Celebrating being female

[Redonionricedpotato]

Feeling quite despondent about the state of the world and how tough it can be to be female in 2018. So I thought I’d start a positive thread, to remind myself of all the positive things about being female. What are yours? Doesn’t matter if they seem trivial, please share!

My body created two other humans. I grew them entirely by sacrificing to them energy from my own body. I pushed them out using a muscle which is stronger than any a man possesses, and then my body's breasts kept them each alive without so much as an additional drop of assistance, for a solid six months each, by literally meeting all their food, water and growth needs. And, in fact, continued long after that being their physical food. It's incredible to think about it. I was their food. They are made from me.

This, from a body that was mocked by others for being skinny, underdeveloped, weak, flat chested, late to mature, 'unwomanly'. As a teenager I felt like a kid whilst my peers looked like women. My periods only started at 15. My breasts never really needed a bra, still don't, and I felt they, and I were inadequate.

I don't think I really accepted how powerful I was until I saw what my body did. The pure, raw, female animal power I felt giving birth changed something about how I perceived myself.

What a brilliant comment from Barrack, hear hear!

Barrack when it's laid out like that it's absolutely mind blowing. Biology is fantastic.

Thank you Barrack, that’s amazing!

How funny - I was thinking about starting a similar thread and didn't know what to say. I love your post Baracker

I love women. I love our biology. My body might have been torn and scarred by pregnancy and childbirth, but I am amazed by it. And my children love it too.

I also love female intelligence and wit and culture. Sometimes the women on MN make me laugh so much and think. Hanging out with women is so nurturing

And I love real women - not the distorted media representation of us, but us in the flesh, flawed and complicated. In fact, I love going to the beach or pool because you see what a huge range of women's bodies there are - so dramatically different from one another but all gorgeous in their own way.

But ultimately it is this power of giving birth to babies that everything stems from. Having babies is the most amazing thing that happened to me, how my body knew what it was doing, how I sent all those hormones at the right time - the nesting instinct - I developed super human strength and determination to push through fixing the house in the later stages of pregnancy.

Women are amazing. Our amazing biology. Here's to us women!

I am really hoping this doesn't come across as insensitive to women who can't have children because I agree with the posters above.

I used to be anxious about my health and self absorbed until I had children. I only realised the strength of my body when I gave birth. All my anxieties went after I'd been through child birth.

The absolute contented joy of suckling my first born at my breast. I've never felt anything like it. I felt as if I were complete. And that nothing that ever happened again would matter. Now he's a menacey 16 year old of course things have returned to normal somewhat. But I can never forget how I felt.

I love the way women care for others. How they unsungly look after all generations just for love. My mum and mother in law have been so amazing helping with the grandchildren. Life would be harder without them. So I celebrate them.

My heart goes out to women who cannot conceive too, but I think this thread is important to speak out.

It is about acknowledging and celebrating biological women, without hiding our light under a bushel.

Also I would encourage younger women to have children and go through this amazing right of passage as a woman. I know too many women that wasted their twenties and thirties on being with unsuitable men or hanging out with gay men and taking on their values, missing the boat, who are consumed by grief for the babies they never had.

I myself 'didn't know if I want to have kids' - and it is really by accident rather than design that I am a mother and I am so glad my biology won out against the intellectual 'anti-child' propaganda that surrounded me.

Being a woman is amazing, and to me, being a mum, is without a doubt, the best bit.

"I also love female intelligence and wit and culture. Sometimes the women on MN make me laugh so much and think. Hanging out with women is so nurturing"

Totally agreed. Whenever I find myself on a site that's all or mostly men I can't help noticing how dull their conversations are, comparatively speaking. It's someone someone hit the mute button on wit and empathy.

I love the emotional support women give each other. I love when women acknowledge how strong they really are. I love seeing women lift each other up.

So I guess mine would be that the thing I love most about being a woman is my connection to other women. It's funny how hard a lot of cultures work to promote the idea that we hate each other and are always in competition over men. If it was true they wouldn't have to try so hard to convince us of it.

I love when you get women of different generations or from different cultures together and that sense of connection clicks into place.

"Whenever I find myself on a site that's all or mostly men I can't help noticing how dull their conversations are, comparatively speaking. It's someone someone hit the mute button on wit and empathy."

That's so true. And I also find it rare that I encounter women's clear thinking in men. I reckon there are probably a fair few male lurkers on MN who feel a bit jealous of it all and when they try to join in, get frustrated because they can't strike the right tone.

Women are so much more cool, funny, clever and kind ....

Also I remember being a young girl and then a young woman and feeling so supported and loved by some of the older women I know, my mother's friends in particular. The best thing about getting older is being able to take on that role now in the lives of younger women and girls.

Another thing - this is going to sound weird - is how terrifying women can be, with their awesomeness.

Some of the women I have met in my life have left me tongue-tied because they are such forces of nature. Even though they might be physically tiny, they can hit you with the force of a hurricane! Such power!

Yes I feel so much love for, and protective of younger women.

All the fairy tales like Snow White and Rupunzel would have you think other wise...

Thank you, Barracker for putting that across so powerfully. I definitely felt most at ease with my physical body post childbirth even though I wouldn't have met any beauty standards. I felt powerful and in awe that my body had grown a human and was keeping it alive.

I love the company of women - I'm from a female dominated family and my gran, mum and sisters were such a support and great company growing up. We were very accepting of each other and I've never recognised the portrayal of groups of women as 'bitchy'. It wasn't my experience growing up and I've not encountered it in my working life either.

Contrary to the image we have presented to us...

I've been in a few emergencies (fires, almost sinking boat, horrible assault) and every time the women have been stoic, calm, dealt with the emergency and supported each other and the men involved too.

I don't know if you've already seen this, but this is such a lovely example of a woman lifting other women up:
blackse.wordpress.com/2013/06/16/if-i-can-do-it-so-can-you/

I love being surrounded by powerful women at work. The culture at my workplace is very male but in the last few years many major positions have gone to women and while I don't always get on with them or agree with them, and sometimes don't like them, the sheer ability to think clearly, quickly grasp the important things, and just get on with things, make progress and demonstrate success is inspiring. And this while we all juggle with having to leave early to collect dcs from nursery because they've vomited. I love the way it's chaotic but ok because we're still getting the job done and out performing many of our male peers while pulling out random kids lollipops from our pockets and using a baby wipe to get rid of the children's snot from our tops.

It's a long story that would derail the thread but the end result is that I ended up mix feeding my oldest - both breast and formula. My boobs adjusted to the timetable we eventually found. They "knew" which two times of day to get lactating. I was bowled over by that. Still am!

The industry I currently work in is dominated by women. And in many ways it's the best working environment I've ever had. I think women are better at collaboration and problem-solving.

I feel a bit differently to everyone else I think

Pregnancy and childbirth is awesome and impressive. But I didn’t like my body post childbirth. It was so changed. The way your vagina is so gapey after I hated it!

Similarly I hate my periods because they are so painful.

But but but. I think that is what I treasure in women. Women’s bodies change. Monthly, yearly, childbearing, menopause.

Men go through puberty and that’s...pretty much it.

I feel like women have a deeper appreciation of something that I can’t vocalise, the passing of time / the cycles of pain - happiness - pain - happiness that lives go through... so many women go though not just live childbirth but miscarriage or stillbirth. We live closer to birth and death than men. For us it stands just behind the frail curtain of contraception.

My body feels both totally unreliable and yet capable of totally amazing things. I feel it gives women empathy in a way men struggle to achieve.

women have a deeper appreciation of something that I can’t vocalise, the passing of time / the cycles of pain - happiness - pain - happiness that lives go through... so many women go though not just live childbirth but miscarriage or stillbirth. We live closer to birth and death than men. For us it stands just behind the frail curtain of contraception.

That is very poetic batteries and has an ancient ring to it.

These are all such amazing posts.... For me, I’d also say that being pregnant, giving birth and breastfeeding have shown me how incredible our female bodies are. And beyond that, just the incredible strength and resistance women show in the most horrendous circumstances. We just keep going, surviving. Women are awesome.

I like pretty dresses and jewellery. Mens clothing and accessories are so boring, and they have to carry all their stuff in their pockets instead of having nice handbags!

"I also love female intelligence and wit and culture. Sometimes the women on MN make me laugh so much and think. Hanging out with women is so nurturing"

Absolutely this. ^^

"And I love real women - not the distorted media representation of us, but us in the flesh, flawed and complicated. In fact, I love going to the beach or pool because you see what a huge range of women's bodies there are - so dramatically different from one another but all gorgeous in their own way."

And this too.

Being a mum to two ds. Such a mixture of pleasure and pain and heartache. Wouldnt change a minute though.