Things men have called me and why.

[CosmicCanary]

Slag lots of times but this was the first.
I was 13 he was late teens.
My crime: I walked past him and did not look at him when he said "alright darling"

Whore
Countless times but the one that sticks in my memory.
Aged 16 he was in his 30s with his mates outside a pub.
My crime: i said no thank you when he asked me for a fuck.

Just a tart
Aged around 19. Him same age.
My crime: I declined his offer of a drink in front of his mates so i was labelled just a tart who was out for free drinks.

Hysterical bitch
Aged 22. Him about same age.
My crime: I told him to fuck off after he repeatedly grabbed my arse while I was waiting at the bar.

prozzy
Aged 22. Him much older.
My crime: wearing a short skirt.

Quite a few years of all the above comments then:

Ugly bitch
Aged 39. Him mid 30s.
My crime: To say no he could not sit on my knee in the pub I was drinking in.

Fat slag
Me aged 40. Him late 20s.
My crime: Telling him to fuck off after he pushed me out of the way in a very long taxi que I had been stood in for 20 mins and I was next in line.

The last one ^^ was last Friday evening.

In all my years I have never called men vile names like I have recieved.
One because I am not rude and vile but more importantly because I fear they would attack me if I spoke to them the same way.

The younger me used to put up with it keep my head down and move out of their way.
The older me fights back a bit but I am still scared they will hit me if I do.

Feel free to list your own.

You remember every comment? Can't say I could.

I doubt it's every comment, just the ones that stuck in her memory. Because they were either scary or deeply unpleasant.

You remember every comment? Can't say I could.

Blimey I would be here all day

Assasin is correct they are just the ones that stand out amongst all of them.

I have 10 yo DDs and I worry that they too will go through what I have and continue to go through.
I am torn between wanting them to stand up for themselves and to not be intimidated as I have been but also fearful that such advice could lead to them being attacked.

What he shouted: fat, ugly cunt
What I was doing: running.
I didn’t take the words ‘fat’ (I’m a size 6) or ‘ugly’ (he was behind me so couldn’t see my face) seriously. ‘Cunt’ got to me though, even though I use it fairly frequently.

What he said: Bring your delicious cunt over here
What I was doing: walking past a group of lads who wanted someone to take a photo of them all.

What he said: You look like a slag
What I was doing: showing a new top to my boyfriend; we were madly in love, together for years, no history for this whatsoever. I left him the next day.

“The trouble with you is that you argue like a man“

What on earth do you mean?

“You just don’t back down!”

Always sticks in my memory.

A fucking slag because I wouldn't go home with him 🤔

'I'd have a go on that' no you really won't dickhead

'Ugly bitch /fat bitch' various people

Funny, really, isn't it, how many men call us "slag" for not sleeping with them (or not being attractive enough to sleep with in their view). Isn't a slag supposed to be, you know, the opposite?

I still get "slag" occasionally, but it's more likely to be "dried-up old hag" these days, and told "no wonder no-one wants you" even though they have no idea whether I am shacked up with the Brigade of Guards. For a bit of variety it's "fat cow". Frankly I am not too bothered if some random bod who is younger than some of my own children doesn't fancy me. I'd actually rather he didn't. Oh, and these charming comments tend to be because I have said no to them in the course of my job, or have rumbled some threadbare excuse. They do so hate being rumbled. I just smile when they start hurling insults because it means that's all they've got.

I've been called all those things, but by as many females as males tbh.

Except fat slag - I've never been fat

cracker that is awful. I'm so sorry. Also, i dont know you, but i know you're not ugly. Everyone is beautiful in their own way.

I was called a fat cunt in the softplay recently. By a woman.

Actually I’ve been called more things by women than men. Beeped at by men, maybe even whistled at back in the day. But name calling has been more from females.

'Would you fuck that?' Said to builder friend about me as I waddled down my street at 41 weeks pg. In 30'C heat. As if I was some sort of exotic offering.

I've been called ugly a lot too. Sometimes I wish I was pretty but I think i'm a nice person and I'd never shout horrible things at anyone.

One thing that sticks in my mind is recently I was standing in my front garden minding my own business when a car came up the street and parked nearby. The door opened and a child's voice started shouting "you in the garden...you're FAT.....you're FAT" on and on. The child's father seemed to think it was funny

My most my recent one was - " fat slag " by a man outside a pub on my way home from the school run with my two older daughter's and my 2 yr old. He looked at the children, and my 30 week pregnant bump and almost spat the words at me in disgust. I came home and cried, and then wondered why I hadn't said anything back to him

I got “come here and I’ll snort coke off your clit” when I was 14. I was in school uniform.

“Fat cunt” x lots

Got called an “ugly dyke” for not kissing a guy who’d just thrown up in the street.

Lots more of course. God it’s delressing.

Oh yes and I remember “fuck me you’re ugly” as I walked past a group of men. It was my first night out with girls from my halls at university. Honestly I thought about every day for such a long time. It’s now nearly 20 years later and it can still bring tears to my eyes. It was so heartfelt. He sort of spat it at me.

People can be so horrible!

I just read the title and thought, yes, I have been called .... Ice Queen and Frigid, but I guess I got off lightly!

I hardly go anywhere like bars or busy streets these days so really don't get called names that much. Just one of the advantages of living in a lovely village. A local high school boy called me a miserable bitch for asking him not to block the pavement but that was ok because he was in uniform, so I just asked him what his head teacher would think of that language and he said Sorry .
When I lived in Paris and had to walk home at night from work I got called a lot of dirty things in many colourful languages but I don't know how to write them here.
Younger days I had all the usual, slag, whore, bitch from guys usually after rejecting them. I think the worst thing, which I remember, was a new boyfriend calling me 'his fuckpuppet' during sex, which rang such loud alarm bells that I left as soon as possible and never returned his calls. Just creepy.

I found it hilarious in my teens when I was at the same time too fat and too ugly to be touched with a bargepole AND a total slag sleeping around with anyone(but him).

In my twenties I was on a night out in Liverpool. I was on crutches. Some bloke just started shouting "you're a dog, you're a dog" in my face. Totally unprovoked. I remember feeling completely shit and wanting to get away but couldn't move fast. I also remember loads of people passing and just laughing. Wtf.

I hate going out at night time for drinks. Lots of men seem to think it's okay to tell you how shit you look. Happened a lot to me when I was younger.

I remember going on the waltzer aged 12. I was wearing a skirt. As I sat there waiting for it to start a man in his thirties shouted that he could see up my skirt and I was a slag.

These episodes have decreased now I'm older and don't go out much. But I still brace myself for abuse when passing large groups of men.

Being called fat or ugly often has nothing to do with actually being those things. When I was young (and certainly not fat, even if not skinny) I was called that more than I've ever been since gaining weight in my 50s. Of course I'm of the age to be invisible now.

I was called ugly too when in fact I was attractive.

Men say these things because they can, not because they're true.

I was 35 and newly divorced from a 15 year marriage. Out one night, met a lovely kind chatty man. Shared a taxi home, dropped my friend off, then went to his flat for a nightcap and further conversation because we got on so well. Naively (hadn't been out with another man for years, didn't realise this obviously meant shag) When I said no, he got really, really nasty and called me a fucking cock-teaser. His face changed into a twisted menacing maniac. Couldn't get out of there fast enough. Wise lesson learnt, night cap or coffee means sex. Have since met a decent man, now my dh.

Used to do a lot of cycling, sometimes with dh and sometimes on my own. Most times on my own, would have verbal abuse hurled at me from men!? But when i was with my dh, nothing! Speaks for itself really, cowards. Still don't get it though, why I couldn't just cycle along in peace?

My view is when a man resorts to those kinds of insults it is because he knows he can't "have you" assert his authority or compete with you on an intellectual level.

I Couldn't count the times I have been called all the insults you listed and more, but I take that individuals need whether male of female to stoop to that level as a psychological win in itself, followed by a pitying/whatever eye roll from myself & a look that let's them know what what a piece of ignorant piece of shit they are goes a long way, and simply walk off head held high.

I have also taught my son this, as people with decent self esteem don't feel the need to insult or belittle others, it says far more about the person who needs to communicate in that way than the recipient of such abuse.