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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Feminist Pub 17: The Bluestocking frolics in the fells and fens of feminism

986 replies

AKnickerfulOfMenace · 07/02/2015 19:25

This is the 17th incarnation of the Feminist Pub!

Here be goats, cannons and chat on feminism and related themes. Also snacks. And booze, copious booze.

Welcome!

OP posts:
EBearhug · 08/02/2015 18:47

I wonder why people think that way? I mean, I know it's because they're sexist idiots, but for something like a pilot, you don't just pitch up and take the helm (or whatever it's called for aircraft.) You have to do however many hours of flying time and qualify as a pilot before you're allowed to do it - and if it's like other male-dominated industries, women are likely going to have to prove themselves that much more than their male peers, so logically, you're probably better off with a female pilot than a male one.

Not sure that I've ever flown with a female pilot, partly because I don't think of it as significantly notable to bother remembering once I'm back on the ground.

EBearhug · 08/02/2015 18:57

Doctor, I would imagine that the barrister is the sort of person who thinks if you're in the same bed as someone, then you've essentially consented, because otherwise, you'd have never gone out in the first place. Sad

I'm sorry it happened to you.

DoctorTwo · 08/02/2015 19:53

Well EBear, I was sleeping on a sofa, he was sleeping with his wife upstairs. Well, he was until he came down and raped me. I did share a bed with a man once and he respected my choice not to have sex with him. He tried but I said no, because I don't identify as gay so he gave up and we went to sleep. He wasn't a rapist, the man who raped me is.

Sorry if I don't reply for a while, during the week I'm out for 17 hours a day so only get about 6 hours sleep a day. I might have to get a laptop...

ChunkyPickle · 08/02/2015 20:02

We took DSes to see Big Hero 6 today (we will not be welcome back, DS2 decided that the sweet he wanted was at the bottom of the cup and upended it all on the floor to search for it before I could stop him)

Nice to see that whilst the Hero (Hiro) was male, 2/4 of the supporting heros were female, as was 50% of the 3rd line cast (including a test pilot) - admittedly, there was a bit of stereo typing (chemist woman hero, in her pink and purple outfit who through exploding balls from her hero's handbag), but not as bad as other cartoons.

Perhaps I shouldn't have been so surprised - Wreck it Ralph was done by the same people and wasn't too bad about the balance either

Original poster
AKnickerfulOfMenace · 08/02/2015 20:09

So sorry DoctorTwo Flowers

OP posts:
PetulaGordino · 08/02/2015 20:10

I'm so sorry he did that to you Flowers

HouseWhereNobodyLives · 08/02/2015 20:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PuffinsAreFictitious · 08/02/2015 21:56

Doctor... I am so sorry that happened to you Thanks

Go and sleep!

UptoapointLordCopper · 09/02/2015 07:51

Found you all!

DoctorTwo Flowers

BuffytheThunderLizard · 09/02/2015 08:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

UptoapointLordCopper · 09/02/2015 09:53

Haven't been here much over the weekend, but I see that we have visitors.

It's the year of the goat soon. The pub goat will be pleased. (Or do we still have a pub goat?)

Original poster
AKnickerfulOfMenace · 09/02/2015 10:06

The goat will be round the back near the chamber pot cupboard, unless the urchins have stolen her for food...

OP posts:
ifyourehoppyandyouknowit · 09/02/2015 12:36

More likely that goat will have eaten the urchins?

Doctor Flowers

EElisavetaOfBelsornia · 09/02/2015 12:46

House he certainly doesn't have a 'partner', heaven forfend. He has a wife, with a badge of ownership and everything. Oh and how she might feel is utterly irrelevant, she is a woman.

Doctor Flowers It's awful that that rapey creep is spouting this crap.

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom · 09/02/2015 12:53

Doctor Sad. I hope you have crammed some sleep in between hideous shifts.

Not that it will be the slightest consolation, but I suspect that that idiot barrister would see you as a 'proper' victim. You may have been drinking, but you were raped by a man when you don't identify as sexually attracted to men. It's only the sex you're attracted to that you are in a permanent state of 'almost consent' towards. Because rape is all about sexual attraction don't you know Hmm

Depresses me so much that people with professional involvement in law can be so.... so...I just don't have the words. So idiotically cuntish.

DoctorTwo · 09/02/2015 20:59

Thank you all. What about if a man raped a woman who self identified as gay? Would he see that as rape?

Thank you all. It was a while ago and beyond here I've never told anybody. Like many people, mostly women, I'm trying to put it behind me and live my life.

The hours I'm working for the next few weeks are bloody horrendous but should lessen after.

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom · 09/02/2015 21:05

I suspect that a man like that doesn't really 'believe' in gay women.

I suspect it goes: women are always half asking for it (regardless of persuasion). Gay men are always half asking for it.

I don't want to act like I'm trying to turn this into a theoretical debate about something so awful that has really happened to you. I was just trying to underline his cuntishness really. Angry

UptoapointLordCopper · 09/02/2015 21:10

Today I did not check my work email after my working hours. Shock

That's my New Week Resolution.

HouseWhereNobodyLives · 09/02/2015 21:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom · 09/02/2015 21:24

I think that that is sadly very true.

Some men say it semi-openly. Others talk as if it would be far worse if they were raped than if a woman was (I remember a lot of this around the time of that Hollyoaks storyline years ago). Which is only really explicable if you think, on some level, that a woman is always half wanting it. Whereas the reality is both are horrific crimes.

Or the number of people think that rape by a partner is not a 'real rape'.

It's just depressing all round.

EBearhug · 09/02/2015 23:02

Why does my body decide it wants to have a normal body clock that goes to bed before midnight on the week when I have a load of early-hours server updates planned?

UptoapointLordCopper · 10/02/2015 09:43

Atwood at west point.

ifyourehoppyandyouknowit · 10/02/2015 11:20

Will have a read of that at lunch.

Chatting to a friend yesterday, who has been passed over for promotion, despite external stakeholders specifically asking that she be put in place as she's very very good at her job, in favour of someone who no one likes, external clients refuse to communicate with as the quality of work is so bad, and has a reputation for laziness. But that man isn't pregnant and doesn't have a small child. So much bullshit.

EBearhug · 10/02/2015 11:24

I hope the external clients give their feedback, but probably it'll just mean they go elsewhere.

ifyourehoppyandyouknowit · 10/02/2015 12:05

They don't really have a choice about going elsewhere due to the setting, but I don't think the feedback will matter. She caused some 'ruffled feathers' by whistleblowing some unsafe practices, and that plus being pregnant has basically meant she is at the bottom of the pile for her bosses. I'm really cross for her.