My elderly parents peak transed today

[MyBeloved]

I was having a lively debate with my parents (both in their 80s and incredibly with it and intelligent) and the subject of womens only safe spaces came up. I decided to tell them about the proposed issues involving TIMs.

And they peak transed.

So begins the spread of this information among their friends, and the ripples will spread.

I'm sorry to ask but I genuinely don't know where to find it..

There was a post on a thread with the "suck my dick" conversation. It was a disgusting exchange and the poster apologised for linking it (or adding the photo/screen shot?)

Could someone either post it again or PM me it? I meant to save it but didn't and want it to hand to use when having these conversations.

I may have got the wording wrong but it was definitely an exchange where the "trans" was extremely disgusting and threatening? Actually I'm unsure if it was the "suck" (bleurgh) one as I'm thinking it was worse?

Gah! Does anyone know what I mean?

Little Charlotte is such a sweetie. ‘Make sure that your parents know mumsnet is a ... transphobic site’

Do teenagers really think that their parents are going to take statements like this as fact and stay away from sites that their offspring consider problematic? My eldest is still only 11 but I am finding it hard to imagine how such a conversation would happen. And if it did happen, this post has actually provided not a whit of evidence for her statement. She appears to be falling into the trap of believing that anything that doesn’t conform with her own understanding is xxxx-phobic.

I explained to my GP a few days ago that she is no longer a woman, because trans women are women and those of us who previously erroneously believed that we were in fact women are now cis-women. To distinguish us from the REAL ACTUAL women who are not us.

I also happened to mention that talking about biology is transphobic. Which, we agreed, might make her job harder, but it’s worth it if even one person is spared the literal violence of being misgendered.

Just in case anyone upthread was considering answering, can I too ask how one knows that they are female if biology, sex organs and mentruation/pregnancy/birth/breastfeeding/postpartum bodies are irrelevant? Should I feel something in particular? Could it be that I am really male if I don’t have that feeling?

I don't have kids, but would have a hard time not laughing if my tween niece earnestly informed me that I needed to stop reading a website that I already was reading because it was "problematic" according to her "research". Is this how children expect relationships with their parents to go in the UK now, or is Charlotte a particularly smug example of the modern teenager?

Most teenagers go thought a phase of thinking their parents are simple minded creatures who are stuck in the past and don't understand how the world works now don't they? She'll grow out of it.

Finally read the linked post, and am laughing (with you as much as at you, Charlotte, if you're reading) because I can remember the life stage where I'd have written very much like that. Except that in my case it was Marxism that I loved to lecture people about. My poor, long suffering working class family who had to listen to far better off than them at the same age teenage me bang on about seizing the means of production. I should send them a hamper to apologize.

Due to the fact that I go to a fairly progressive girls’ school and have friends from all over the gender spectrum

Translation - I'm middle to upper middle class and a bit smug about it, allow me to use my relative privilege to explain these issues to the lumpenproletariat.

How is this suitable behaviour from a group of parents?

If you're a mother then you're everyone's mother! Now act like a loving, indulgent mummy or I'll sneer at you a bit more for being old and thus obviously not with it enough to understand things the way I do.

Like Lang said earlier, I'm certain that I was probably just as smug and annoying when I was a teenager, and I'm glad that no public record exists of that life stage for me. This generation of kids are going to be so embarrassed when they look back at the stuff they put online as adolescents when they're older. At least back when people wrote it in their diary instead the cringe was limited to the one person who found it buried in a box of old stuff later.

I kind of get what some people are saying about going easy on the kid because she is a kid, but at the same time looking back on myself at the same age I'm glad people didn't do that because it would just have prolonged the learning how to engage with the world appropriately and effectively process. I've seen what happens when kids are insulated from that until they're well into their university years, and it's not good.

The combination of incomplete cognitive development and lack of life experience makes it unsurprising that a lot of teenagers don't quite understand why self-ID is such a threat. They may not like our stepping in to preserve their rights for them or understand why we're doing so, but it's still our responsibility as adults to do it. Teenagers have always railed against their elders - it's a life stage, twas ever thus, etc.

Looking on the bright side, if teens do Charlotte’s bidding it opens up numerous parent-child conversation where us “wrong thinking mumosaurs” can present an alternative viewpoint. Cheers Charlotte!

I don't envy you, people who have teenagers! I'm sure my poor mum wished I'd come with a mute button installed at times.

Mine too.

Same goes for babies and toddlers (mute button). Is there a sweet spot where you don’t wish it?

Ah teenagers...the amount of things I am literally a Nazi because of seem endless.

My Nazi like policing of the washing machine otherwise known as if you don't put a cycle in by 9pm on a Sunday you will have no clean clothes on Monday morning.

My Nazi like policing of food otherwise known as if you insist on eating everything the day after a supermarket delivery it's going to be basic rations by the end of the week, also there are others in the household too and food has to be shared.

Such a totalitarian I am!

Most teenagers go thought a phase of thinking their parents are simple minded creatures who are stuck in the past and don't understand how the world works now don't they?

"When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.” Mark Twain

They may not like our stepping in to preserve their rights for them or understand why we're doing so, but it's still our responsibility as adults to do it.

Well, exactly. My two boys aren't like Charlotte - they are basically gender critical but think this trans bollocks is pretty much the mods v rockers of the 2010s and that I am attaching way too much importance to it. Of course they do. They're still youthful. They can't properly conceive of the blood and guts spilled over seventy or eighty years of building up protections and safeguarding. They think it's a fashion and a new fashion will come along soon enough. They can't properly conceive of the levels of damage that will be left in its wake and what will be required to repair it.

Also they're boys, so unless they're GNC for them this stuff will be less threat and more annoyance.

@StopPOP

Do you mean Danielle Muscato?

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/2876810-Danielle-Muscatos-tweet-on-international-womens-day

Well, yes, Lang & Kittens. My son doesn't think men are a risk to women. He's basing this on himself and his nicer friends.

I'm glad that (as far as I can tell) he is lovely to his girlfriend, but I've pointed out to him that he talked over and batted down his sister when she was trying to tell him that some boys their age are total gits. It's as if his personal experience of 'being nice' ought to outweigh her personal experience of being harassed.

Also they're boys, so unless they're GNC for them this stuff will be less threat and more annoyance.

Yes. One's quite GNC in presentation - wears skirts/kilts and leggings and sometimes some make up. The other a typical sporty type. But their main objection is, of course, borne of the selfishness of youth - blue haired whiners spoil all the parties; blue haired whiners have taken over all the uni politics societies; blue haired whiners are generally getting in the way of me having a good time.

That might well be my major objection too if I was their age. I've had encounters with some of the hardcore queer theory true believers and they're the most tedious, self absorbed, wet blanket personality having group of people you could ever meet. Remember when some of them responded to the It Gets Better campaign by saying "not for us it doesn't"? They're awful.

You can't blame them, can you? That's the big problem with youth SJW culture - it's overwhelmingly negative. And the adults who are allowing it to bleed into grown-up politics are so stupid. People do not vote for negative propositions that make them feel bad about themselves - there are better ways to combat social ills.

I'm old enough to be their mum and still irritated that candy colored hair, which I sported myself when I was younger and am contemplating doing again, has become associated with tedious wankery and the belief that biological sex doesn't exist. Give the Manic Panic back to goths, you snotty little gits! So yeah, I totally get why to a teenager "ugh, why do they have to ruin everything that I'd otherwise enjoy?" would be their primary concern.

@Ouchbirthhurted

It's not the one I was thinking of but thank you, still useful to show (sadly)

Upon further thought I'm now not 100% sure it was trans related I'm fairly sure it was in the Feminist section and was an exchange between (perhaps) a man and a woman which turned nasty. Maybe it was a horrible example of what some women put up with from some men.

I'll keep looking, thanks again

Terfisaslur might have it?

twitter.com/shushingthecult

Phoenix I thought you might be interested in Nicole Church's tweet of 8 Feb

My son doesn't think men are a risk to women.
Their nice friends are rarely as nice as boys think they are. It doesn't take long for girls to figure out which boys can be trusted with the truth about their nice friends, and which ones subscribe to the 10th rule of misogyny: The worst thing about male violence is that it makes men look bad.

the 10th rule of misogyny: The worst thing about male violence is that it makes men look bad.
Can we have a T-shirt? This is the worst, most destructive and most tedious thing to put up with: NAMALT.

Hurriedly adds in case anyone isn't on the same wavelength: Obvs the worst thing about male violence is male violence.