called 'cis women' by the trans lot.
So a natal woman can't just be called woman.

They have stolen the word woman.

Hence Posies excellent campaign/poster to reclaim this word.

For me it was a certain high-profile Stonewall advisor claiming to ‘bring out the inner lesbian’ in straight women. Straight women who evidently fancy bearded dudes.

I used to think the increase in people adopting an unexpected gender presentation was cool because it would break down stereotypes and mean that ‘gender’ would eventually stop being a thing. Little did I know that trans ideology would be about reinforcing gender stereotypes, colonising womanhood and punishing heretics.

That's a powerful post Undercover .

Can I suggest that you namechange ASAP and then keep posting here?

You are in a supportive place.

JB had a WIFE???

I'd had a night binging on Magdaeln Berns so was already pretty peaked bu then I had this discussion on Twitter and I really really got it. This aint a woman it's a creepy wierd guy

DJ Lippy
‏I don't think you understand human biology do you?
Women is not a gender identity. You cannot choose to be a woman. You are born a woman with a womans body. You can make cosmetic alterations to your body, take hormones, even have a 'lady brain.' It does not make you a woman.

Elesbian
Lol, don't call yourself a socialist, you'd rather side with pro-life tories than consider the FACT that you're wrong about something which you have zero experience in. How does it feel to be on the losing side? The mainstream left doesn't want your regressive views any more.

DJ Lippy
How do you know? That's a bit judgmental don't you think? Assuming someones gender like that. You don't know what you're talking about do you? The GRA is a Tory law. Teresa May fully supports these proposed changes. Also, lesbians don't have penises

Elesbian
‏I wasn't talking about that, terfs supported a Tory endorsed event which was there to attack trans people. And I prefer the term girl cock but you can think about it however you want baby 😘

DJ Lippy
it's not a girl cock it's a penis.

Elesbian
As I said, just keep imagining it 😘 maybe we should take this to dm's, it's wrong to be horny on my main

DJ Lippy
‏I wonder'ed how long it would take you to get all weird and rapey.

Elesbian
You're the one who keeps bringing up my penis, I'm just flirting. Baby I'm sorry ❤️❤️If you're going to bring up my penis, I'm going to flirt, why else would you start talking about my girl cock???

DJ Lippy
‏You started talking about your penis. I stated a scientific fact. Women don't have penis's.

Elesbian
You were the first to bring up lesbians with penises, why are you talking about genitalia if you're not flirting?

Elesbian
‏Also, stop trying to pass of your assumptions as facts, for one it's horribly unscientific and secondly, it's a terrible way to flirt

DJ Lippy
O.K I am going to say this one last time. I'm not flirting with you. Go away and stop being rapey

Elesbian
Fine, we can just be friends then my sweet little egg :3

Elesbian
Though I don't like it when my friends talk about my girl cock, sends weird signals

Elesbian
‏I would say that talking about a strangers genitals is a little rapey so maybe just cut back on that in general

(Needs vomiting smiley)

Holy fuck. Is that for real?

DJ that's dreadful.

I have to say, I've interacted with plenty of lesbians, and none of them have ever spoken to me like that.

Unreal...I wondered if they were just trolling until Harrop said similar.

I was 14 and my mother was writing about a case before the courts asking for medical intervention for a 13/14 year old girl who had grown up with father and uncles and who had truly believed for years that a penis would grow at puberty. And I was confused, but also able to see that this was one of 3-4 cases of this kind to reach the high court here (AUS) and I could appreciate how awful this person who was the same age as me must be feeling at the beginning of puberty. So I knew that gender reassignment was a thing, but rare and there were lots of safeguards in place.

And then ten or so years later I have a baby, and join an international community of women with babies, and women who work with women who have babies. People who were vocal about medical violence towards women in the maternity systems. And then suddenly I was hearing about being more inclusive and being asked to call breastfeeding chest-feeding. And was told that fathers could birth their own children - and not just in movies. So I should shift my language to include pregnant men, men who gestate.

And my eldest boy loved all things pink. And long hair. And ballet. And people started asking coded questions about his gender. (That stopped only recently when his bum length hair was chopped off aged 11).

And there was the Vancouver case. And people telling me that it shouldn’t bother me that male bodied people wanted into female spaces, because my boundaries were/are unfair. And finding out that I’m not even allowed to call myself a woman because that excludes people.

And losing friends for insisting that biology matters. That records should be accurate - listing the mother as the person who gave birth and the father as the one who provided the sperm, not the other way round. Even if both parties have transitioned. That we need to have words to properly record who committed which crimes. That women born female should be allowed to ask for a female doctor/midwife/police officer and actually get one. That women in prison, elderly and disabled women who need personal care, sick women, vulnerable women should have their needs placed above the needs/desires of someone who transitions.

My peak was losing friends because I dared to say out loud that butch lesbians shouldn’t need to become straight men in order to be respected in our society. For saying that feminine boys and masculine girls are mostly just fine. Losing friends because I couldn’t understand why me asking about safeguarding and what feels to me like ‘women-face’ and the consequences of meditating for this rather than providing better counselling.

Not being able to discuss freely with people who I trusted is lonely. But this is what pushed me over the edge.