Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

not sure what to title this but it's to do with ejaculation

490 replies

YuleingFanjo · 15/02/2012 10:59

and in particular a man ejaculating on a woman's face. Sorry - I feel awful writing it down.

I was talking to a friend last night, she is much nore sexually adventurous than I am and she was saying that she thought it was part of normal sexual behaviour, that most men found it a turn on and most people she knew thought it was normal.

I argued that it was something that came from porn, was not what I would call normal and there was no equivilant sexual 'thing' for a woman to do to a man. She said that women can 'gush' (I have never done this, maybe I am abnormal) or piss or poo (!) which I pointed out was a totally different thing. But is it?

I was trying to discuss it with her and point out that her sexual encounters are out of the norm, definitely aren't encounters within a loving relationship, and that ejaculating in someones's face is surely more about disrespect than anything else?

or am I wrong. I just find it really horrible and if anyone asked me to let them do so I would show them the door.

Soory - I hope I don't sound like some hairy trucker trying to get off on the whole thing, and I am not asking for personal experiences (I would prefer not to read them thanks) but more to discuss if I am right about the power/porn/disrespect thing...

OP posts:
Beachcomber · 16/02/2012 20:48

Yellowraincoat this is a supposed feminist/women's right's discussion board.

You got pissed off earlier because you felt things were too personal/judging of your personal values.

Now you are pissed off because I am trying to make things less personal.

Make your mind up.

I'm not trying to silence anybody, I'm just engaging in a little feminist analysis. (What with this being a feminist board and all).

AyeRobot · 16/02/2012 20:48

Haven't decided what I think on that yet, WW. Fairly sure it's about as niche as films about sex whilst up a tree, though, in global terms. Why that might be is anyone's guess. Want to have a stab?

What do you think about the attitude of men to facial spunking, WW
? Not what they've told you, but what they have said to each other.

yellowraincoat · 16/02/2012 20:49

I don't think that this is helpful, Beachcomber, why don't we just stay on topic?

TBE · 16/02/2012 20:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

yellowraincoat · 16/02/2012 20:52

I don't think that being narky at each other and mocking what other women find sexually exciting or progressive will help us either, TBE.

AyeRobot · 16/02/2012 20:53

Oh, is there just enough "treat women like shit" stuff in there to keep hubby happy whilst you watch it together? Great stuff.

YuleingFanjo · 16/02/2012 20:55

Have to laugh about telling people to stay on topic Grin
I am not sure many people understand what the topic is - my bad.

OP posts:
Malificence · 16/02/2012 20:56

It's interesting to me that Petra Joy won't have images of men ejaculating on women in her films, which are marketed as being indicative of womens' sexual desires and fantasies.

yellowraincoat · 16/02/2012 20:58

Marketed by one person, Malificence. It doesn't really make sense to say "well that's what this women says other women want, so that's obviously what they want".

Plenty of women on this thread have said they enjoy being ejaculated on. Why are trying to deny that experience, or make out that we are somehow deluded?

YuleingFanjo · 16/02/2012 20:59

May I ask... what do you enjoy about it?

OP posts:
AyeRobot · 16/02/2012 21:00

the menz?

yellowraincoat · 16/02/2012 21:01

What does it matter what I personally enjoy about it? What do people enjoy about anything sexual? I enjoy it, full stop. I don't feel like I need to justify that.

YuleingFanjo · 16/02/2012 21:05

I wasn't asking for justification. I was just interested but it's ok.

OP posts:
YuleingFanjo · 16/02/2012 21:06

sorry. Didn't mean to offend.

OP posts:
yellowraincoat · 16/02/2012 21:07

You weren't asking for justification but that's how it would end up coming across and I don't really feel like having my personal sexual feelings dragged over the coals by the holier-than-thou crowd this evening.

Beachcomber · 16/02/2012 21:12

This thread is depressing me with its 'but porn is made by women too' and its 'porn is not real' cognitive dissonance.

yeah let's just chill and open our minds (and hope our brains don't fall out in the meantime).

I'm glad if you have found anything I've posted of interest, YuleingFanjo. I think I may have to step away from this one now, it will only despair me.

On choice/consenting adults/BDSM/open-mindedness

I think there is a word of caution there for us all in this here patriarchy.

LulaFortune · 16/02/2012 21:13

To the OP - how old is your friend? I'm 40 and for most of my sexual life I have used condoms to both protect my sexual health and for birth control... so my non-political contribution is that for me and the majority of my friends, allowing a man to ejaculate in your face is fairly common. Safe (penetrative) sex is the norm, and if a man doesn't want to ejaculate in a condom then the face/ neck/ breasts is fairly common (with a helping hand from the woman).

There's a huge difference between exploring and sharing experiences (and fluids) in a safe and consensual way (even in a ONS) than doing it because it's expected or forced.

Sorry, that was a bit of a rambling response but I do think that sexual practices change over time. I'm not convinced that porn is the only factor in this and I don't think it is of itself a degrading or disempowering act. It's all in the context.

Oh, and... apologies but If for some that is having ejaculate on their face, I won't stand in their way made me snigger in a slightly juvenile way

JerichoStarQuilt · 16/02/2012 21:15

Great posts beachcomber.

yellowraincoat · 16/02/2012 21:17

The ideas shown in porn are not necessarily what really goes on Beachcomber. You're the one showing the cognitive dissonance by blatantly ignoring what I said to you.

You really are being horribly patronising you know.

AyeRobot · 16/02/2012 21:18

THE JIZZING MEN?

LulaFortune · 16/02/2012 21:19

beachcomber - how do you feel about porn by women for women? It's a growing market.

TBE · 16/02/2012 21:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

yellowraincoat · 16/02/2012 21:21

What's the difference though, Lula? Are we to believe that all women want is softly softly nice sex? Some women like rough, dare I say it, degrading sex.

Surely we should be striving to get past this gender binary crap of men like this and women like that?

yellowraincoat · 16/02/2012 21:22

So what you're saying TBE is that when a man spunks on your face, he's disrespecting you and you should therefore leave him?

TBE · 16/02/2012 21:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.